My mother, the narcissist

[hp2011]

My 3yo needs a new bed. My mother has an Avalanche and a Caravan at her disposal and is giving me a hard time about helping me pick one up and I've offered her gas money. 

My 3yo wouldn't need a new bed if she had helped me move the one I bought for him a year ago when we moved. We had to leave it at the old house and now some other little kid is sleeping on it and playing with my son's play Kitchen I got him for Christmas that year because my mother refused to help me move it. I had no one else and no money for a moving truck, but enough to pay her for the gas, she says I should just walk to where it is and carry it home... with my 3yo and my 1mo... yeah, great idea.

This is the same woman who threw not only me, but my 3yo out of her house 2 years ago.

This is the same woman who told me she would help me when I got pregnant with my son and not to have an abortion because she would be there for me.

This is the same woman who allowed her husband to beat me.

This is the same woman who said SHE couldn't deal with MY SO being a control-freak... really?

This is the same woman who left me alone on a witness stand at 14 to testify against my rapist, and made me dress like a slut for court. She wasn't there because she has "other kids" to take care of.

This is the same woman who promised me a bedroom in the house she and my stepfather bought 11 years ago, instead I slept in an unfinished, bug infested, leaky basement and all my stuff got wet and ruined while my siblings had upstairs bedrooms.

UGH. EVERYTHING IS ABOUT HER. SHE ACTS LIKE MY KIDS ARE SUCH AN INCONVENIENCE. SHE IS THEIR GRANDMA, AND I DON'T EXPECT HER TO RAISE THEM, BUT IF I NEED HELP PICKING UP A NEW BED FOR MY SON AND I'M GIVING YOU MONEY TO DO IT, WHY IS IT SUCH A HUGE DEAL? YOU DO NOTHING AT ALL DURING THE DAY BESIDES COLLECT DISABILITY AND SURF THE INTERNET... IS IT THAT BIG OF AN INCONVENIENCE TO DO SOMETHING THAT WILL BENEFIT YOUR GRANDSON?

Rant over.

If I sound like a greedy spoiled bitchy child, sorry you see it that way, because it's not the case.

oh yeah, i almost forgot, she missed the birth of my youngest because when i was dialated at 6 cm, she had a panic attack and "just couldn't be there" and she left and went home and left me with no one but my 16yo sister to help me push and my SO. 

[JustEnjoyLife]

It really is amazing how full grown woman can be so... childish. Sorry for the frustrations. It's so irritating when you have things lined up, but it can't go through. Some people just aren't capable of thinking of anyone else. :\


I hope a friend or something will come through and help you out.  

[Astaroth]

An Avalanche has like, zero room for hauling anything xD


Anyway, she sounds like a horrid bitch. I would help you if I were near!

[hp2011]

lol, it's just a toddler bed. He will need a regular bed soon, but right now he's on an air mattress and it's the cheapest fix for now. Plus my other baby can use it when he gets bigger too.

Quoting Astaroth:

An Avalanche has like, zero room for hauling anything xD


Anyway, she sounds like a horrid bitch. I would help you if I were near!

[yayay15]

I know that grandparents aren't obligated to help us or their grandkids out but, I can't understand some of them act this way.

I know my mom would help me out if I needed it but she won't do anything fun with us. She does not work, she doesn't do anything. I ask her to go to lunch and she gets annoyed at me for even asking.

I refuse to be like that! I will always be there for my kids and will spend as much time as I possibly can with them and their Kids.

[lalalandlady2]

why can't your so carry it to your new place?

[MomTiara19]

Hi,

Trust me I understand what you are talking about.My mil is like this.She is a heartless and shallow woman.

Most people would probably view your post as your being spoiled and ungrateful.

There are groups online for daughters of narcissist if you search google.

You have to give yourself alot of "TLC",focus on your daughter,and dont expect much from your mom.

Your mom is probably incapable of giving you the support you need.

Good Luck,Tia

[coolmommy2x]

How many times are you going to ask her for help before you realize she won't give it? I'm sorry she's so lazy.

[lusyl95]

From what I read, your mother sounds awful! and at some point you need to stop expecting her to do things for you! If you stop expecting her to be there for you, you will never be dissapointed! Besides doing for ourselves feels so much better! Best wishes!

[Bknotnobody]

You can rent a pick up from home depot for 20 bucks or so for an hour. Just an FYI. :-)

[Jewbeesmama]

My mom is horrible too:( I don't know where you live but Uhaul rents regular pick up trucks for about $30 dollars. That way you wouldn't have to ask her for crap. Hope it all works out:)