Hmm. Your opinion on this

[Jnc91]

What level of involvement should step parents have? Specifically regarding Parent teacher conferences. Here's a few examples:
1) bm's new husband and bf's new wife wants to go to the conference. Should they? Or is 4 a crowd?

2) normally bm and bf go to the conference. This year bf has to go on a work trip. Should sm go in his place? Or just let bm go by herself?

3) should the spouse of the cp be allowed to go since the child lives with them most of the time and s/he probably takes care of them more than their true bm/bf?

4) does length of new marriage need to be considered? 2 week old sm stay away while 5 Yr sf can go to the meeting?

What are your opnions?

[.betty.white.]

I think its awesome that step parents would want to be that involved and YES they all should go!!

[alwayskk]

As long as everyone is getting along or can stay civil, I think it's okay for the step parents to go. I do think the length of courtship/marriage should be considered. If I had only been a SM for two weeks after a few months of courtship, I might still go to the conference, but I would mind my place and sit there quietly supporting my husband.

[LoriDeen]

We've never had this issue because their BM was never interested enough to attend an open house. Sad but true.

[LizzieAnnesMom]

i think it depends on the comfort level of the famy and child. in some it would be encouraged for the stepmother/father to be involved, in some cases not.

[kzuehlk]

As long as everyone can stay civil, there is no reason not to go. From the start I have been at every conference for SS. DH usually can't make it and BM doesn't even bother, so I go and report back to them. It's great when step parents can work together with bio parents to actually help the kids involved

[Momma3830]

My step kids live with us. So me & their father are always there. I'm SAHM & he works so if he can't make it, I still go whether the biomom is going or not.

They are with me 90% of the time so I have to be present whether she attends or not. Her BF has never shown up to any of their programs, meetings, conferences, or events. They have been together a good while & is around the kids during her visitation so I don't know the reason behind it.

**I say as long as EVERYONE has good intentions then go ahead. How can it hurt?

[bmw29]

I think that every family should decide that for themselves. There are no rules about what will or won't work.

[LadyFreeRider]

I am a step mother to 3 kids. I do everything with them when it comes to school, doctors appts, shopping for them, everything. I fill out all their paperwork and sign it. I am 100% invovled in every aspect of my step kids' lives. And yes they all live with DH and I and have for 8 years. It took about 3 months after we first got together that I started doing all this. When something happens at school, the school ALWAYS calls me first. They only call DH if they cannot get ahold of me, which has only happened once or twice when I had a landline instead of a cell and wasnt home. I will also add that BM has not been in the kids' lives at all for the last 5, almost 6, years.

[lizzy-k]

They all should go. You could never have to much caring for kids no matter if its step parents or biological.

[PattyNeedham]

Yes, they should go that is great. Means they care. This way they can all be on the same page when it comes to school.

Quoting .betty.white.:

I think its awesome that step parents would want to be that involved and YES they all should go!!