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parenting time, am I thinking correctly?

Posted by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 12:41 PM
  • 28 Replies

I have primary custody of DD1, since Apr our parenting time schedule has been "short week" she goes to her dad's house Wed after school then returns Thurs at 730 then on his "long week" he gets her Wed-Sun at 7pm. He has supervised visited due to the fact that he is classified with a mental disorder.
He is going away for Thanksgiving, 12 days, no big deal he does this every year. It is his holiday, but at this time I refuse to sign for her to get passport. The problem is he will be gone on his weekend & he thinks that time will just freeze so the weekend he returns (my scheduled wkend) he will just automatically get her.

Am I right in thinking that he loses his time by his choice to go on vacation unless I agree to change weekends? Which means she will be with me 3 weekends in a row.

EDIT:  I try to be flexible with him & he doesnt return the favor if needed.  He has done several things that are irresponsible.  Plus this isnt the first time he has willingly given up his parenting time to vacation WITHOUT her.

by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 12:41 PM
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Replies (1-10):
LancesMom
by Ruby Member on Nov. 9, 2011 at 1:37 PM

How would you want it to work out if you had to miss yours? Would it work to switch off or are you looking a future weekends that you may have to switch down the road.

haleyleedy
by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 1:39 PM
this. we have custody of sd. and when her mom had custody if she had to go out of town or we did we made adjustments.


Quoting LancesMom:

How would you want it to work out if you had to miss yours? Would it work to switch off or are you looking a future weekends that you may have to switch down the road.


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coolmommy2x
by Ruby Member on Nov. 9, 2011 at 1:40 PM
1 mom liked this

 I don't have experience in this but it seems to me that legally he'll lose his time due to his choice to go on vacation.

That said, is it really a big deal to let him see DD when he gets back even if it's your time?

1likeme
by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 1:41 PM
If you were inclined he could have the weekend. A judge won't force that on you because it is his choice to stay and spend time with his child. If it were circumstances that he had no control over such as legal issues or work scheduling a judge would order that his missed parenting time be made up.
Most of the time it's not worth the fight. If you can accommodate a change for that weekend I would say do it because not changing the schedule for reasonable requests can bite you in the ass later.
MZ82
by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 1:41 PM
I always try to be flexible with my ex husband. I figure, if Im a biotch towars him when he asks for a switch, he wont be so willing to switch when I need it. You have to do whats best for you and your dd though.
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Michellina11234
by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 1:44 PM

Is it difficult to swtich because of the supervision? If that is not the case, I would  be flexible. They time may come  when you may need him to be flexible too. It really is all that is best for the kids.

stefvan
by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 1:47 PM

 I think you and your x should work out visitation to make up if he misses due to vacation.  You are 2 adults and should talk things out like 2 adults.  Your child is the one who will suffer if you don't.

cgarlic
by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 7:28 PM

bump for edit

cgarlic
by on Nov. 9, 2011 at 7:32 PM

I am thinking of what's in the best interest of the child.  She doesnt like going over there, but is only 7.5 so the court wont talk to her.  She has always been with me & he never showed interest (saw her 8 hrs per week) until last Oct when he realized I was in a serious relationship.

haleyleedy
by on Nov. 10, 2011 at 7:45 AM
if you wont sign for the passport. you cannot be pissed he planned a vacation without her. forbyour daughters sake let go of the past if he wants to.see her let him there relationship is.more important than your bitterness.
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