She said, "Honey, whatever you do, don't ever let yourself become a "make-do" woman" I had no idea what she meant, but, of course, she was
about to explain.
She continued, "Men" don't deny themselves anything. Whatever they want to buy, they buy. Whatever they want to do, they do.
scraping |the bottom of her tube of lipstick! Oh, I could go on and on with how "we" make do.
And why? Because the car needs fixing, this bill is behind, we have to use our time to take care of this, or take care of that; we're saving for this, working, cooking, cleaning, raising, etc." She warned me to Never become a make-do woman, because she says if you start, it is hard to stop and one could easily find themselves making-do for the rest of their Lives. I vowed it would never happen to me. I didn't think much more of the conversation until one day, I began to take notice, she was right. Men Are a lot better at being good to them selves. Some call it being selfish, there has to be another word for it. Tell me if you know.
Whatever you call it. It does have its place. When they want to play ball, or golf, or fish, they go! When they want to buy clothes, or equipment, or video games, or whatever their "thing" is, they buy! Have you ever tried to stop one? Has anyone ever been able to stop one? Let me know! When I look around, I see a whole heap of Make-do women, married or not, with or without children, they are all over the place!
I have decided that I am going to make my best effort to become a "make-time" woman! I will make the time to do what I need to do to be good to myself, whether that's a trip to the salon, or the gym or the mall. This time I'm going to take a lesson from the guys!
Men always want women to look nice, smell nice, feel nice, love themselves, be themselves, be proud of themselves, take care of themselves but they never support them in being this to themselves. They just want and want and want. They will all sit at a braai and discuss how their wife’s stopped taking care of themselves and how the weight gained the hair got shorter the tight pants and heel flew out the window etc, etc ,etc how wife’s don’t want to hug or kiss or hold hands anymore but they never admit that women are never allowed to have any time or money for themselves to still be pretty for their husbands or themselves. Wife’s that doesn’t feel and look pretty for themselves doesn’t feel pretty for their husbands and that’s when all the “physical affection” flies out the window…..and all this why?????????? Because men just WANT and WANT and only care about what THEY WANT.
All right ladies, single and married... Let's NOT be "MAKE-DO" Women! Let's LOVE OURSELVES and ENCOURAGE each other! Pass it on! It's something we could all appreciate...
Quoting itsm3:oh i'm definitely not a "make do" woman; i make sure to take time for myself whether it be to doll myself up, cultivate my passion(s), work out or just take "me" time. it's all about balance - when one takes time out for themselves to DO things for themselves, they are happier.
i don't do this for dh either - i do it for ME.
I was a make do woman for awhile especially during my 4 children's teen years and I was letting myself go making sure everyone else was fine and had what they needed. Was getting in a frazzled state for awhile and getting deeper. From comments made by family--mom, kids, and dh--and friends I needed to stop and look at myself. So I did and got some counseling. That was my turning point away from being a make do woman. I started taking care of myself first spiritually, mentally, and physically and then everyone else as needed. Within a year or so I was back to the way I was before I married. Dh even commented that I was fun-babe again. Many things in family life improved since that turning point, epecially sex time with my dh. No, I am not self-centered but I do take care of the woman that I am.
Quoting opinionatedmom:
Quoting frndlyfn:
Quoting opinionatedmom:
Quoting frndlyfn:
Quoting opinionatedmom:
the wife, making do with her hair not being done, her nails in need, never had a pedicure,
scraping |the bottom of her tube of lipstick
some women don't like this stuff, like me. I choose not to be a barbie doll but I don't make do either. but I get the meaning of what you are saying.
Yes it pretty much means not taking care of yourself. Some women feel better about themselves when they can do up their hair, paint nails etc. I am not much of a girly girl so i can see your perspective.
doing up my hair is pulling it back in a ponytail. painting my nails is pointless cause I would just break them and get them greasy and I have no idea what a pedicure is. I love my ball caps and they flatten my hair. :) I do buy cute girl clothes to wear once in a while though. make up is for funerals, weddings and bar nights. :)
I have never had a pedicure. I fear the way my feet are now, I would get badly infected. A pedicure is where you go to a nail salon and they soak your feet, then use a tool to scrape off the barnacles, lotion on your feet/legs, and then pretty color on toes. At least that is what my understanding is of a pedicure LOL.
that word is not in my dictionary. and barnacles is a big word what the hell is that? I want my toes pink camoflauge lol
Quoting LaughCryLive:
I think many men are like the post. My exhusband sacrificed a lot to make sure the bills were paid but otherwise I had to make do while he wore Armani and drove an Audi.
Quoting Kaelaasmom:
Wow. I am glad I married a man who puts the needs of his family above his own needs. We have both "made do" when we needed to.
Honestly, I found this insulting to men. They aren't all selfish assholes. In fact, most are very decent.
Quoting Kaelaasmom:
I am sorry you went through that, but that doesn't mean most men are like that.
Quoting LaughCryLive:
I think many men are like the post. My exhusband sacrificed a lot to make sure the bills were paid but otherwise I had to make do while he wore Armani and drove an Audi.
Quoting Kaelaasmom:
Wow. I am glad I married a man who puts the needs of his family above his own needs. We have both "made do" when we needed to.
Honestly, I found this insulting to men. They aren't all selfish assholes. In fact, most are very decent.
How can I take three children to the store by myself? I have never done this but my husband says he won't go anymore.
- frndlyfn
on Jul. 5, 2012 at 2:00 AM