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BIL can suck it!

Posted by on Mar. 28, 2011 at 1:18 PM
  • 14 Replies

My SIL turned 18 on Saturday. We agreed to have dinner here.. so after working all morning ( I work 6am-2), I came home and cooked dinner for 13 people. I was happy to do it, as I love SIL and appreciate everything she does for us ( babysitter). The plan was dinner at our place, then MIL was giong to take our kids and BIL's kids home with her (by 7)  so we could all go out and celebrate at the club.. Her, her BF, 3 BIL's, 3 of their GF's and me and SO. Well our room is downstairs, and I went down there to grab a case of pepsi from the storage room, and BIL comes walking out of my bedroom.. UM WHAT????? So I go in there, and smell cigarette smoke. We do not smoke in our home.. he knows this, which is why he hid in our bedroom. So if I wasn't mad enough about the cigarette.. I was livid he was in my bedroom.SO and I have a strict rule that our bedroom is our space.. the kids aren't even allowed in our room.

I go upstairs and I tell SO to handle it later, but just wanted to give him a heads up..

Well his brothers didn't feel like going out anymore and his sister already left with friends, and instead his brothers wanted to play kinect at our house. We told them no, that if no one was going out, we needed to get the kids ready for bed.. (I'ts 9 by now, already 2 hours past the time everyone was going to be gone).. SO and BIL get into an arguement.. and BIL is like "THis is a party".. and SO corrected him and said that we only agreed to have dinner here, not a party..

SD has an accident, and I wasn't changing her into more day time clothes , so I put her in her PJ's and my son wanted his on as well.. I'm staying out of this the whole time.. because in the end, I will take my kids and watch a movie in their room until company leaves.. SO knows this.. but he's irritated that our home was being disrespected..

As I'm changing the kids.. I hear BIL YELL "When will you get your head out of her ass, and start spending time with your family".. and SO YELLED BACK " Just as soon as you learn that I have a family, a beautiful fiance and two wonderful kids. What I'm trying to do is spend time with my family, get my kids to bed and spend the evening with my woman".. BIL yelled back "Kid.. just one! You only have one kid. The boy ain't yours so stop acting like super dad. You are not his daddy. Tell your fiance (snotty tone) to go find her baby daddy ".. (my son's father is in prison for DV against me, in front of my son)

I lost it.. my son is not biologically SO's, but he's the only father my son has ever known. Our kids are both 3, and they know that SO is not my son's dad and that they aren't biologicially brother and sister, but they know that we are a family, and that in every way that matters they are brother and sister..

I went out there.. about to tell BIL to get out of my house, because my kids had heard them and I'm not okay with that.. but SO beat me to it.. he told BIL " I have two children. They are both mine. J might not be mine by blood, but I'm his dad. Get the fuck over it and get the fuck out of my house"

I told SO that he can make whatever choice he wants to make, but that his BIL is not welcome in my home again. I had to kiss away the tears while my son cried saying that he loves SO and that he wants SO to be his REAL daddy.. BIL can suck it!!!!

is not the only way to resolve inner conflicts.  Life itself still
remains a very effective therapist. 
~Karen Horney, Our Inner Conflicts, 1945

by on Mar. 28, 2011 at 1:18 PM
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Replies (1-10):
by on Mar. 28, 2011 at 1:24 PM

 What an A$$HOLE! I would not welcome him into my home again either. That is a horrible thing to say.

I really dislike most of my il's but the one thing they have been good about is not making ds feel like an outsider the few times we are around them (live out of state). I was worried since ds is the only step child in the entire family between all 7 of dh's siblings.

Your SO rocks btw!

by Ruby Member on Mar. 28, 2011 at 1:29 PM

 Good for your SO.

by on Mar. 28, 2011 at 1:34 PM

What an ass.

My sister once made the mistake of saying my 23 wasn't really her niece.  Of course she said this after our mom had died. I said well you know mom considered her to be her granddaughter and A called her granny.  It was the first and last time she made that mistake.  I was able to adopt her when she turned 18 and she is my child in all ways.

Your SO did the right thing.  Children are innocent and should never be put in that type of position.

by on Mar. 28, 2011 at 1:35 PM

Quoting blessed107:

 Good for your SO.

I'm a daughter, wife, mother, & fire fighter.

Don't like me guess what? I have 5 fingers and the middle one is for you!


by on Mar. 28, 2011 at 1:38 PM

Good for your SO!

What kind of disrespectful buttmonkies refuse to leave someone's house whent hey are asked?  My BILs wouldn't dream of hnaging around if my DH said "Well parties over, we have to get the kiddos to bed".

by Platinum Member on Mar. 28, 2011 at 1:40 PM

See that's what I am talking about. Your SO stood up for his wonderful family, that's horrible a grown man would say something like that when your children could hear him.

by Gold Member on Mar. 28, 2011 at 1:41 PM


Quoting blessed107:

 Good for your SO.


by Rah-Rah on Mar. 28, 2011 at 1:42 PM
I'm soooo glad he spoke up. Wtg. BIL sure looks like an ass clown.
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by on Mar. 28, 2011 at 1:43 PM

now your df, THAT is a real man. i just wanna go and high 5 him. tell him i said he is great and wonderful and you are a lucky woman!

by on Mar. 28, 2011 at 1:46 PM

wow what a douche!

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