My friend Gerom messaged me on FB and asked "What would you do if I showed up at your house right now wearing nothing but black leather pants?" I thought for a second and simply replied "I'd call your wife and tell her to get your drunk ass off my porch." He replied "Aww, you're no fun." I sent back "Me? I'm lots of fun. You, however, are married. You kinda stopped being fun for other women at that point."
Jimminy Christmas, I have weird friends!