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Should I Tell Her What I Saw? *Small Addition*

Posted by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 8:28 AM
  • 136 Replies
So, last night, I had the opportunity to go out for a while. It's been a long time, and I was super excited. I went to a country dancing saloon, and they had karaoke. Yay!

During the week, I teach music. One of my families, who has been with me since I started, seems like the perfect family. Their son is one of my favorite students. Mom usually brings him, but I've met Dad a few times, too. Within the course of our professional relationship, though, I've become friends with mom, to an extent.

Anyways, back to last night. I was singing karaoke, and from the stage, I saw my student's dad... Making out with another woman. He didn't see me. I'm really upset about it, mainly because I hold a professional relationship with this family.

Just in case, I took a picture of it, but I don't know if I should use it. Having been cheated on before (and finding out due to my own devices), I would've wanted someone to tell me. When I found out, though, I didn't only lose my DH - I lost a lot of friends who had known about the cheating, but stayed silent. Then again, this may not be my place.

... So, should I tell her?

ETA - I don't think they're swingers. Mom has always been pretty free with what she's said, and when I told her that my DH and I separated, she responded, "Oh, dear. I'm so sorry. Did he cheat? I'd throw mine to the curb if he did that to me. I don't share with anyone, under any circumstance." (I'm paraphrasing. I don't remember what she said, word for word, but this was the gist of it.)

ETA/Update #2:

I'm sorry I jumped ship on this thread. I had some family activities to attend to. I'll try to answer more of your questions.

I am friendly with her - we've gone out to coffee and happy hour a few times. Still, I am professional with her, too. As it stands, if I say anything (which I haven't decided), it will be anonymously.

I am sure it was her husband. I walked by to take the pic. He had his tongue crammed down crack-lady's throat, but it was him. His wedding band was glimmering in the lights (the one that they showed me shortly after their Hawaii wedding). Ugh.

While she and I were out last week, she mentioned that she felt ill-at-ease about her DH, and was worried that he might get laid off - because he was being distant and working later hours to "save his job".

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by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 8:28 AM
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Replies (1-10):
spreadmywings
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 8:31 AM
2 moms liked this
Would I want to find out from my child's music teacher? Hmmm, with a pic. I would stay out of it.
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militarymommy19
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 8:31 AM
2 moms liked this
Thats a sticky situation. Any way you can send the pic anon?
emmy526
by Emmy on Jan. 15, 2012 at 8:31 AM
6 moms liked this

mail it anonymously

gamomof3cuties
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 8:31 AM

I wouldn't tell. For all you know that could be their arrangement and then you will come off as you are judging them.

HaileysMommy130
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 8:31 AM
Id be torn too. You don't want to be responsible for tearing a family apart but then again that's really wrong.
Leave it be for now. Maybe they are swingers?
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First_One_8_18
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 8:31 AM
I dunno. That's a tough one. Do u know her email address? Can u send an anonymous email w the picture? I would hate for you to lose your professional relationship w her.
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Kodysmommy928
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 8:32 AM

 I wouldn't tell her face to face, but I would make sure she saw that pic.  Are you 100% positive it is him?  If you are I would have someone text her the pic from a random number.

suesue97
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 8:33 AM
8 moms liked this

I might say, "Hey, I saw Jeff at the dance hall the other night" and then not mention that you saw him kissing someone.  Since he probably didn't even tell her where he was, this might be enough for her to realize he's lying. 

Tough situation though.  and sad. 

sunfreezeinmi
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 8:33 AM
I think I'd stay out of it. They could have an open marriage or something like that. But.. I don't know, having never been in this situation myself. :/
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PinkyPan
by on Jan. 15, 2012 at 8:35 AM
2 moms liked this

Yikes! I would stay out of it. 

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