Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

yep .... im selfish and awful ★!VENT!★

Posted by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 1:14 PM
  • 39 Replies
All I want is time 4 seconds even in my cumfy chair with no child touching me. My toddler is glued to my leg and the baby wont let me put her down. My older kids Constantly yelling mommy. I just can't take it anymore I don't know if its aunt flow being here or what. All the while my dh is sick from chemo. I'm being selfish in wanting to have time by myself when I need to be here for him and deal with the kids. Last night I honestly wanted to run as far away as possible. Just run. I dread bringing him anything because he's mean to me. Ugh. I can't leave him now.but I honestly don't think I.will stay after this is all over. :-( I'm an awful person. And I can not handle it anymore and theres no one to turn to.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 1:14 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
momof4boyz1girl
by Diamond Member on Sep. 14, 2011 at 1:15 PM

You're not awful and you're not selfish...you are human. Mother or not, everyone needs their space. I hope you can figure out a way to get it soon.

F_Stathouse
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 1:18 PM

Hugs Momma; everyone needs their space. Maybe 5 minutes in the bathroom might help. I sit in my bathroom on the floor up against the door put my IPod on and read for a little bit. Hugs and breathe it will get better. 

tdoubleday04
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 1:19 PM

WOW!  I'm sorry you are going through this.  If kids won't nap, tell them it is quiet time in their rooms for 45 minutes, make them play, read whatever.  Your baby will be fine to cry, that teaches him/her that they really will be fine not attached to you 24/7.  Make sure babies needs are met, change diaper, feed, put in safe place with some toys and pic a quiet spot in the house and sit there 10 minutes, then check on baby, and repeat.  How sick is DH?  too sick to help with kids?  I only ask because my friend had CHEMO and still had to take care of her lo when she got out of the hospital.  Anyway, as far as you leaving DH after he isnt' sick.  Was he an ass before he got sick?  maybe he is just depressed now and being a douch because he is scared?  IDK I'm not there and don't know him, but if this all started when he got sick, I'm willing to bet he will be better when he is better.  *HUGS*  oh are you from fort dodge IA?  lol, if you are I am more than willing to help you out with the kids and give you a break. :)

-42-
by Gold Member on Sep. 14, 2011 at 1:21 PM

You're not awful, you're human. There's only so much we can take before we need a break!

Is there ANYONE who can take your kids for even an hour? Drop in daycare, friend, family, anything? You need to destress or you will lose it.

Having a SO with cancer is hard enough, I know. 

If it comes down to it, put your kids in a safe spot(crib, playpen, etc.) and lock yourself in the quietest room you can find. Clear your head. You CAN do this, you are NOT selfish for wanting a moment to yourself, and YOU ARE NOT AWFUL. 

Aydans_Mommy
by Ruby Member on Sep. 14, 2011 at 1:22 PM
Hugs!!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
danssugarbabe
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 1:22 PM

Hugs sweetie I agree with those above with good advice.  It does help to have a few minutes by yourself.

angelenia
by Gold Member on Sep. 14, 2011 at 1:22 PM
oh, *hugs* mama. You aren't selfish or awful. You are exhausted. And human. And stressed to the hilt. You need some space just to catch your breath a little. I completely understand. I hope you are able to get some quiet alone time soon.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
hailey3
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 1:24 PM
I've locked myself in the bathroom and cried along with the screaming kid outside the door. But with dh sick I can't do it. He needs his rest. I takebthe kids to the park and normally the toddler will play but no. Now she sits touching me. Arms around my leg or arm or hanging on me a hand touching. I just need space and aunt flow really seems to have gotten to me this month. The kids gravitate towards mommy betch mommy wants to kill something. My poor assistant got it again today because someone at the coffee shop screwed up I feel awful. Ive never lashed out like this and ill go from this to laughing in a second then tears.

Quoting F_Stathouse:

Hugs Momma; everyone needs their space. Maybe 5 minutes in the bathroom might help. I sit in my bathroom on the floor up against the door put my IPod on and read for a little bit. Hugs and breathe it will get better. 

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Samanthamommy
by on Sep. 14, 2011 at 1:25 PM

I'm so sorry. I wish there was some kind of advice I could offer, but it seems like you are dealing with a lot right now. I hope things improve for you.

Can you hire a babysitter, or have a family member watch them for a little bit so you get some time to yourself?

Lunachick1974
by Member on Sep. 14, 2011 at 1:26 PM

Big hugs momma!!! You are not awful.  Honestly, I think you are quite the opposite.  You are a great wife for supporting your husband.  You are a great mom for supporting you kids when I'm sure there are times you want to run and hide.  You do need time to yourself.  Do you have any mom support groups in your area? Try meetup.com. Maybe you can find a mom's group and someone can come over and entertain the kids for a bit so you can regroup.  If you live in CT I would be more then willing to help.


Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)