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DFs reaction ...im heartbroken..UPDATE we talked

i  just found out im pregnant  i am having ahard time dealing with this still and im kinda in shock/maybe denyal. i tell df  i needed to tell him something when he had aminute to call me. he asked what it was and i told him im pregnant  that i just found out and im scared and upset   and to please not be mad. his response.... "how can this happen! ive barley touched you latley!! the other day  was the first time in a while!! ( a week for the record) and before that you were on the pill so HOW did you  get pregnant ?? i corrected him calmly  saying" no dear  you knew i wasnt on the pill anymore and thats why you  decided to just pull out, and the one day  you didnt pull out i went and got  the plan B pill to prevent this."  he the asked one more question about  the type of test i  had and  said maybe its wrong... w/e yes one from the hospital and two at home tests all wrong...  but told him i had an apt tomorrow to get a blood test and ultrasound ( im high risk so they need to see exactly how far along i am) and  he just says ok i gotta go so and so needs my help bye... and hangs up... no i love you, nothing. he made it sound like it couldnt possibly be him who got me pregnant  and like he was accusing me of sleeping around I HAVE NEVER EVER CHEATED ON  HIM!!!   i understand being upset and in shock..im  dealing with it to  but to be a dick to me??? hell we have a kid together already!!!!  its not like he just  never had a kid and  didnt want kids with me or wasnt commited to me . i am heartbroken by his reaction... i dont know why i even told him i knew he would be pissed n take it out on me one way or another...

UPDATE****  Df came hoome to talk.. told me it was my choice  on what to  do  then everytime i thought of a way we could manage financially to keep the baby he said stop lying to yourself your health is bad  you were sick with dds pregnancy and couldnt work why do you think youll be able to finish school?   the  kinda talk continued over an hour , id then say well what do you ant me to do call planned parenthood and have an abbortion and hed tell me i cant handle  an abortion ( hes right i talk about  th epossiblilty of getting one and cry) so basically i cant handle having another baby, its going to cause us to loose our home because i wont beable to finsish school regardless of what i say, but i cant handle an abortion either... then tells me to think about it and when i say one or the other he argues with me the opposite side.... so i have no idea whats going on in his head and no idea what we are doing.

by on Jun. 20, 2012 at 12:04 PM
Replies (11-20):
SevysMomma
by on Jun. 20, 2012 at 2:07 PM

Wow, that sucks. I am sure it's just shock though - try not to get too defensive towards his stupid ass remarks about cheating or he might further believe it true. Congrats on your pregnancy, hope things turn around soon.

puddinpopsmama
by on Jun. 20, 2012 at 2:13 PM

BUMP!

hautemama83
by Nichole on Jun. 20, 2012 at 2:17 PM
Is there a reason his reaction is so bad? Why is it you'll lose your house if you don't continue school, and why can't you continue school?
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Trackerchick
by on Jun. 20, 2012 at 2:20 PM
Do you mind sharing why you are high risk?
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puddinpopsmama
by on Jun. 20, 2012 at 2:21 PM


Quoting hautemama83:

Is there a reason his reaction is so bad? Why is it you'll lose your house if you don't continue school, and why can't you continue school?

Financail aid pays for our house while im in school. i  have alot of health issues so i struggle as it is to do small tasks. school is very difficult when im constantly sick ..... other then that i dont know why his reaction is  like this. i mean he was comforting t some points hugging me   ect.  but then other moments he was  arumentative  regardless of what  i suggested i mean ther are only two real options here keep the baby , deal with my health,  try my hardest in school and hope to god i dont have a repeat of when i was pregnant with dd or dont keep the baby  niether is  good enough fo rhim at t his point, i kinda feel like he is in the same  thought process i am  wants the baby but knows  this choice could have  some really bad consequences for me and the baby and our current dd and him.

Ijstwnt2Palone
by on Jun. 20, 2012 at 2:21 PM
How can you lose your home by not finishing school? Do you mind me asking what makes you high risk?... you need time to think what's best for you.. don't make a hasty decision that you'll regret just to please him. He just needs time to process it... try to get out together.. no kids.. go over the pros and cons and try to figure it out if possible. I have 5 kids.. I'm a SAHM..were a 1 income family... its doable.. I wish I could help you... I know how much that hopeless feeling sucks... hang in there ((hug))
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.Pagan.
by on Jun. 20, 2012 at 2:23 PM

id drop it for a little bit and just give him a minuteto process everything. it might take him a week or two to get over the shock of everything.

Christywf
by Silver Member on Jun. 20, 2012 at 2:27 PM

What about adoption?

LntLckrsCmQut
by on Jun. 20, 2012 at 2:27 PM


Quoting puddinpopsmama:


Quoting hautemama83:

Is there a reason his reaction is so bad? Why is it you'll lose your house if you don't continue school, and why can't you continue school?

Financail aid pays for our house while im in school. i  have alot of health issues so i struggle as it is to do small tasks. school is very difficult when im constantly sick ..... other then that i dont know why his reaction is  like this. i mean he was comforting t some points hugging me   ect.  but then other moments he was  arumentative  regardless of what  i suggested i mean ther are only two real options here keep the baby , deal with my health,  try my hardest in school and hope to god i dont have a repeat of when i was pregnant with dd or dont keep the baby  niether is  good enough fo rhim at t his point, i kinda feel like he is in the same  thought process i am  wants the baby but knows  this choice could have  some really bad consequences for me and the baby and our current dd and him.

*Shakes head*

mackQuin
by on Jun. 20, 2012 at 2:29 PM
Why did you go off BC Ans why weren't you guys being proactive at preventing this?

Regardless. Its done. If my health was as bad as you say yours is.and how bad a pregnancy.complicates it.and if I had other children..I would abort.
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