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She's IN MY HOME!!

Posted by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 8:04 AM
  • 65 Replies

 I love my husband with all of my heart and would do anything for him...and now I know that I have. For the last year, he has been cheating on me and I just recently found out. I was so devastated by the news when he told me that I tried to commit suicide twice, was keep in observation at the pysch ward for a week and was finally sent home three days ago. While I was in the hospital, his mistress watched my kids. MY FUCKING KIDS IN MY FUCKING HOME!! He said he needed someone and couldn't find anyone else who would not tell the world of what was happening.

Back Story to this is that he lately have been telling me about how he wanted to do more with me but due to the kids and being alone in the state we're in, we haven't been on a one-on-one date in 9 years. Communication between us is pratically nonexistent. He comes home from work, and either plays on his phone or goes to sleep with an occasional arguement between us because I'm a stay at home mom and would like to see him more often. The excuses would always be that the kids are in the way or he has to work very long hours. Now, when it comes to his work and a truck driver, he gets to go out of town to either Dallas, Houston, Corpus Christie, pratically all over Texas and comes home one to three days later only to get ready to do it again. And this is where she comes in. All the trips that he went on, she was with him. EVERY SINGLE TRIP! Even the trips that he went on and was back home the same day, she was there. I felt that he might have been cheating so I dropped recording devices all over and caught him talking to her, having sex in my car. And when I confronted him on it, he would tell me some story and leave it like that.

All the while he's been working he's been telling me that he can't take anyone with him, I can't see him or talk to him and that he wished I could come but he would lose his job, but at the same time would tell me that he wished I knew someone who would watch the kids so I could go. I always got those conflicting words from him. I didn't know whether he was trying to tell me something or whatvever. A week ago, I told my husband that I loved the dynamic of the relationship of the TLC show, Sister Wives because they always had someone around to talk to and to be with. So after a long, 5-6 hour discussion, he admitted to me that he has been seeing someone for the last year and that if I wanted that, she would be willing to do so. At first, I thought he was joking. But when I realized he was telling the truth, I went numb and went along with what he wanted. He called her in front of me and went to go pick her up.

Even though he told her not to, she told me about everything she could remember about what they did together, the trips, shopping sprees, everything he did for her that he never did for me. After hearing all of that, I tried to kill myself by slashing my wrist. It wasn't too deep and I've never seen so many cops in my home at the same time. I asked him so many times what's wrong with me, what'sso bad that you would cheat. The first time he told me that he finds me boring because I'm interested in things like fine art and politics and that, with his brother telling me this as well, if I kept myself up, he might not have done it. That I nagged him too much and that he likes to have sex all the time and I'm always busy with the kids. For the last year, he told me that he said that in anger because I caught him and he desn't feel that way about me, but after all this, I think it's true.Now after my hospital stay, she then tried to commit suicide and was admitted to the hospital as well. And while he's there taking care of her, I'm at home, dealing with the fact that my husband is in the hosptial with his girlfriend and I couldn't take it anymore, so I started popping pills and downing an entire bottle of vodka. That's when I stayed a week in the hospital. Now we all live in the same house, sleeping in the same bed and I don't know what to do. I actually feel numb. I have wanted to cry for the last week and haven't been able to, which is hard to believe becasue I'm a big time crier. He told me that she can't go home because her family is abusive to her and he doesn't want anything bad to happen to her. I have no emotional response to it all except that I don't care. She's walking around my home, playing with my kids, and chatting up my husband, making me loo like I'm the outsider. I love him so damn much and the only thing I feel is that I'm incredibly stupid for dealing with this. He's living out his fanasty while I lay there in complete shock.I just found out they have a Facebook page together. This is when he all ready has another account where he claims that he's a happy family man, there are no pictures of me on it at all. But that would conflict with the fact their page states they're married. I'm the only one legally married to him. I don't use Facebook so I don't know how long its been up. Everyone could see it including our family members. We live in a small town so I'm walking around, looking stupid because the whole world knew about it before I did.

Sorry it's so long, just had to get it off my chest. What should I do?

by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 8:04 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Nunyabusiness
by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 8:12 AM
2 moms liked this

Pack your stuff and leave! Do you have family to go with? Anybody to lean on? You do not need this, you do not deserve this and you shouldn't stick around to see just how much shittier he can make you feel. 

Delirium003
by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 8:16 AM
I'm so sorry you are dealing with this. My dad did the exact same thing to my mom recently. 35 years married, he cheated on my mom with her best friend. My dad had the same excuses as your dh does.

Please. Be smarter than my mom and LEAVE his ass. You deserve better!!!!
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AloneInTheWo193
by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 8:17 AM

I have no family or friends nearby. I'm by myself in Louisana and no one knows where I'm at. All my family are either dead, in Florida or California. And they have all ready told me that this is my bed I should lay in it. They are still upset at me because I ran away from home and dropped out of high school  to be with him 10 years ago and never forgave me for it.

mommytoeandb
by Gold Member on Jun. 16, 2012 at 8:21 AM
You need to leave. This is his issue and is not a reflection if you. And if anyone asks, I would tell the truth. He sounds like a compulsive liar. Keep in mind that any woman that would do that is not the kind of person you want to be. He seems to be manipulating you. And, I would confront those that knew and then move on. GL!
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coolmommy2x
by Ruby Member on Jun. 16, 2012 at 8:22 AM
2 moms liked this
This! And to answer your question, there is nothing wrong with you! He is selfish! Don't give him any power over you. There is a big difference between the relationships in a polygamist marriage and what he did. Leave him before he can do further damage you and your children.

Quoting Nunyabusiness:

Pack your stuff and leave! Do you have family to go with? Anybody to lean on? You do not need this, you do not deserve this and you shouldn't stick around to see just how much shittier he can make you feel. 

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AloneInTheWo193
by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 8:22 AM

I really wish I could leave but I feel like I just don't care anymore. I don't know if it's shock. The entire time I thought he was cheating, I was having panic attacks so bad, I thought I was having a heart attack. Now, I feel nothing. Nothing at all. Is something wrong with me? I knowI gained weight from having my three kids in a five year span but could I be so horrible that he cheated?

nancym3
by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 8:23 AM
Leave and don't look back. Find a way. It might take a little while but as soon as you can.
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mommytoeandb
by Gold Member on Jun. 16, 2012 at 8:24 AM
Do it for your kids.
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Caitlinmari
by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 8:27 AM
3 moms liked this
Omg leave! Go make phone calls they have places that will help pay for rent til you get on your feet also find a job! You can get daycare assistance. I would never deal with this stuff and constantly trying to commit suicide between you and the gf? What about your kids? This sounds like you guys are competing for attention. What are your kids doing when you pop pills and down a bottle? You all need to grow up.
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AloneInTheWo193
by on Jun. 16, 2012 at 8:27 AM


Quoting mommytoeandb:

 And, I would confront those that knew and then move on.

I think his mother knew and was trying to tell me. She doesn't have my number directly so she would call himand would ask for me. And that's something she never did before. When I would talk to her, she would tell me all the time to check out Facebook and I should really come see her. But with one vehicle and him saying that I should never go around his family, I never got the chance. Maybe I would have found out sooner

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