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At my wits end, I feel like I'm fighting a loosing battle against my children

Posted by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 6:34 PM
  • 8 Replies
Ok, maybe its the fact that I now have a broken pinky, or maybe its the fact that I have a huge cut on my foot, all from my children slamming a door on me, or maybe its just I'm at my wits end, but I feel like I'm failing in the discipline department of mother-hood. Both my children, ages 1 and almost 3, are what I describe as "ow quit it" kids, in other words, they get in trouble, so to speak, for an action, and turn right around and do the exact same thing. I've been consistant with my 3 year old, one firm warning of "I've asked you not to..." Or something along those lines, followed by "next time it will be time out" and we spend a majority of our day in time out. My 1 year old, I realize is to young for punishments, so we do the redirect, which she has successfully turned into a game for herself. If she's doing something I feel unsafe, or misbehaving, I take her away from the situation, place her somewhere with her toys, and she proceedes to get up, run back towards the trouble, laughing as I go to get her and redirect her again, this will go on for awhile before I place her in a pack-n-play. I'm at the point where I just feel like whatever I say goes completely unnoticed, and like I'm speaking to myself, I've cried thinking I'm just going to give up, because its doing no good anyway, although I know I can't. I just don't know what else to try, I'm firm, I'm consistant, and today after having the door slammed on my foot and hand, I cried. I've tried taking away toys, being firmer, longer timeouts, although I don't exceed 4 minutes, I've tried putting my ds in his room for cool down/quiet time, I'm at a loss. I try interacting with them, reading books, coloring, playing, and at some point one of them throws something, hits the other, pushes the other, destroys whatever we are doing, and warnings begin, followed by whatever punishment. I'm trying my hardest to keep cool and calm, I just don't know what I'm doing wrong, and I'm really asking for genuine help and advice because my kids are taking over. We don't spank, and I don't want to reduce to that, there's been times when I've had to take a time out also to keep from doing so. HELP!
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by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 6:34 PM
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Replies (1-8):
SuperPickle
by Ruby Member on Aug. 17, 2011 at 6:36 PM

I love the book 1-2-3 Magic. The techniques in there really helped in my houseful of boys!

frndlyfn
by Emerald Member on Aug. 17, 2011 at 6:40 PM

Hugs I am not sure what to say.    Is it possible they are bored so they act out ?  Siblings can and will feed off each others bad behavior or good behavior.  The book Super Pickle suggested is good.

arkansasmama08
by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 6:41 PM
Ahhh, you've been in my house this week!! Its been bad here too. End of summer jitters I guess. How old is the "1 year old"? Like, exactly 12 months? My youngest is 16 months and I've just started timeouts this week for lack of other options lol. I make him sit for 1 minute. He plays the same game yours does. Make sure you tell her no firmly and maybe it'll help give her a hint that its not funny. I've had many nights where I've cried after putting them to bed. Some kids are just stubborn and hard headed. I spank also and that tends to fix a rotten attitude in a hurry. For a while at least lol
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briellesmomma
by Gold Member on Aug. 17, 2011 at 6:41 PM

Your 1 year old sounds like my 10 month old.

I really do hope someone gives you some good advice as I have none :(

britt80
by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 6:49 PM
My one year old is 15 months, so maybe I will start small time outs. She is definately a drama queen, you tell her "no" and omg you'd think you just ripped her to pieces, throwing herself on the floor kicking and screaming tantrumns, that's when we usually do the pack-n-play because she has hurt herself throwing such tantrumns. Lol I honestly don't know what's going on, but its a bit nerve racking lol


Quoting arkansasmama08:

Ahhh, you've been in my house this week!! Its been bad here too. End of summer jitters I guess. How old is the "1 year old"? Like, exactly 12 months? My youngest is 16 months and I've just started timeouts this week for lack of other options lol. I make him sit for 1 minute. He plays the same game yours does. Make sure you tell her no firmly and maybe it'll help give her a hint that its not funny. I've had many nights where I've cried after putting them to bed. Some kids are just stubborn and hard headed. I spank also and that tends to fix a rotten attitude in a hurry. For a while at least lol

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britt80
by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 6:51 PM
Do they offer the book at any book store or is it something only found online? I've never heard of it honestly, but I'm willing to try anything at this point


Quoting SuperPickle:

I love the book 1-2-3 Magic. The techniques in there really helped in my houseful of boys!


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britt80
by on Aug. 17, 2011 at 7:02 PM
I really hope they aren't bored, considering we have a pretty consistant schedule and during one point in our day we have "exciting adventure time" whether it be going to the park, going to the pool, there's this really awesome indoor gym place here I love that is for kids of all ages, and affordable we go to, coloring/craft time, you name it we try to shake up activities everyday, but the schedule is the same.
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frndlyfn
by Emerald Member on Aug. 17, 2011 at 7:41 PM

The libraries in our area even have the 1-2-3 book.   I read it and returned it.   When you have library time see if someone can help you find that section of books.   I wonder if they know the end of summer is coming and are getting jittery like older school kids do.  My dd is 5 and boy she has been pushing buttons like crazy.

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