Taking away birthday festivities? Too harsh? Suggestions?
My son will be five on May 8th. For the past 2 years we've had a lot of issues with him and his behavior. He has seen councelors off & on over the past year & they have all agreed that a lot of his anger/behavior stems from his father being gone so long. His dad and I live together, have been together for nearly six years. But he is active duty Air Force and is TDY at least 200 days out of the year.
I do NOT want to use that as an excuse. Does he miss daddy? Sure. BUT he is old enough to know right from wrong. Yet EVERY SINGLE DAY we have issues at daycare. Screaming 'No!" over & over again when he is asked to do something he doesnt want. He'll randomly snap & start throwing toys, knocking over chairs, trying to run out of the classroom. Without any reason or warning he'll just start up & do these things.
Well, he ran out of the classroom twice today (they said he just snapped, they couldn't pin point a trigger) so he got sent home, which means I had to be replaced (I work at the same daycare). I understand its a safety issue & I'm not upset with the daycare. I'm just so upset with him.
So I'm so upset that Im tempted to take away his birthday party. I ordered 24 cupcakes (Transformers, his favorite) for Tuesday. But I'm seriously thinking about canceling the order & telling him he should have listened better. Is that too harsh? I HATE doing that, but I just dont know what to do to get through to him.
I have an appointment on May 11th for him to see his doctor for his five year check up & I'm going to see if she'll give us a recommendation to see a therapist. I'm just at my wits end. Spanking doesn't work, taking away games, tv, toys doesn't work. I just dont know what to do. Right now he is sitting in the hallway doing Pre-K paper work until I get his room cleaned out. Then he'll just have his bed & one pillow & one blanket and his work books.
His dad deploys this month. I dont even know how I'm going to handle him being gone for months when Elijah cant even behave when he is gone for a week or two. :/ Btw, I'm going to see my doctor about seeing a therapist as well.