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I know im wrong but im taking my moms drinking

Posted by on May. 3, 2012 at 5:43 PM
  • 17 Replies
Personally. I realize that my mom lost my sister 2yrs ago to cancer. I have no clue the pain of losing a child. But what about me? I'm her daughter as well can the pain of losing one child. Out weigh the love for another. My mom says she has no reason to live bc the grief is to much for her. Doesn't help my bil married like 6 mnths after my sister passed away. I'm so depressed right now. Which makes me a shitty mom bc I'm having a hard time engaging my son. So then wht the pain of my mom wasting away out weighs the love I have for my child. No! I'm just really alone in this. My other sister who doesn't talk to my mom bc her drinking problem when we were kids. If she knew mom was drinking or my dad they would say I told u so. God forbid my mom overdoeses. I'm going to have to tell my other sister how our mom died. I wont get support. I will get we told u so. Fucking a life really hurts right now .thnks for listening
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by on May. 3, 2012 at 5:43 PM
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Replies (1-10):
huntersmama711
by Gold Member on May. 3, 2012 at 5:47 PM
I'm sorry for the pain you're in. Speaking as a mom who has lost a child another child does not negate the pain of the loss. There is nothing worse than having to bury your child, regardless of age. I wish your mom could see past that pain some to realize she has you still. Just keep being there for her. (((((HUGS)))))
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PookaboosMom
by on May. 3, 2012 at 5:50 PM
Sorry for your loss. I really don't know what else to say. Sorry :(

((((Hugs))))
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Red227
by on May. 3, 2012 at 5:51 PM

Your mother's sorrow regarding the death of your sister has nothing to do with how she feels about you.

Grief is singular and all-encompassing.

You shouldn't take what she does personally.

I know you want her to lift herself out of this and LIVE for you and the remaining children. I can't imagine the helplessness and sorrow you feel.

I wish I had perfect words to make your own pain lessen.

All you can do is LEARN from this; to be the kind of mother yours isn't - and raise your son to be a child who never has to feel what you are feeling. That is the only consolation I can give.

Rydersmommy616
by Crazy on May. 3, 2012 at 5:51 PM
Thank you for your kind words and wisdom. The human heart is not meant to deal with burrying a child. So sad. :( my heart is so heavy just thinking abt it. I'm sorry for your loss and your strenght gives me strenght thank u again


Quoting huntersmama711:

I'm sorry for the pain you're in. Speaking as a mom who has lost a child another child does not negate the pain of the loss. There is nothing worse than having to bury your child, regardless of age. I wish your mom could see past that pain some to realize she has you still. Just keep being there for her. (((((HUGS)))))

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alreadydidthis
by on May. 3, 2012 at 5:54 PM
(((((hugs))))) i hope things work out for you.
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Rydersmommy616
by Crazy on May. 3, 2012 at 5:55 PM
Thank you. U know whts the hardest part I feel guilty for beng happy when my mom is so sad. Like I'm understating the loss of my mom. But on the other hand I feel like I can control my mom. But I can control wht can of mom I am. My son doesn't understand why I'm sad. Thank u for your insightful words


Quoting Red227:

Your mother's sorrow regarding the death of your sister has nothing to do with how she feels about you.

Grief is singular and all-encompassing.

You shouldn't take what she does personally.

I know you want her to lift herself out of this and LIVE for you and the remaining children. I can't imagine the helplessness and sorrow you feel.

I wish I had perfect words to make your own pain lessen.

All you can do is LEARN from this; to be the kind of mother yours isn't - and raise your son to be a child who never has to feel what you are feeling. That is the only consolation I can give.


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Mrs.Winchester
by on May. 3, 2012 at 5:59 PM

I couldn't have said this better myself.

I think you should talk to your mother.  Tell her that you think she needs to seek outside help,  and how hurt you are that she is not trying to get better for you and your sister and your children. 

Quoting Red227:

Your mother's sorrow regarding the death of your sister has nothing to do with how she feels about you.

Grief is singular and all-encompassing.

You shouldn't take what she does personally.

I know you want her to lift herself out of this and LIVE for you and the remaining children. I can't imagine the helplessness and sorrow you feel.

I wish I had perfect words to make your own pain lessen.

All you can do is LEARN from this; to be the kind of mother yours isn't - and raise your son to be a child who never has to feel what you are feeling. That is the only consolation I can give.


Rydersmommy616
by Crazy on May. 3, 2012 at 5:59 PM
Thank you. I just need to knw I'm not alone and I appreciate everone talking to me. Bc talking abt it does help.


Quoting PookaboosMom:

Sorry for your loss. I really don't know what else to say. Sorry :(



((((Hugs))))

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Red227
by on May. 3, 2012 at 5:59 PM

Life is for the LIVING.

To laugh when you feel happy is what would make your sister the happiest, right?

Do you think it's a good legacy to give your sister's memory, being horrifically depressed and not having fun and turning sullen and angry and to drugs and alcohol to dull your pain?

No, that is a horrible way to honor your sister.

You honor her by learning to laugh again and taking joy in the small things - things that she cannot experience any more.

A life not lived isn't a life at all - but a shadow.

Don't be a shadow.

And tell your mother you will never be a shadow either.

Quoting Rydersmommy616:

Thank you. U know whts the hardest part I feel guilty for beng happy when my mom is so sad. Like I'm understating the loss of my mom. But on the other hand I feel like I can control my mom. But I can control wht can of mom I am. My son doesn't understand why I'm sad. Thank u for your insightful words


Quoting Red227:

Your mother's sorrow regarding the death of your sister has nothing to do with how she feels about you.

Grief is singular and all-encompassing.

You shouldn't take what she does personally.

I know you want her to lift herself out of this and LIVE for you and the remaining children. I can't imagine the helplessness and sorrow you feel.

I wish I had perfect words to make your own pain lessen.

All you can do is LEARN from this; to be the kind of mother yours isn't - and raise your son to be a child who never has to feel what you are feeling. That is the only consolation I can give.



coolmommy2x
by Ruby Member on May. 3, 2012 at 5:59 PM
Perhaps counseling would help you both. I'm sorry for what you're going through.
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