a lot of single moms really make me mad.

[kmorales7690]

and here is the reason why, its not because you have a kid without being married, or anything like that, its how you treat these poor dads that just want to have something to do with their kids, and be involved in their lives, if a guy pays his child support every month, and your children are in no danger while they are with them they should have just as much right to their child as you do! last time i checked it took two people to make a child, and why would you want to keep a child away from a father who LOVES them and wants to be involved in their lives, 

[thatgirl70]

I think it can depend on the situation. Maybe they did try, maybe the dad chooses not to have anything to do with the kids? Maybe what he did to her is so horrible that she is protecting them by keeping them away (I know if I was with a guy that had beat me on a regular basis and I finally had the sense to get away, there's no way I would allow him contact with my child(ren)--I don't care if he was the father or not).

I mean sure, if the dad is a great guy and wants to be involved, by all means, he should be. But I just wouldn't lump every single mother together and act like it's their fault alone.

[Mommavieve]

I know a man who does that. My BFF's ex punishes her by keeping their daughter from her if she does something he doesn't like :/

[mama2beautiesnb]

my ss bm is one. cs is always paid, and he is very safe with us. she has told many ppl its cuz he came back to me when they broke up. i have a 6 yr old whos dad cheated on me and he can see her whenever.

Quoting 1likeme:

Hahahaha. AHHH Hahahahaha! So how many single mothers do you know personally who actually do this?

[jillbailey26]

He beat YOU!  What does finding anything out in court have to do with it?

Quoting kisha89:

Had I not found all this out in court just recently I would have never known she would be in danger.

Quoting WifeyC:

OP also said if they aren't in danger....

Quoting kisha89:

Ok but I'm being thrown in a very vague group labeled "single moms" and actually Im mistaken he paid cs 6 times but I didn't see a dime of it. And he claims "to love and want to be in all his kids lives" how was that not directed towards me as a single mother once again?

Quoting jillbailey26:

Quoting kisha89:

My daughters dad molested his oldest son (hospital documented proof) and abused him (YEARS of documented proof at this point) and the whole 3 years he and I were together he cheated and beat me. Damn straight I don't allow that sick piece of trash around MY child. He hasn't paid cs and never will he pays for 3 other kids (they don't see the money either) and up until just recently had no idea that the youngest and another little girl were his (he cheated and knocked up 2 other women while living off of me) with all that being said he is WILLINGLY signing over rights. Which is best for my daughter so my husband can adopt her so I disagree with this entire post :) sometimes it's in the child's best interest to be kept from the "father"

You should probably reread the post.  She said "if a guy pays his child support and your children are in no danger".  Clearly, that's not the case with you.

[snowpeasmom]

Nope, most forms I fill out has single, co-habit/ significant other, divorced, married.

Quoting jillbailey26:

Quoting toopicky429:

I hate when people (men included) claim to be a "single" parent, but live with their SO who also supports them. Just because you are not married doesn't mean you are single. Totally OT. :)

Legally, if you're not married, you're single.

[raegansmom]

Crazy!!! Glad you guys are away from all of that now.

Quoting kisha89:

Bc I had NO idea who he really was and why his other child's mother kept him from his kids. He wasn't that way when we first got together and then the abuse came. It was so hard to give up on him bc of how his dad treated him (beat the HELL out of him an allowed his older brother to molest him for years) so I thought I could change him. Boy was I wrong when I found out I was pregnant tho he had left for his other babies mom (she was a junkie having kids in prison every other year, LITERALLY) and I never questioned anything until his children's moms parents contacted me to appear in court and that's when everything came to light.

Quoting raegansmom:

Why would you get involved with & stay with a man like that to start with?

Quoting kisha89:

My daughters dad molested his oldest son (hospital documented proof) and abused him (YEARS of documented proof at this point) and the whole 3 years he and I were together he cheated and beat me. Damn straight I don't allow that sick piece of trash around MY child. He hasn't paid cs and never will he pays for 3 other kids (they don't see the money either) and up until just recently had no idea that the youngest and another little girl were his (he cheated and knocked up 2 other women while living off of me) with all that being said he is WILLINGLY signing over rights. Which is best for my daughter so my husband can adopt her so I disagree with this entire post :) sometimes it's in the child's best interest to be kept from the "father"

[jillbailey26]

Government (taxes)?

Quoting snowpeasmom:

Nope, most forms I fill out has single, co-habit/ significant other, divorced, married.

Quoting jillbailey26:

Quoting toopicky429:

I hate when people (men included) claim to be a "single" parent, but live with their SO who also supports them. Just because you are not married doesn't mean you are single. Totally OT. :)

Legally, if you're not married, you're single.

[kisha89]

But he was never abusive towards children I have a son from a previous engagement and he NEVER inches acted out in the towards him. I was set on supervised visitation and the courts disagreed an almost allowed joint custody so no, to me this about me and certain aspects of my "single" motherhood. Like he paid those 6 times to get out of jail and not the whole amount enough to prove he was "making the effort" and guess what? Knowing what I now know I'm STILL the bad guy according to his gf who doesn't believe a word of it and to a few others who think "people change" and want me to give him a "chance" with her.

Quoting jillbailey26:

The parts listed in red.  Whether he claims to pay or not, he doesn't.  Whether he claims to love his kids or not, he's abusive.  So again, she's not referring to you.  She's referring to dads who actually pay, who are actually good to their kids and where the mothers have NO reason to keep their kids from them.  You obviously have reasons.

Quoting kisha89:

Ok but I'm being thrown in a very vague group labeled "single moms" and actually Im mistaken he paid cs 6 times but I didn't see a dime of it. And he claims "to love and want to be in all his kids lives" how was that not directed towards me as a single mother once again?

Quoting jillbailey26:

Quoting kisha89:

My daughters dad molested his oldest son (hospital documented proof) and abused him (YEARS of documented proof at this point) and the whole 3 years he and I were together he cheated and beat me. Damn straight I don't allow that sick piece of trash around MY child. He hasn't paid cs and never will he pays for 3 other kids (they don't see the money either) and up until just recently had no idea that the youngest and another little girl were his (he cheated and knocked up 2 other women while living off of me) with all that being said he is WILLINGLY signing over rights. Which is best for my daughter so my husband can adopt her so I disagree with this entire post :) sometimes it's in the child's best interest to be kept from the "father"

You should probably reread the post.  She said "if a guy pays his child support and your children are in no danger".  Clearly, that's not the case with you.

[nikkib01]

Agree

[sabbycat69]

Sorry that he treated u like crap but be the better person and don't do to him what he does to u. Trust me ur child will notice that and know u were the better person

Quoting MamatoKy:

 I'm a single mom, my ex doesnt pay child support, he gets her when its convient for him. So I shouldnt treat him like shit why? He treated me like shit the whole time we were together, its my turn now. And yes, If its not convient for me to let my dd go to his house, then she doesnt go. =)

yes he loves her, yes he wants to be involved in her life, but only when its convient for him.