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Awkward trip to the OB/GYN maybe tmi

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I dread the OB/GYN. I mean who liked it. I get anxiety attacks sitting in the room draped in paper waiting for the awkwardness.

Last visit I had the female MD, that was 2 years ago. Today I had the male MD and though I'm not really gender biased I've had male MDs before but today was weird.

First off. When he does his initial assessment he touched my stomach with his open palm and gives it a jiggle and says "I need to get you to exercise!".

Then he sits on the table behind me and started feeling my lymph nodes. He then whispers "that's a good girl" and tugs on my ponytail and gave my shoulders a rub.

Then comes the part I hate. The PAP. He's like "let's have a lay down. Be a good girl, relax and open your legs up nice and wide." Reluctantly I comply, weirded out and anxious over the whole stupid exam.

And then he checks my cervix and I hate it. He's like "atta girl, deep breath in and out...just like that. That's my girl."

I'm sure I'm over reacting...but I felt violated and just completely irked afterwards. I've never felt that way before after an OB appt and I've had 2 kids.

So I'm just wondering if this sounded a bit off...or am I just being crazy. I am sure he was just trying to be nice and comforting and I took it the wrong way. I am not accusing him of sexually harassing me or anything I just would prefer a little bit more professionalism and distance.
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by on May. 4, 2012 at 1:10 AM
Replies (71-80):
by on May. 4, 2012 at 7:02 AM

I have a male doctor, but his female nurse always does that PAP...and is always in the room when he is in there...what you went through needs to be reported!!

by on May. 4, 2012 at 7:07 AM

I think he senced your tension. Perhaps, having a list of questions can ease your tension in the future. That keeps them on their professional toes. You're the boss!

by on May. 4, 2012 at 7:10 AM
That's too weird for my taste and very unprofessional
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by on May. 4, 2012 at 7:12 AM
Um, this is why I always bring dh OR mil with me to appts like these. Report this Dr. What a weirdo!
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by on May. 4, 2012 at 7:13 AM
Um no
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by on May. 4, 2012 at 7:14 AM
Yeah that's really wierd I would have been super uncomfortable! Wasn't there a nurse in the room when he checked you? Was he super old or something?
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by on May. 4, 2012 at 7:15 AM

Quoting Tommyskitty:

O.o Totally not professional. I'd think about reporting him if that happened to me.
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by on May. 4, 2012 at 7:17 AM
In my state they ask if you want a nurse or not. Usually I think anyways.

Quoting thatgirl70:

That would make me feel awkward as well, and I can't deal with having a male ob-gyn. You don't mention that he had a nurse with him and as far as I'm aware they are legally required to have one in the room when they do the pap. 

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by on May. 4, 2012 at 7:21 AM

I had a male GYN for YEARS - I loved him (he delivered my sons and I stayed with his practice until he moved out of state a few years ago).  I knew him outside of the office as well....but he was ALWAYS professional in the office.

I would be very creeped out by a doctor (male or female) talking to me like that.  I would have told him to stop after the first 'my girl' comment.
Also - I never am examined by a GYN without another person in the room (male or female GYN).  Around here - even a male GP will not be alone in a room with a patient if the exam will be 'invasive' (require touching anything but the back and listening to a heartbeat through the shirt on the chest). 

by on May. 4, 2012 at 9:53 AM
LOL well I've definitely seen stranger things made up on here.

I'm not sure if its actual law. I believe its more of a protocol, to protect the Dr and patient.
Quoting 4everJs:

Kind of a strange thing for me to make up on a whim don't ya think?

I'm a nurse and I've never heard of that law. I've also never had another nurse with me during an obgyn appointment ever. That I'm sure of.

Quoting hautemama83:

I'm gunna be honest and say I have a hard time believing this is even true.

But if it is, you need to report ASAP. You felt violated, because you were. Also I've never had a pap done without a nurse present.

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