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 Well, I know there is a bit of a stigma that goes with having STDs and still being able to go out there and date, but is it really dealbreaker? Shouldn't that person be able to love someone and the receive love for who they are and not what they have? I have genital herpes and I didn't find out til after I was married. Guess you can say by then (since I found out during pregnancy) that it was "too late", but I really honestly never knew that I  had it till then. Hubby loves me still and we deal with it the best way we can. But had I known previous to marriage, I wonder what would've come of it had I told him then....truth is, a high precentage of Americans here have some sort of std, and many of them have herpes, hpv, and even HIV.

Is it a dealbreaker for you? What if you are with the guy and you already love him, he was honest about it...would you still love him and be there?

by on May. 4, 2012 at 10:12 PM
Replies (51-60):
prettygirl326
by Bronze Member on May. 4, 2012 at 10:59 PM

 um actually i was diagnose with HPV and HSV. you can't cure eithe one. for one, she said that she got it from a kiss (sounds like herpes to me) as you can't get HPV like that. second, you take meds for HSV not HPV. you can go to the doc and find that you are ok, because HPV can correct itself depending on the strain. I have the one that causes cancer...i was abnormal right before and during pregnancy, but once i had the baby, my pap was normal...for now. So i think she got them mixed up...

Quoting spastic_poodle:

She's talking about hpv, you're talking about HSV (herpes.) That's why hers was curable. Yours is not.

Though some people do seem to be immune to the disease.


Quoting prettygirl326:

 wtf i have never heard of that...so you are just a carrier? i might be too...my hubby has never had an outbreak in the three years we have been together and i am so jealous. i get them, but they are more like little splits and tears, not blisters.


Quoting Ashley_Carlson:


Just a note: My strain is treatable and sometimes curable. So I can't transmit it as long as I don't get all lovey dovey while I'm having an outbreak. I haven't had an outbreak in 10 months and my last test came back negative. My doc is going to test me again and if that comes back negative, then I'm finally cured! :D


Quoting Ashley_Carlson:


I have HPV due to a sexual assault. The SOB kissed me, that's all it took. I'm still very bitter about it. I get sores inside my mouth frequently because of it. I told my SO before we even officially got together and he said he didn't care. Now he's turned it against me and is taunting me for it. That SOB's ass is on the curb the moment I find a job.




 


 

TummyTurner
by on May. 4, 2012 at 11:01 PM
1 mom liked this
Oh jeez. HPV and HSV are two totally different things. My goodness.

Quoting prettygirl326:

 um both are the same..actually i am not sure if she meant HPV or HSV lol but HSV, herpes simplex virus...there are a few forms. HSV-1 and HSV-2 are both the more known forms. you can have both. hsv-1 causes cold sores and the latter, genital blisters, sores, or tears.  


Quoting TummyTurner:


HPV or cold sores? Like the herpes virus?


Quoting Ashley_Carlson:


I have HPV due to a sexual assault. The SOB kissed me, that's all it took. I'm still very bitter about it. I get sores inside my mouth frequently because of it. I told my SO before we even officially got together and he said he didn't care. Now he's turned it against me and is taunting me for it. That SOB's ass is on the curb the moment I find a job.




 

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davnrori
by on May. 4, 2012 at 11:02 PM

No, I wouldn't want to be with anyone who had an STD. While it may be true that many people currently have or have had some kind of STD, I haven't and neither has DH. I would never sleep with someone I knew had some kind of sexual disease. It would be harder if I was in love with the person and then found out but as time, and our marriage, went on, I know I would find myself resenting him. When I'm with DH in "that" way it's awesome because we can be free and open with each other. We don't have to worry about anything. We don't have to use condoms or other protections because we know we're safe. If I knew that for the rest of my life I would have to be on guard against sex with my husband- it would totally kill our sexlife.

spastic_poodle
by on May. 4, 2012 at 11:02 PM
*ummmm* you didn't tell us that so ummmm how was I supposed to know you have hpv too and were taking about that ummmm?


Quoting prettygirl326:

 um actually i was diagnose with HPV and HSV. you can't cure eithe one. for one, she said that she got it from a kiss (sounds like herpes to me) as you can't get HPV like that. second, you take meds for HSV not HPV. you can go to the doc and find that you are ok, because HPV can correct itself depending on the strain. I have the one that causes cancer...i was abnormal right before and during pregnancy, but once i had the baby, my pap was normal...for now. So i think she got them mixed up...


Quoting spastic_poodle:

She's talking about hpv, you're talking about HSV (herpes.) That's why hers was curable. Yours is not.

Though some people do seem to be immune to the disease.



Quoting prettygirl326:


 wtf i have never heard of that...so you are just a carrier? i might be too...my hubby has never had an outbreak in the three years we have been together and i am so jealous. i get them, but they are more like little splits and tears, not blisters.



Quoting Ashley_Carlson:



Just a note: My strain is treatable and sometimes curable. So I can't transmit it as long as I don't get all lovey dovey while I'm having an outbreak. I haven't had an outbreak in 10 months and my last test came back negative. My doc is going to test me again and if that comes back negative, then I'm finally cured! :D



Quoting Ashley_Carlson:



I have HPV due to a sexual assault. The SOB kissed me, that's all it took. I'm still very bitter about it. I get sores inside my mouth frequently because of it. I told my SO before we even officially got together and he said he didn't care. Now he's turned it against me and is taunting me for it. That SOB's ass is on the curb the moment I find a job.






 



 


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bry36
by on May. 4, 2012 at 11:03 PM
I think HIV I could love them but not be sexual with that person but anything else I could deal and be ok with I have a very good friend who has Herpes and My heart broke for her because she had gotten them from her ex husband who cheated on her she did nothing wrong and still had to deal with after math of that and I just remember her crying and saying she was damaged and nobody could ever touch her again how fair is that ??? And she has never gotten them on her vag she gets them on her tummy and bottom as now takes a anti viral and has only one or less out brecks a yr and has remarried to a great guy who loves her for her but how hard to have to tell somebody that and I guess because it happend to just a good girl and she deserved everything good in life that if I met a guy (of course I am married so this is just a what if ) that may have same situation I could deal with it .
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prettygirl326
by Bronze Member on May. 4, 2012 at 11:08 PM

 oh yeah you are right...i explained it but i wasn't looking at the difference she was asking about...sorry...i am not crazy i do know the difference between the two. somehow i thought she meant cold sores or hsv

Quoting TummyTurner:

Oh jeez. HPV and HSV are two totally different things. My goodness.

Quoting prettygirl326:

 um both are the same..actually i am not sure if she meant HPV or HSV lol but HSV, herpes simplex virus...there are a few forms. HSV-1 and HSV-2 are both the more known forms. you can have both. hsv-1 causes cold sores and the latter, genital blisters, sores, or tears.  


Quoting TummyTurner:


HPV or cold sores? Like the herpes virus?


Quoting Ashley_Carlson:


I have HPV due to a sexual assault. The SOB kissed me, that's all it took. I'm still very bitter about it. I get sores inside my mouth frequently because of it. I told my SO before we even officially got together and he said he didn't care. Now he's turned it against me and is taunting me for it. That SOB's ass is on the curb the moment I find a job.




 

 

areid1023
by Platinum Member on May. 4, 2012 at 11:10 PM

most of them dont just 'pop up' with proper testing. if y'all have been together for at least two years, and have been properly tested or had proper medical work done i would definitely question what he was doing if an std or questionable symptom(s) that might indicate an std arise.

Quoting Elayna90:

I am not sure.

I have a cancerous strain of HPV. I have tested positive for about 2 years now. My husband didn't leave me. So if he had one pop up, I don't think it would be a deal breaker.
If I were still dating, I think it would be a deal breaker.


 my little bug! 11-29-08

prettygirl326
by Bronze Member on May. 4, 2012 at 11:11 PM

 nooo sorry it wasn't a no duh moment. i was just telling how and why i know she got it mixed up. my proof is stating that i have both...so i know she couldn't have been talking about having hpv as she stated.

Quoting spastic_poodle:

*ummmm* you didn't tell us that so ummmm how was I supposed to know you have hpv too and were taking about that ummmm?


Quoting prettygirl326:

 um actually i was diagnose with HPV and HSV. you can't cure eithe one. for one, she said that she got it from a kiss (sounds like herpes to me) as you can't get HPV like that. second, you take meds for HSV not HPV. you can go to the doc and find that you are ok, because HPV can correct itself depending on the strain. I have the one that causes cancer...i was abnormal right before and during pregnancy, but once i had the baby, my pap was normal...for now. So i think she got them mixed up...


Quoting spastic_poodle:

She's talking about hpv, you're talking about HSV (herpes.) That's why hers was curable. Yours is not.

Though some people do seem to be immune to the disease.



Quoting prettygirl326:


 wtf i have never heard of that...so you are just a carrier? i might be too...my hubby has never had an outbreak in the three years we have been together and i am so jealous. i get them, but they are more like little splits and tears, not blisters.



Quoting Ashley_Carlson:



Just a note: My strain is treatable and sometimes curable. So I can't transmit it as long as I don't get all lovey dovey while I'm having an outbreak. I haven't had an outbreak in 10 months and my last test came back negative. My doc is going to test me again and if that comes back negative, then I'm finally cured! :D



Quoting Ashley_Carlson:



I have HPV due to a sexual assault. The SOB kissed me, that's all it took. I'm still very bitter about it. I get sores inside my mouth frequently because of it. I told my SO before we even officially got together and he said he didn't care. Now he's turned it against me and is taunting me for it. That SOB's ass is on the curb the moment I find a job.






 



 


 

nikki32230
by on May. 4, 2012 at 11:13 PM
For me, it's is a dealbreaker. It's not fair but I just couldn't.....
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Elayna90
by on May. 4, 2012 at 11:14 PM
We have been together longer than that. Some STD's do lay dormant and can for a long time. If it just randomly showed up, you can bet I would be doing a lot of research on it.
When I came up positive for HPV, he freaked at first. We were both pissed with each other. Then we talked to a Dr. But it shook us.
So I know it can happen. That doesn't mean I wouldn't question it though. :)


Quoting areid1023:

most of them dont just 'pop up' with proper testing. if y'all have been together for at least two years, and have been properly tested or had proper medical work done i would definitely question what he was doing if an std or questionable symptom(s) that might indicate an std arise.


Quoting Elayna90:

I am not sure.



I have a cancerous strain of HPV. I have tested positive for about 2 years now. My husband didn't leave me. So if he had one pop up, I don't think it would be a deal breaker.

If I were still dating, I think it would be a deal breaker.


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