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Worst Sexual Experiences!

Posted by on May. 1, 2011 at 11:58 AM
  • 287 Replies

I did this a loooooooong time ago and the replies were HILARIOUS. I wanna see everyone's WORST sexual experience. Here's mine:

I'd been dating this guy for a very short amount of time, maybe two or three weeks. We hadn't done much, physically and I wasn't all that into him. I was still recovering from my dad passing away and really was only seeing him because I just wanted some male company that made me feel better. I was in his apartment, playing video games and it was becoming apparent he was getting a little impatient with me not really wanting to do anything physical. He turns off the video game and pretty much point blank tells me he's in the mood, so we start making out. Again, I'm not really into it, but feel like I ought to repay him for spending time with me. lol

Things get hot and heavy and he pulls back and confesses he's addicted to porn (or was at one point) and his tastes are a little adventurous, do I have an issue with that? No, I'm pretty much open to new experiences within reason. What's he have in mind? He tells me that he isn't really sure I can do it.

That should have tipped me off right then and there, but I stupidly ask him what's he really want? He wants me to go down on him and then vomit. Uhm... can we say EW? Suddenly, I had a blinding migraine and had to leave to take my medicine. I broke up with him the very next day. What a strange, strange guy. *shudders*


SO LADIES... what about you? What's YOUR worst experience?

by on May. 1, 2011 at 11:58 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Justine1123
by Justine on May. 1, 2011 at 11:59 AM
Ewww never heard of that
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Charweba
by on May. 1, 2011 at 11:59 AM

All 5 of my experiences before DH were horrilbe. Once I slept with DH for the first time I was like um yeah I'm not letting this d*** go! LOL

lyranightshade
by Ruby Member on May. 1, 2011 at 12:00 PM

OH! And I'll add another one! The summer between Senior HS year and my freshman year in college, I started seeing this guy. He was older and sooo handsome. I swear to you, he looked like a blond John Lennon. MM! He was sooo smart and funny. His only down fall was his hardcore addiction to pot (psychological, of course.. he just wanted to be high 100% of the time and often put it ahead of me) and his total lack of ability in bed.

I asked him to go down on me ONCE. ONCE was all it took. You know that Yahoo Messenger emoticon, the one that has it's eyes and mouth wide open and shakes its head back and forth really fast? Yeah. He basically just shoved his head between my legs and did that. NOT PLEASANT. I felt like going to youporn.com and making him take notes. lol

lyranightshade
by Ruby Member on May. 1, 2011 at 12:02 PM

Mine and DH's first time together was so AWKWARD! I hadn't been with anyone in AGES. lol I accidentally elbowed him in the face twice, kneed him in the nuts, bruised his thigh.... and he STILL wanted to see me afterwards! lol He said he felt like he got his ass kicked, but in a good way. Thank god I got a little less awkward as time went on.

Quoting Charweba:

All 5 of my experiences before DH were horrilbe. Once I slept with DH for the first time I was like um yeah I'm not letting this d*** go! LOL


NattysMommy
by on May. 1, 2011 at 12:02 PM

Haha I have nothing like that but bumping to read others!!

myfoursonsks
by on May. 1, 2011 at 12:02 PM

Well, I stuck my hands down a guys pants once and wasn't sure what I had a hold of. I thought to myself, "There is no way that is his penis."

His "penis" was about the size of my ring finger and I have extremely tiny hands. It was so short and narrow.  What the heck was wrong with him?  lol


lyranightshade
by Ruby Member on May. 1, 2011 at 12:02 PM

Yeah, I hadn't either until him. I really wish I hadn't heard of it STILL. lol

Quoting Justine1123:

Ewww never heard of that


lyranightshade
by Ruby Member on May. 1, 2011 at 12:03 PM

Genetic disorder? lol Steroid addict, perhaps? Did he have teeny tiny balls to match? Because if his balls were huge and his weeny was teeny, I think I'd be even more sad. lol

Quoting myfoursonsks:

Well, I stuck my hands down a guys pants once and wasn't sure what I had a hold of. I thought to myself, "There is no way that is his penis."

His "penis" was about the size of my ring finger and I have extremely tiny hands. It was so short and narrow.  What the heck was wrong with him?  lol



randi1978
by Murdoc's Mistress on May. 1, 2011 at 12:04 PM

First boyfriend.....he was not, well.......very well equipped, to put it nicely.  After having sex several times, I was still technically a virgin.  It took him finger banging me to finally "de-virginize" me, LOL.

And while this isn't a worst experience, it's still rather funny.  My daughter was spending the night at my parents' house and the boy-toy came over so we could test out some of my new goodies.  In the midst of getting ready, the phone rings and it's my mom.  She is calling to tell me that my daughter went to bed without issue and she had been really good.  Boy-toy hollers, not realizing I'm on the phone still: "Hey, babe, where did you put the cuffs and riding crop?"

Mom got off the phone with a quickness, LOL.

 


"Sexy, edgy, dangerous. If you Google my name, those are the first three words you see." - Murdoc Niccals

lyranightshade
by Ruby Member on May. 1, 2011 at 12:04 PM

BUMP!

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