Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

The CafeMom Newcomers Club The CafeMom Newcomers Club

Apparently giving birth is selfish

Posted by   + Show Post

So I went to a business dinner with my husband that included a few men from his firm and their wives/so to welcome a new partner.  Since I'd never met the new guys wife before myself and some others were making polite conversation and i asked if she had any children.  She replied they had 2 daughters from China and a son from Russia, she showed us a picture from her purse and told us a bit about them.  I mentioned that they were adorable and that my aunt also had a daughter from China, because she couldn't conceive (i was not insinuating that was her issue at al) She said "ohh no no no. I'm fully fertile.  We just feel with so many homeless, starving children in the world it is just very selfish to have children.  There are too many that need good homes and yet people just keep bringing more children in to a world of limited resources.  Its just awful" At this point every person at the table kind of silenced.  Her husband tried to kin of smooth it over and turned it a little sayig like Oh she means you know more people keep having kids they can't care for its so sad.  She cut him right off and said "no I mean no one in general should be creating children when there are so many out there that need help.It's just so selfish and it's so egotistical how people think they have to mark their territory on the world by planting their seed" AWKWARD! 

Listen I get what she is saying and I think adoption is wonderful..but who the hell says having your own kids is selfish and egotistical? Sorry bitch but we have 2 gorgeous children we made and raise and are working on #3..if that makes me a selfish, egotistical resource waster so be it! lol

Her husband who is technically one of my husband's bosses approached everyone  today who was there and personally apologized and said he had hoped his wifes comments did not offend anyone.  My husband of course said no problem at all...but you can bet they all think this chick is a crazy bitch. 

by on Feb. 16, 2012 at 10:07 PM
Replies (11-20):
FooLynRoo
by on Feb. 16, 2012 at 10:19 PM
19 moms liked this

Plenty of crack babies, disabled children , special needs fosters in need of a forever home.

no need to get infants imported

How selfish of her to need a baby.


hautemama83
by Nichole on Feb. 16, 2012 at 10:19 PM
2 moms liked this
Well having children is selfish. I wouldn't say its egotistical though.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
ChloeDolce
by on Feb. 16, 2012 at 10:20 PM
1 mom liked this


Quoting FooLynRoo:

I would have congratulated her but asked her how come she isn't into adopting one of the homeless children in her own country - like the 8 year old less desireablechildren who spend their lives without parents in group homes or shuffled from foster family to foster family - a truly saintly soul would know charity starts at home - and someone truly trying to change the world and give out good would give to those most in need (older orphans)

Excellent point of veiw!!!!!

jb0520
by Silver Member on Feb. 16, 2012 at 10:20 PM
This exactly or just starred.....


Quoting BEXi:

Omg!! I wouldve laughed in shock to be honest.


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
LovingSAHMommy
by on Feb. 16, 2012 at 10:21 PM

Wow. Just wow.

Its.me.Sam.
by Gold Member on Feb. 16, 2012 at 10:21 PM
6 moms liked this

i get what she is saying - and there is a lot of truth to it - she just did it with very little tact lol

malexander2009
by Member on Feb. 16, 2012 at 10:22 PM
1 mom liked this
I wouldn't have been able to compose myself and would have laughed in her face.
Jeni1124
by on Feb. 16, 2012 at 10:23 PM
2 moms liked this
I am probably going to get bashed for this...but I see her point completely. I've always felt that it was kind of selfish to have a biological child when there are so many children that need homes. However...as human beings we are entitled to be selfish from time to time. Our species cannot survive if everyone was 100% selfless at all times. So, my husband and I chose to have one biological child. If someone else wants to have 20 that is fine, but we felt one was right for us. I would love to have another, but it will be through foster/adoption if we do. That choice is NOT right for everyone though...if someone cannot love and accept a foster/adopted child the exact same as a biological child but they CAN provide the unconditional love and support that a child needs to their biological child then that is the right route for them.
sweet.lil.mama
by on Feb. 16, 2012 at 10:23 PM
10 moms liked this
I hate people like that, like its my fault people in 3rd world countries can't wrap it up. I want my kids to look like me...
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
jkleinman
by <3munchkin's mama<3 on Feb. 16, 2012 at 10:23 PM
Wow!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN