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You're not going through anything THAT bad if you can be posting on CM....

Posted by   + Show Post

I've seen this sooo many times.

A CM member is experiencing something difficult, even life changing and someone pipes up with...

"If that happened to me the last thing I'd be doing is posting on CM"


 "So this and this happened and instead of being with your loved ones you're posting on a mom website? I call BS."

Something along those lines. Its ridiculous. Why shouldn't someone be able to come here for support? advice? vent? isn't that what this site is intended for in the first place?

If something life altering happens to me,  that doesn't mean my friends IRL lives stop. They still have jobs, kids, responsibilities to tend to, There's always someone here on CM with some kind of experience and /or support they are able to give.


So please, explain the logic to me if youre one of the lovely few that spew that BS when someone posts about a difficult time in their personal life, since apparently this website is only for the trivial things...


by on May. 1, 2012 at 12:12 PM
Replies (31-40):
by on May. 1, 2012 at 12:35 PM

No, it's not wrong for others, if that's what they want to do. That's why I said I wouldn't say that; however, I have not had the urge to come here to vent. I close myself off; that's just how I work. I don't judge how others deal!

Quoting .shank.:


Is it wrong that others would be here?

What about the situations explained in this post? Some don't have any friends irl.

Quoting abbysmommy429:

I would never say that, but CM is the last place that I would be if I were experiencing something major.

by on May. 1, 2012 at 12:36 PM
That doesn't really make ssense to me either.

What is the appropriate time limit to ask for advice or vent?

There was a member that posted when her husband passed away. She posted before she even knew for sure that he was gone, BC she just knew. All she could do was wait. Wait for someone to confirm her worst nightmare.

What should she have been doing?

Quoting Mommy2BeAmy:

Well, if something happened to me thats bothersome I will post about it...sometimes blogging and so on can be looked at as a healing some people keep diaries, others talk to shrinks some people post on CM...

I feel if something happened MINUTES ago yeah its alittle strange you're on here posting when obviously your priorities should be alittle different at the moment..

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on May. 1, 2012 at 12:36 PM

i agree specially does who bash mamas on labor. I wish i had dm mobile when i had dd. It was just So and me at 3am in labor it would of been nice to take my mind of the extreme pain with drama or support

Any likes are greatly appreciated....TY :)

by on May. 1, 2012 at 12:36 PM

Yup. I agree. I've come on CM & talked to my ladies after a rough patch in my life.

by Bronze Member on May. 1, 2012 at 12:36 PM
Yeah I love May babies 2012!!!!

Quoting Mrs_Szontagh:

oh yeah? i've yet to find a really good one... except my december babies 2012 group <3 

Quoting samirahk:

Lol not all groups

Quoting MissTacoBell:

Because CM is no longer a place of's been hijacked by trolls

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by Platinum Member on May. 1, 2012 at 12:37 PM

i don't have very many friends in rl because most of them moved away. i have ra and a special needs dd so i don't get out much. i don't have parents or much family at all and we are not close to my dh family. so if i was going through something bad i might come on cafemom to talk about it because i don't have very many ppl in rl. it makes me feel like a loser but there you have it. although i'd probably post in confessions under anon cause i know how the ladies can be in newcomers. lol

by Gold Member on May. 1, 2012 at 12:39 PM
I agree. I went to one of my groups when things were going on with my sister. I can only talk to my family and husband so much. They were also going through what I was. I needed some outside advice and support since my family was already going through enough. Sometimes cm is the place you need to be.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on May. 1, 2012 at 12:40 PM
2 moms liked this
I couldn't imagine being in the ER with my kid and choose to play on the internet instead of tending to them.
Yeah, yeah, I get it, you're waiting, there's 'nothing else to do'. Well, what did people do before the internet? They looked for support from people who truly care, not empty support from strangers. We're conditioning ourselves to feel worthy and cared about by the number of 'likes' we get. Likes don't cure cancer and virtual hugs won't make everything better. There is something disconcerting about the way we're becoming so disassociated with reality and true emotion.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on May. 1, 2012 at 12:40 PM
1 mom liked this

sorry but if you are in the middle of a crisis and you are online on cafemom you have lost all perspective and sense of priorities. there is a time for asking for advice and a time for getting on with real life and dealing with the crisis not posting on cafemom. 

by on May. 1, 2012 at 12:42 PM

I have real, live wonderful people in my life to use for support - I don't need to shout my horrors to unknowns.

BUT - sometimes talking to strangers freely w/o worry that it'll get back to 'whoever' is a NICE thing.

AND - some women have very few friends they can rely on. Some women actually don't have any close friends and have bad relations with their family. So, this is a shelter of sorts to reach out and be comforted.

But, I still think it's SO NOT ME to come online and discuss my private life in detail. I just don't do that; but others, this is all they've got.

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