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When bullying victims fight back, they get in trouble. At least at our school.

I know all fighting is wrong, but my daughter *finally* fought back for once and she got a referral for "sexual misconduct" because she kicked the boy in the groin after he flung her around and tried to slam her to the ground.

She's been sexually harassed on a regular basis for months by numerous students (dyke, cunt, etc), and nobody got written up for sexual misconduct. She's been hit, scratched, punched, etc. Nobody was written up. They all just "got a talking to". But the FIRST time she fights back, she gets a referral to go on her permanent record.

What Happens When Bully Victims Fight Back

I am so exhausted from dealing with this. I can't imagine how she feels.

I am looking into other schools next week.

I wrote the full story on my blog but am too tired to type it. :(

by on Nov. 15, 2012 at 11:02 PM
Replies (11-20):
by on Nov. 16, 2012 at 12:37 AM
1 mom liked this
Call the school directers. That's what I do every time an issue comes up where my son is defending himself. If that don't work then do what one of the girls said and go to the news.
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by Gold Member on Nov. 16, 2012 at 1:44 AM

 If that happened to my kid, heads would roll...

My eldest was bullied when he was 5 by a 10yo. Principal did NOTHING..this was 13 years ago..before all the bullying laws.

First thing I'd be on the phone with the superintendant.

Quoting Luv_my_hubby:

 Stand your ground and fight the referral. Go up the chain of command. If all else fails do what we ended up doing removing our child from the torture.


by on Nov. 16, 2012 at 6:05 AM
This infuriates me! I would go up the chain of command until this was resolved!!!!!!!
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by on Nov. 16, 2012 at 6:26 AM

I got sent to the principal when I finally stood up to my bully. This was after the teacher allowed him to cuss me out and belittle me in front of the whole class. Pure bullshit.

by on Nov. 16, 2012 at 9:09 AM

that is complete BS.  i agree with the whole not fighting  thing but when a child is constantly targeted by a bully, at some point, they have to fight back for themselves.  

if my dd was ever in that situation and she tried to ignore it/told the teacher/nothing happened/kept on getting bullied/parental intervention didn't help at all etc, i would tell her straight up to punch that kid in the face and put an end to it.  this isn't a popular opinion but like i said, if it was constant and never let up no matter what we did to try and resolve it amicably and in a non-violent way, this is what i would do.  

when a kid is always bullied/targeted; sad things like suicide and depression occur.  bullying needs to END. i'm so sorry your child is going through this.  good for her for standing up for herself!

by Ruby Member on Nov. 16, 2012 at 11:38 AM

 I totally agree with you.  However, she got the sexual misconduct mark because she hit him in the groin.  When they've attacked her, unless the scratches or bruises were in a sexual area, they wouldn't be considered sexual misconduct.  Verbal attacks wouldn't be misconduct either, they would be harrassment. 

Again, I'm on your side but I can see why she got the write up that she did (although it's not fair).  I hope you get her into another school ASAP. 

by on Nov. 16, 2012 at 12:03 PM

And this is why bullying will never be something of the past, as the schools continue to victimize the victims and cater to the bullys...........F-ing pisses me off and i am really sorry your sweet DD has to deal with that crap !

by on Nov. 16, 2012 at 12:07 PM
This happened at my school when i was younger, she would just harass me, but when she put het hands on me i fought back. They tried to suspend me, my mom called my aunt who is a police officer. She ended that shit real quick. Hope ur dd feels better, i would get a lawyer
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by on Nov. 16, 2012 at 12:17 PM

How horrible! Yes. Find another school, ASAP.

by on Nov. 16, 2012 at 12:34 PM

Bump for any updates!

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