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would your husband move for you?

Posted by on Jul. 26, 2012 at 2:04 AM
  • 73 Replies

I am from the south, when I was 21 I moved up North, my husband and I got married and now have 2 small kids, when I was younger I decided to move here cause I acted on impulse and never once thought of what my future would be like, so long story short, I have lived up north for 10 years now, I really want to move back to the south where my whole life is my family my friends, so much support and help with the kids, and here my husband is a homebody, and barely talks to his mom and dad, he does but not much, they are not as close to one another as I am with my famiy,  so life in the south with my family and friends would be awsome, so much family , friends , support and life would just be great,  my husband wont even consider moving there , not even for a year trial period, we dont own a house, we rent, the only thing is he has been at his job for 13  years, and i told him to talk to his boss and see if he were to move to the south for a 1 to test it out, could he get his job back and he wont ask and doesn't want to even talk about moving.   so now my question is , so what is it suppose to be like for me for my future, live somewhere where i am isolated, hardly any family and just live like this, it is not like i can just say hey honey, since I moved for you and have been here for 10 years and you cant even try to move for me for atleast a year, the kids and i are moving to the south to be with family and friends, see you later, I cant do that, but what do married people do about situations like this? Thanks and sorry it is so long.

by on Jul. 26, 2012 at 2:04 AM
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Replies (1-10):
marinenonstop
by on Jul. 26, 2012 at 2:06 AM
If i was unhappy where i was, yes he would. In fact he almost did at one point and i changed my mind and wanted to stay. Im sorry you're having a hard time.
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luvmybaby430
by on Jul. 26, 2012 at 2:08 AM


Quoting marinenonstop:

If i was unhappy where i was, yes he would. In fact he almost did at one point and i changed my mind and wanted to stay. Im sorry you're having a hard time.

thanks, what do i do, just live the rest of my life somewhere I dont want to for the sake of the kids or what, cause i dont see it looking good, kids split from us and one gets them for the summer and one gets them for the school year, I honestly dont know how that would even work, being from 2000 miles apart, its just sad, you would think that he would atleast try a year for me :(


GingerZombie
by on Jul. 26, 2012 at 2:08 AM
Yeah, but I'm the boss. Jk...kinda
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marinenonstop
by on Jul. 26, 2012 at 2:11 AM
I think you need to talk him more. Express how angry, alone, lost you're feeling. Try not to give him an ultimatum ..just tell him you're not in a good place there.


Quoting luvmybaby430:



Quoting marinenonstop:

If i was unhappy where i was, yes he would. In fact he almost did at one point and i changed my mind and wanted to stay. Im sorry you're having a hard time.

thanks, what do i do, just live the rest of my life somewhere I dont want to for the sake of the kids or what, cause i dont see it looking good, kids split from us and one gets them for the summer and one gets them for the school year, I honestly dont know how that would even work, being from 2000 miles apart, its just sad, you would think that he would atleast try a year for me :(



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Rose87
by on Jul. 26, 2012 at 2:12 AM
Yep. We plan to move overseas because we both agreed it'll be better for us and our kids. He's close to his family, while I am not close to mine.

He said he's willing to move to the moon and about to ensure our family is in a stable environment and to ensure I am somewhere I can be at peace.
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connie45
by Gold Member on Jul. 26, 2012 at 2:13 AM
1 mom liked this
You need to show him charts, statistics, facts and graphs detailing why it would benefit your family unit to move.
A pro/con list. Heavy on,the Pro.
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H3ath3rM
by on Jul. 26, 2012 at 2:13 AM
1 mom liked this
I moved to Utah for my husband to try it out when he landed this great job but I hated it there it was beautiful and peaceful but just not for me so my husband moved us back to Texas! Sorry hope it all works out for u!
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GingerZombie
by on Jul. 26, 2012 at 2:14 AM
Tell him it's making you depressed being away from your family. I say you've done your time, his turn. But you know him better than anyone...you know if he'll budge. I'm kinda leaning towards initial conflict and then caving in. He wont want to go because it wont sit well with his being so reserved...reassure him that you aren't going to push him into more than he's comfortable wigh and you'll still be his homebody buddy sometimes too. You need your fam. So do the kids. It's crucial. I'd probably leave even if he didn't if I were miserable and homesick as you sound. Fortunately for dh, I enjoy and am currently closer to his family vastly more than my own, small family...

Quoting luvmybaby430:



Quoting marinenonstop:

If i was unhappy where i was, yes he would. In fact he almost did at one point and i changed my mind and wanted to stay. Im sorry you're having a hard time.

thanks, what do i do, just live the rest of my life somewhere I dont want to for the sake of the kids or what, cause i dont see it looking good, kids split from us and one gets them for the summer and one gets them for the school year, I honestly dont know how that would even work, being from 2000 miles apart, its just sad, you would think that he would atleast try a year for me :(


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
luvmybaby430
by on Jul. 26, 2012 at 2:14 AM

thanks, I have but he just doesnt talk about it, its like in my heart, I feel like  it would be on me, like be married and have two kids, or get divorced and share custody, but I am not sure what to do, I really dont see me growing old in this town. I am so hurt and confused, I honestly have no idea what to do, I feel like I am just living my life on idol.

Quoting marinenonstop:

I think you need to talk him more. Express how angry, alone, lost you're feeling. Try not to give him an ultimatum ..just tell him you're not in a good place there.


Quoting luvmybaby430:



Quoting marinenonstop:

If i was unhappy where i was, yes he would. In fact he almost did at one point and i changed my mind and wanted to stay. Im sorry you're having a hard time.

thanks, what do i do, just live the rest of my life somewhere I dont want to for the sake of the kids or what, cause i dont see it looking good, kids split from us and one gets them for the summer and one gets them for the school year, I honestly dont know how that would even work, being from 2000 miles apart, its just sad, you would think that he would atleast try a year for me :(




luvmybaby430
by on Jul. 26, 2012 at 2:15 AM
1 mom liked this


Quoting Rose87:

Yep. We plan to move overseas because we both agreed it'll be better for us and our kids. He's close to his family, while I am not close to mine.

He said he's willing to move to the moon and about to ensure our family is in a stable environment and to ensure I am somewhere I can be at peace.

awww, you have a great guy!! That is so awsome

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