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ugh i feel stupid

Posted by on Apr. 26, 2012 at 9:59 AM
  • 53 Replies
My daughter made a lot of friends quickly in preschool, then I started to hear about how she was getting hit by other kids all the time and was being told by one girl that she didn't like her. I talked to the teacher and she assured me that when the kids got physical with each other they were told to use words. Eventually my daughter started hitting, kicking, and punching her dad, brother, and I at home. I give her a time out every time, but it seems there is nothing happening at school. I've had endless conversations with my daughter about telling the teacher if some one hits her. We were waiting to get in to class when this little girl "m " got there. My daughter said hi and went in for a hug and got smacked in the face. I saw her totally just shrink. Her posture changed and instead of telling someone, she went and stood by herself. I went and talked to the mom but I realized there is no way my daughter is telling the teacher when this happens.
We were playing yesterday when DD got excited and punched me right in the face. I said "that's it!, you are not allowed to play with "m " "k " or "g" at school anymore. When you are playing I want you to only play with ...and I listed the kids that aren't bullies "
She said okay mommy, and had this look of relief on her face. All this time, I never told her not to play with these kids and she probably thinks she has to. I feel so dumb, I can't believe I never said to not play with these kids before. Smh. She only has 5 days of school left.
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by on Apr. 26, 2012 at 9:59 AM
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Replies (1-10):
LadyStork
by on Apr. 26, 2012 at 10:04 AM
Have YOU talked to the teacher about this after you witnessed that little girl smacking your dd? That's ridiculous.
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KitschyGirl
by on Apr. 26, 2012 at 10:05 AM
Yeah, she basically says she isn't seeing it and my DD isn't telling her when it happens.

Quoting LadyStork:

Have YOU talked to the teacher about this after you witnessed that little girl smacking your dd? That's ridiculous.
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T-Rentsmommy06
by Platinum Member on Apr. 26, 2012 at 10:09 AM
Wow, so even after you (an adult) witnessed it she still wasn't going to do anything about it because she didn't see it and your daughter didn't tell? That is poor teaching. Ugh.

Anyway, it is always the "most obvious" answer that you do not see right off the bat. At least from now on she knows to only be around people who will value her. :)

Quoting KitschyGirl:

Yeah, she basically says she isn't seeing it and my DD isn't telling her when it happens.

Quoting LadyStork:

Have YOU talked to the teacher about this after you witnessed that little girl smacking your dd? That's ridiculous.


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Elayna90
by Platinum Member on Apr. 26, 2012 at 10:10 AM
I am having a similar problem with my DS and it is so sad. He has to go until June 30. Next time he tells me about something I am going to try telling him he doesn't have to play with them and see how that goes.
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deloit
by Bronze Member on Apr. 26, 2012 at 10:13 AM
8 moms liked this
i have 3 boys and some people think its wrong but i have taught them don't hit first but if someone hits u then knock the hell out of em.
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KitschyGirl
by on Apr. 26, 2012 at 10:14 AM
I think the teacher is taking it on a case by case basis, Idk. They weren't in school when m smacked her. The mom made her give my daughter a half ass apology and a hug but really all this hitting, kicking, and punching pisses me off. My daughter never behaved like that until she learned it at school and now it's become habitual. She's doing it without even thinking about it. I can't wait for school to be out.

Quoting T-Rentsmommy06:

Wow, so even after you (an adult) witnessed it she still wasn't going to do anything about it because she didn't see it and your daughter didn't tell? That is poor teaching. Ugh.

Anyway, it is always the "most obvious" answer that you do not see right off the bat. At least from now on she knows to only be around people who will value her. :)


Quoting KitschyGirl:

Yeah, she basically says she isn't seeing it and my DD isn't telling her when it happens.

Quoting LadyStork:

Have YOU talked to the teacher about this after you witnessed that little girl smacking your dd? That's ridiculous.



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KitschyGirl
by on Apr. 26, 2012 at 10:16 AM
I couldn't believe the look on her face. I didn't just say you don't have to, I said she wasn't allowed to. She looked so relieved. She has school today and I'm going to tell the teacher about it again. I just want my little girl back and I'm tired of her getting pummeled.

Quoting Elayna90:

I am having a similar problem with my DS and it is so sad. He has to go until June 30. Next time he tells me about something I am going to try telling him he doesn't have to play with them and see how that goes.
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KitschyGirl
by on Apr. 26, 2012 at 10:17 AM
No judgement from me, but that's not for us.

Quoting deloit:

i have 3 boys and some people think its wrong but i have taught them don't hit first but if someone hits u then knock the hell out of em.
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mistie900
by Platinum Member on Apr. 26, 2012 at 10:17 AM
1 mom liked this
That's sad. At my kids preschool if a kid gets hit they are told to tell the other kid they don't like that. The teacher doesn't do anything about it. IMO they are encouraging my kids to not tattle and I don't like that. My daughter has told me that she was hit and all the teacher did was tell her to tell the other kid that she doesn't like it. Really? I don't see how this helps them. I don't worry so much about my dd because she is tough and very independent, but I worry about my son who is sensitive. I doubt my daughter will ever really be bullied but my son is a different story.
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Mackenzie40
by Platinum Member on Apr. 26, 2012 at 10:17 AM
Ahhhh , when I read that you saw relief on her face I felt a tug on my heart. I dont know if I would have told mine that they dont have to play with these kids either , I doubt it would even have entered my mind since it seems a given kwim? But obviously its not . So glad you gave her permission and i hope in the future she'll know she doesnt have to play with mean kids.
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