Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

The CafeMom Newcomers Club The CafeMom Newcomers Club

So just a curiousity question..more and more people i know that are dating constantly call each other husband and wife, when they are not.  My bf and I have been together for 2 years, live together and I'm pregnant with his first child however he is not my husband! not yet anyway lol I guess it's mostly on FB I see this.  My cousins bf just said something this morning on FB about his "wife", and they are in no way married.  They aren't the only ones I've noticed doing this sooo is this the new normal thing or do I just know some weird people?? lol

by on May. 3, 2012 at 5:58 PM
Replies (321-330):
alwayskk
by on May. 7, 2012 at 7:47 AM

I think it's weird. My ex husband and I were living together, had a child together, and were planning on getting marries, but I didn't call him my husband until he was my husband.

Jadegirl1819
by on May. 7, 2012 at 8:06 AM

Same here.  There are just so many people who play house now.  I just think they are embarassed that they live with and have kids with someone they aren't married to. 

Quoting CreziaMommyTo2:

It annoys me to no end... but it has become more and more the norm for boy friends and girl friends to call each other husband or wife.

 

MrsDrewsMom
by on May. 7, 2012 at 9:00 AM

i agree that it is totally annoying. my cousin's gf calls him her husband all the time and they are not married. in fact she confused a lot of people when he proposed and she announced it on fb. a lot of her friends were like i thought yall were already married.

Aspirel
by on May. 7, 2012 at 9:04 AM
1 mom liked this

I have been with mine for 27 years,only 8 of those we have been legally married. He felt like my husband long before we married.Same for him regarding me. We never really felt the need to get it official since this is a common law state. One day though I think we were both smoking too much crack and decided to have a huge wedding...and here we are now.


(Kidding about the crack...dont call cps on me)

Mommy_Burge
by on May. 7, 2012 at 9:11 AM
1 mom liked this

 I called my husband my "husband" before we were officially married. We tossed around the idea of an actual wedding or just going to the courthouse for a while. We ended up just going one day in 2010 and getting things finalized.

I personally think that it doesn't matter....unless you've been with the "hubby" or "wifey" only a couple of weeks (gag lol) i dont see the issue in it.

gay couples that can't get legally married in all states still call each other husbands and wifes so whats the difference? should they just say "bf or gf" for the rest of their life because they can't legally get married? no. i dont know why it annoys so many people. most (not all) of the people i know that use those terms without actually being married are in a committed long term relationship, more often than not with children or TTC and just haven't signed marriage papers yet or just dont want to do the whole marriage thing. it's a peice of paper.

i wish people would get their panties out of their asses when it comes to this subject. lol. i mean....it's not like everyone that does this is a 15 year old who's been dating someone for 4 minutes and goes "OMG my husband is the best ever! my hubby! yay yay yay!" (blech)

Mommy_Burge
by on May. 7, 2012 at 9:13 AM

 Lmao about the crack! :D

OUr state is common law too. i think after...6 months? maybe less actually. ooohhh no.... 6weeks i think in texas if you live with someone you are considered common law and all the property in your house then belongs also to the other person. yep. saw my mom go through this with her CRAZY ex. O_O

Quoting Aspirel:

I have been with mine for 27 years,only 8 of those we have been legally married. He felt like my husband long before we married.Same for him regarding me. We never really felt the need to get it official since this is a common law state. One day though I think we were both smoking too much crack and decided to have a huge wedding...and here we are now.

 

(Kidding about the crack...dont call cps on me)

 

3greatkids751
by on May. 7, 2012 at 9:14 AM
Lol I hate it too.. Maybe they just like the "thought" but don't wanna go do the paperwork or like what the whole marriage seen entails.. I already made up my mind, if dh and I somehow don't work out I'll never remarry EVER!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
MamaG14
by on May. 7, 2012 at 9:17 AM
1 mom liked this

Conservatives hate change, and so it's so surprise why some folks are annoyed by this. 

Social trends are changing, more people are living together for extended periods of time (even lifetimes) without the marriage certificate. They may even have other legal contracts to protect them in case of illness or death. They may both have their names on titles, deeds, what have you. 

People are adapting the term 'wife' or 'husband' to their life situation- what I've heard lawyers call 'holding eachother out at husband and wife', the basic tenet of common-law marriage. Well, some states do not have such laws on the books anymore, and some of us are perterbed by trends in divorce rates, or for whatever reason, do not want to get married. 

Yeah, kids will do it too, like they always have, and you're just hip to it now that you're on Facebook. It's not going away anytime soon. 

nomadbrat83
by Platinum Member on May. 7, 2012 at 9:27 AM
Me too

Quoting el_dj_mom:

ty!! I really hate to admit some so trivial annoys me to no end..but it does lol so glad I'm not the only one :)


Quoting CreziaMommyTo2:

It annoys me to no end... but it has become more and more the norm for boy friends and girl friends to call each other husband or wife.


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
owl0210
by on May. 7, 2012 at 9:28 AM
I don't understand it either, my ex-husband wasn't my husband until we got married.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)