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I hate feeling this way :(

Posted by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 5:46 PM
  • 8 Replies

I apologize if it is all over the place..lol.

My SO has a twin brother. They have always been really close, mostly because they have always been together. SO's mother always looks down on him and criticizes everything he does so they tend to stick together, even now. But it's starting to really bother me. I love that he is soo close to his brother and loves him so much, he would be lost without him. Everything he does in life he MUST call his brother and let him know, anywhere he goes his brother MUST go or he at least has to know. It wouldn't be so bad but every time his brother goes, his brothers wife must go. He takes advantage of SO and I don't think SO realizes it because they are so close. We buy his wife her cigarettes even though she's pregnant, they are always "borrowing" money and of course never pays us back knowing that we are unemployed right now because SO's company he worked for went under a few months ago. He said he wanted to go fishing today to have some alone time to himself which is fine, I need some time to myself once in awhile too, but then he pulls in the driveway with his brother and SIL and decided that they wanted to go to. I have to BEG him to go with me and take the kids to the park on a nice day but can run around ALL day with his brother and SIL. We only have a van so when he is gone, I am stuck at home all day with the kids. He talks to his brother about things before he talks to me when it involves our family. I feel like he is in a relationship with his brother and SIL instead of me. I want him to have a relationship with his brother but not when it impacts our family, that is the main reason for our fights. Not to mention $200 of his last check had to go to his brothers rent when he knew we wouldn't have money coming in till he got his unemployment approved. He never paid us back and doesn't plan on it. I am just sick of me and the kids coming second in his life. Sorry if it seems like I'm rambling but I don't know what to do about it. I have talked to him about it and he just says that they are twins and it's normal for them to spend that much time together. Should I let it go and suck it up?  I am just really frustrated at the moment. His brother relies on him too much and I will hate to know what it will be like when their baby gets here. Am I being a bitch or am I being realistic? He thinks I'm being crazy for think this way. I wouldn't mind him spending so much time with his brother if he spent a little time with the kids OUT OF THE HOUSE for a change, I hate begging him to take us somewhere fun but he jumps to it when his brother needs a ride or money.  His brother is always talking s*** about him to their family, and SO never has the heart to say anything because he is afraid to lose his brother. just soo confused

no bashing, I can do without that at the moment....thanks

by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 5:46 PM
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Replies (1-8):
mysoldier5
by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 6:17 PM

BUMP!

MultiPara
by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 6:18 PM

Im sorry hun :(

mysoldier5
by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 7:39 PM

Is this post not enough drama for some??? I really needed help here ladies.

mysoldier5
by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 7:40 PM

BUMP!

xtwistedxlovex
by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 7:55 PM

I don't know what to tell you, mama...IMO his behavior is absolutely not okay, but I don't know how you could get through to him. You're definitely not crazy for feeling this way.

mysoldier5
by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 8:47 PM

I feel bad cause I don't want him to think I don't want him hanging with his brother and thats all he see's :(.

Quoting xtwistedxlovex:

I don't know what to tell you, mama...IMO his behavior is absolutely not okay, but I don't know how you could get through to him. You're definitely not crazy for feeling this way.


mysoldier5
by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 8:48 PM

BUMP!

Proud_Mama830
by on Apr. 13, 2011 at 9:20 PM

:( I agree with this. Some people just can't, or dont want to, see when people they love take advantage of them.  But he does need to realize that yall come first, not his brother and your SIL.

Quoting xtwistedxlovex:

I don't know what to tell you, mama...IMO his behavior is absolutely not okay, but I don't know how you could get through to him. You're definitely not crazy for feeling this way.


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