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Should we pay for their wedding cake? UPDATE

SOs cousin was getting married in Oct. she asked if we can help with the cake. We said yes we have time to save money and pay it. She was having a semi big wedding and cake was coming out to a little over $400.

Now she decides she wants a small wedding and the new date is June 1st. She text me earlier to let me know. Since this will be a bit small now her cake will be $250 but the thing is SO hasn't been working for 3 weeks already. Right now we can't spend those $250 because i feel it needs to go to other things. We had over 3 months to save money and we were fine but now not so much.

Thing is SO says we should still pay for it that we will be fine. We might be I guess but I feel we shouldn't waste that money because it can go toward something else. We don't know when he will go back to work. I would really love to help them with their wedding they have helped us out in the past. I just don't feel now is the time to spend that much. What would you do?


Update: I just wanted to thank you guys for your answers. It was hard to make a decision because they have helped us in the past. We decided at first to only help them with half. Luckily SO started working again yesterday so we will be Able to help them with the whole cost. She chose a new cake that will cost $200. I'm very happy things worked out. They will have a cute wedding.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on May. 4, 2012 at 10:45 PM
Replies (21-30):
lynettemommie4
by on May. 4, 2012 at 10:57 PM

I would talk to her and explain things to her. maybe offer to pay half.

JocelynsMommy30
by Silver Member on May. 4, 2012 at 10:58 PM
I would be fine with it if SO was working but right now he hasn't for 3 weeks. We don't know when he'll be back. That's the problem. I don't want to pay for the cake and after something happen and we need the money. I just don't feel comfortable with that right now.

Quoting xo.MommyW.xo:

I dont go back on promises. She did not make it seem like that was the case.



Quoting i_lovedyoufirst:

Ok. But things happen. What if they need that $250 to guarantee their family has food?






Quoting xo.MommyW.xo:

You said you would do it.  Cant go back on your word


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Astaroth
by on May. 4, 2012 at 10:58 PM
Oh, I see.

Yeah, she can't expect you to take care of it with that short of notice. She can have fun even finding a bakery who will make one on that short of notice.


Quoting JocelynsMommy30:

She can afford it we offered ourselves to help and they said the cake. It was fine we had over 3 months to save and pay for it no problem. Now that she decides to make it sooner we have to pay it in 2 weeks. Totally unexpected.



Quoting Astaroth:

I wouldnt. You said you'd help, not pay for the whole cake. She shouldn't have been having a big wedding in the first place if she couldnt afford it.





That is not enough time for you; what your immediate family needs is most important.








/bitch mode


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
JocelynsMommy30
by Silver Member on May. 4, 2012 at 10:59 PM
That's what I'm thinking. Helping with half wouldn't be so bad.

Quoting lynettemommie4:

I would talk to her and explain things to her. maybe offer to pay half.

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Lizard_Lina
by on May. 4, 2012 at 10:59 PM
I like this.

I had to quote it because the like button wasn't going to do it justice.


Quoting Astaroth:

I wouldnt. You said you'd help, not pay for the whole cake. She shouldn't have been having a big wedding in the first place if she couldnt afford it.



That is not enough time for you; what your immediate family needs is most important.





/bitch mode


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
JocelynsMommy30
by Silver Member on May. 4, 2012 at 11:00 PM
Yeah I'm thinking of explaining to her and maybe asking if we can help with half.

Quoting LiliMama18:

I was going to say you should if u promised but then I saw that they pushed the date up a few months. I'd just explain the situation and offer to help in another way that doesn't cost money. I'm sure she'd understand I can't imagine anyone not understanding
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
TheMrs407
by on May. 4, 2012 at 11:00 PM

You said you would help pay.  To me that means you help (follow through with your word but not take full responsibility for it).  Could you go half and half?

JocelynsMommy30
by Silver Member on May. 4, 2012 at 11:02 PM
Actually her friend is going to make it for her. Today she let me know the new date and how much the cake will be costing now that it'll be a small wedding. I was not prepared.

Quoting Astaroth:

Oh, I see.



Yeah, she can't expect you to take care of it with that short of notice. She can have fun even finding a bakery who will make one on that short of notice.




Quoting JocelynsMommy30:

She can afford it we offered ourselves to help and they said the cake. It was fine we had over 3 months to save and pay for it no problem. Now that she decides to make it sooner we have to pay it in 2 weeks. Totally unexpected.





Quoting Astaroth:

I wouldnt. You said you'd help, not pay for the whole cake. She shouldn't have been having a big wedding in the first place if she couldnt afford it.







That is not enough time for you; what your immediate family needs is most important.











/bitch mode



Posted on CafeMom Mobile
AdensMommy1107
by on May. 4, 2012 at 11:02 PM

This

Quoting LoveOfSign:

You had until October, and now she's moving it to June but a smaller cake..   sure you promised you would.. but if it's going to hurt you and the family financially.. I would explain it to her..

Sorry but bills and food for your family should come before a cake..


tennisgal
by on May. 4, 2012 at 11:03 PM

I really think his cousin would understand. A job loss is a life-altering event. 

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