Sorry, Kinda long... Spin from drug test post... *** makes me sad and I miss my mom ; (

[AngelNCO]

This is part of why I believe drug testing should be mandatory for Welfare recipients.... Just want to share my story...

 I'm the oldest of 6 and we were all abused by my drug addicted, schizophrenic father. My dad beat me almost on a daily basis along with my brother just youger than me. He's broken my ribs a number of times, the emotional abuse was the worse, the sexual abuse really didn't effect me until later in life. My brother was abused in every way too. He just got out of prison after serving 9 years for molestation of a minor. My brother is now a registered sex offender due to his abuse by my father. My mother was also terribly abused by my father, she finally left him when I was 19, I was so proud of her, unfortunately she started to drink heavily and became a methamphetamine addict who died. She shot her self in the head out in the middle of a heavily wooded canyon where she and her boyfriend had a meth lab and wouldn't you know it the meth lab was right next to my youngest sisters bedroom, she was 9 at the time, my other two brothers also lived there. It wasn't really a house, it was a pallet built shack in the middle of the woods, away from everyone, Schools knew what was going on, they just let it happen anyway, even though it was March 17th, the day my mom took her life, and the kids were only in school 31 days out of the entire year. But nobody bothered with the "Rowland" kids. My husband and I tried our hardest to get those kids, we loved them so much, but they gave them to my abusive, schizophrenic father, who's been arrested a number of times for meth and in and out of mental health facilities, because it would be too tramatic for the kids to move to another state, I'm in MN and they were in CA. I spent 6 years writing letters to social services, probation officers involved with my father, judges involved with my sister, before anyone did anything. My other sister was a heroin addict and she got busted for selling fraudulent banquet tickets and was facing 29 years in prison, her lawyer wanted me to write a letter about our childhood, hoping for a sympathetic judge, so I did. She had to do inpatient chemical dependency TX. In this letter I spoke of all the abuse and FINALLY they took my yougest sister from my father, the damage was already done. I'm sorry, I have no faith in Social Services. I now work in Chemical Dependency helping women who have addictions and I watch all these lives get destroyed and nobody does anything. It makes me sad.  My mom was on welfare when she had her meth addiction/lab...  Could have been different if they required testing.

[AngelNCO]

BUMP!  Ugh... now I'm all sad... Just need to let it go!  What's done is done and she's never coming back. 

[amyrw]

I agree that they should test simply because they could help someone get treatment that they likely wouldn't have sought out on their own.

[jimi2626]

Thank you for sharing your story! My childhood was NOTHING compared to that, because I had an amazing Grandmother who took us in. I also work with women with chemical dependency. I am a CACII and work at an inpatient rehab for women and children. Can I ask what you do? I have just never met anyone on here that works in that field!

[coolmommy2x]

I agree and am so sad for what your family went through.

[AngelNCO]

 Thank you for reading it.  I'm a nurse in the field.  I think you're wonderful for what you do for a living.

Quoting jimi2626:

Thank you for sharing your story! My childhood was NOTHING compared to that, because I had an amazing Grandmother who took us in. I also work with women with chemical dependency. I am a CACII and work at an inpatient rehab for women and children. Can I ask what you do? I have just never met anyone on here that works in that field!

 

[justgracie]

Look at you.  You are an amazing woman.  I'm sorry that your momma didn't get help.  I am so proud of you for becoming an awesome woman on your own.  Losing her was horrible.  Your siblings have hard struggles.  But you and your family are also part of her legacy.

That was a great gift to give her.

[AngelNCO]

 Thank you... I really needed to hear that today.  Her anniversary is coming up and even though it's been 10 years, all these emotions creep up again.  The anger and sadness.  I miss her terribly, before she started using she was such a beautiful person.  I can't help but get angry still because of how she "left" everything.  I watch my siblings struggle with drugs and their lifestyles they've chosen and it makes me soooo sad.  Why can't they just make different choices!  Really, thank you for your kind words... they mean more than you could possibley know.  The tears are flowing right now, but it's a good thing  : )

Quoting justgracie:

Look at you.  You are an amazing woman.  I'm sorry that your momma didn't get help.  I am so proud of you for becoming an awesome woman on your own.  Losing her was horrible.  Your siblings have hard struggles.  But you and your family are also part of her legacy.

That was a great gift to give her.

 

[MrsGuerrero92]

I'm am so sorry. I know how you feel. My oldest sister has been a heroin addict for about 30 years now. When she had my niece she was incarcerated for drugs possession & fraud. My mom had temporary custody of my niece. She was released from jail & she went back to her ways. We reported & reported her to Social Services. 2 years later she had my nephew. The kids were fed & taken care of, thanks to my parents & my other sisters & I. Social services just wouldn't listen. They said as long as they were not abused, she wasn't doing anything hurtful to the kids! SERIOUSLY??? Taking them to drug houses wasn't hurtful & dangerous?? Wow! She finally left the kids with us when they were 9 yrs old & 7 yrs old. I got a call yrs later from a worker telling me my sister had given birth to a baby boy & asked if I could take custody (I honestly thought they had the wrong number lol). I said yes of course! He was born addicted to heroin. I knew dh & I had a lot of work to put into taking care of the baby. Plus we had a 2 year old of our own & I ws pregnant with twins. Once social services found out I was pregnant w/ twins they said I couldn't have custody of him. Too many babies & too much work. I was willing to go through whatever we had to go through. They wouldn't take the kids away from my sister when she was running the streets stealing, selling & using drugs with her kids. & NOW Social Service wanted to "do what's right"??? UGH!! My niece is now 23 & my nephew is 21. My little nephew just turned 14 last month. He was adopted by a family & it was a closed adoption. 4 more yrs & I could start looking for him! & my sister is STILL out on the streets doing what she does best. (She's in her mid 50's & still does the same crap) I haven't spoken to her nor have I seen her in years. I'm glad you're helping others. Where are your little brother & sister now?

[AngelNCO]

 Thank you for sharing your story.. I'm sorry they wouldn't give you your nephew but am grateful for you that they found him a permanent home.  We need more "angel's" like you in this world.  My silblings are still struggling.  After about 3 years of zero communication with them we recently became "friends" on facebook.  It's kind of a catch 22, lol... I get to hear from them but I am forced to see what lifestyle they are living.  I guess I have to take the good with the bad... they're using drugs and making bad choices.  All I can do is pray that they start changing their ways. 

Quoting MrsGuerrero92:

I'm am so sorry. I know how you feel. My oldest sister has been a heroin addict for about 30 years now. When she had my niece she was incarcerated for drugs possession & fraud. My mom had temporary custody of my niece. She was released from jail & she went back to her ways. We reported & reported her to Social Services. 2 years later she had my nephew. The kids were fed & taken care of, thanks to my parents & my other sisters & I. Social services just wouldn't listen. They said as long as they were not abused, she wasn't doing anything hurtful to the kids! SERIOUSLY??? Taking them to drug houses wasn't hurtful & dangerous?? Wow! She finally left the kids with us when they were 9 yrs old & 7 yrs old. I got a call yrs later from a worker telling me my sister had given birth to a baby boy & asked if I could take custody (I honestly thought they had the wrong number lol). I said yes of course! He was born addicted to heroin. I knew dh & I had a lot of work to put into taking care of the baby. Plus we had a 2 year old of our own & I ws pregnant with twins. Once social services found out I was pregnant w/ twins they said I couldn't have custody of him. Too many babies & too much work. I was willing to go through whatever we had to go through. They wouldn't take the kids away from my sister when she was running the streets stealing, selling & using drugs with her kids. & NOW Social Service wanted to "do what's right"??? UGH!! My niece is now 23 & my nephew is 21. My little nephew just turned 14 last month. He was adopted by a family & it was a closed adoption. 4 more yrs & I could start looking for him! & my sister is STILL out on the streets doing what she does best. (She's in her mid 50's & still does the same crap) I haven't spoken to her nor have I seen her in years. I'm glad you're helping others. Where are your little brother & sister now?

 

[MrsGuerrero92]

I'm sorry to hear that. My oldest nephew is also using drugs. From what he says, he only smokes weed. But who knows. They spent a few years in foster homes. My niece also used drugs. She has a 6 month old son. She takes very good care of him. I hope she continues. Their father got out of prison last year. After serving 15 yrs. My sister sent me a friend request on Facebook. I denied it & blocked her. I don't think I could ever forgive her for the life she gave her kids. I know its wrong of me to feel that way. But I can't help it.

Quoting AngelNCO:

 Thank you for sharing your story.. I'm sorry they wouldn't give you your nephew but am grateful for you that they found him a permanent home.  We need more "angel's" like you in this world.  My silblings are still struggling.  After about 3 years of zero communication with them we recently became "friends" on facebook.  It's kind of a catch 22, lol... I get to hear from them but I am forced to see what lifestyle they are living.  I guess I have to take the good with the bad... they're using drugs and making bad choices.  All I can do is pray that they start changing their ways. 

Quoting MrsGuerrero92:

I'm am so sorry. I know how you feel. My oldest sister has been a heroin addict for about 30 years now. When she had my niece she was incarcerated for drugs possession & fraud. My mom had temporary custody of my niece. She was released from jail & she went back to her ways. We reported & reported her to Social Services. 2 years later she had my nephew. The kids were fed & taken care of, thanks to my parents & my other sisters & I. Social services just wouldn't listen. They said as long as they were not abused, she wasn't doing anything hurtful to the kids! SERIOUSLY??? Taking them to drug houses wasn't hurtful & dangerous?? Wow! She finally left the kids with us when they were 9 yrs old & 7 yrs old. I got a call yrs later from a worker telling me my sister had given birth to a baby boy & asked if I could take custody (I honestly thought they had the wrong number lol). I said yes of course! He was born addicted to heroin. I knew dh & I had a lot of work to put into taking care of the baby. Plus we had a 2 year old of our own & I ws pregnant with twins. Once social services found out I was pregnant w/ twins they said I couldn't have custody of him. Too many babies & too much work. I was willing to go through whatever we had to go through. They wouldn't take the kids away from my sister when she was running the streets stealing, selling & using drugs with her kids. & NOW Social Service wanted to "do what's right"??? UGH!! My niece is now 23 & my nephew is 21. My little nephew just turned 14 last month. He was adopted by a family & it was a closed adoption. 4 more yrs & I could start looking for him! & my sister is STILL out on the streets doing what she does best. (She's in her mid 50's & still does the same crap) I haven't spoken to her nor have I seen her in years. I'm glad you're helping others. Where are your little brother & sister now?