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You may THINK your child is well behaved but he is actually a brat!

 This is what I think about the majority of children that I come into contact with.  I dont understand why parents allow their children to: talk back, run around touching everything, argue with the parent, whine, throw temper tantrums, scream and cry to get their way, and just basically be rude little urchins.  I have five children that have been taught that you dont tlak back to an adult, you dont dare act up in public, you may ask for something once and I will either say yes or no but you may not whine, beg, or argue over my answer.  I dont care what type of discipline parents use but they need to be consistent.  I hate standing in line somewhere and listening to a parent/child argue about whether the kid is getting candy or not and then finally the parent will say " Well if you will be good the rest of the day you can have the candy" 

     WTH?  I dont bribe my children to behave I demand it...and lord help the child of mine that tells me no or dares to yell at me.  Please people wake up and realize children are not small adults they do not deserve the same treatment, respect, or privaledges adults do.  So why do you allow your child to misbehave? 

 

by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 11:03 AM
Replies (181-190):
boysmom5
by Bronze Member on May. 1, 2012 at 7:06 AM
I so agree with this. Kids try to push the limits, that's normal. They need to know that certain behavior is unacceptable each and every time no matter what. Most of the time a child's behavior directly reflects on the parents. My kids know there are consequences to their actions. If they act like fools out in public they know what's going to happen and it's not good.
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Aspiemom0203
by on May. 1, 2012 at 7:23 AM
I agree with you 100%! Never found a boss who allowed tantrums. It's called patenting. Don't be their buddy. I don't need to spank, they already know my rules. I list them off in the am. And yes they love me, not because they have to. My 19 DS still calls daily, even after all the rules I set.
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chantismom
by on May. 1, 2012 at 8:30 AM

I came from a very strict upbringing and after we were school age, we didn't do anything in public other than what my mom said because we feared her. You can't love something you fear.  I respect my child and ask her to respect me. She's not always perfect (but who is?) and at times I choose to pick my battles as mentioned above.  I am raising a child that I hope will go out and do good things in the world and not some min-soldier who does nothing but obey others. Especially as a girl I want her to question things, ask why.... I'm constantly told by teachers and Sundayschool folks, and GS leaders that she is so good. But when she's with me she acts out and I've been told by both her pediatrician and her school that means I'm doing a good job because she feels secure and loved enough that she can act that way and I won't stop loving her. 

mom2ljh
by on May. 1, 2012 at 8:34 AM
I absolutely disagree 100% with your last statement. ALL people deserve respect.
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Bianca008
by on May. 1, 2012 at 8:42 AM

Sounds like you parent with fear of consequences. Whatever works for you : )

We parented with bribery and have quite charming men now.

teaching_mama
by on May. 1, 2012 at 8:57 AM
My dd is well behaved for the most part. But she is 4 so sometimes she misbehaves, throws a fit when she doesn't get her way, or does things I don't like. But I allow her to make mistakes and then offer a more appropriate choice of behavior. Because making mistakes is how we learn. And sometimes those mistakes happen in public! And sometimes she has a bad day or moment just like I do. There are days when I feel like screaming but as an adult I have more control over my emotions than a 4 year old. So yes, sometimes my dd does throw a tantrum in public, but she's not perfect and I don't expect her to be. I also treat her with respect, because even though she's a child she deserves to be treated like a person!
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TugBoatMama
by on May. 1, 2012 at 9:02 AM
I always get compliments on how good my kids are but even they have their days when they are just little terrors.
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sheena696
by Platinum Member on May. 1, 2012 at 9:05 AM

I happen to have very well behaved children. Especially my son. I've had his teacher come up to me and ask if he ever gets in trouble at home because he is so well behaved at school. Do my kids have their moments? Of course, they are kids and it would be ridiculous to expect them to be perfect 24/7. 

Oh wow..I didn't fully read the last part of the post..now that I have *gag*...

Mom2Just1
by Silver Member on May. 1, 2012 at 9:38 AM

Whatever.  My son is almost 6 years old and he has a mind of his own. He has opinions, thoughts, and feelings.  I respect him immensely because he deserves that from his parents.  He is respectful, has manners, a good student, and overall he is a good kid.  He has his moments.  We all have bad days.  I am not raising a robot.  I know at the end of the day my son will not give into peer pressure.  He is stubborn, a strong willed child, and at times he feels very strongly about something.  He has a voice in this family.  We listen to his side and come to a compromise.  

For example:  Everyday he packs his lunch.  Today he wanted to buy a tray.  We compromised.  He can buy a tray this one time.  He has to have regular milk and make sure to eat the healthy food first.  I know he will because we have taught him this.  

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ladyraven16
by Platinum Member on May. 1, 2012 at 9:46 AM
I have one angel and one devil. It is what it is. I do my best but I get ugly looks from people who expect perfection. People don't understand what is really going on with my son, they just assume he is a brat because he looks and sounds normal. I've gotten used to it though.

ETA- My 5yr old is an angel. I'm constantly complimented on how well behaved, polite, friendly, and thoughtful he is. No one that meets us in public would even suspect the he has an extreme anger problem, he argues with me on a regular basis, and he screams when he gets frustrated. Lol he is just excellent for everyone but me.
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