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So my 11 month old is upstairs crying. It's bedtime. I've fed him, changed his diaper we played he's rubbing his eyes. Should I let him cry it out or should I try and put him to sleep. What do you think? Why or why not?.

by on Nov. 18, 2012 at 11:06 PM
Replies (31-40):
by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 5:42 AM
Do what you feel is right... each child is different. I personally can't do CIO. I feel horrible. My daughter is five yrs old and being my first child, i just couldnt allow her to cry. Now I have a 5 month old son, and still can't do CIO. I'm a softy... lol
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by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 5:43 AM

Quoting kappalopokis:

I would try to CIO unless he's upset for an excessive amount of time. If you stick with it he'll learn self soothe and settle down for bed on his own in just a few days. Just stick with it!

If he doesn't calm down in say 10-15 minutes, go in, tuck him in, kiss him, and leave. Give him 10-15 minutes again. Etc.

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by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 5:53 AM
My son cio he is asleep within 10 min if I stayed in the room with him he would not sleep.
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by Bronze Member on Nov. 19, 2012 at 11:35 AM
I don't agree with the CIO method. But that's my opinion.
by Bronze Member on Nov. 19, 2012 at 11:43 AM
2 moms liked this
Quoting waffa:

My mom never had us CIO and I don't think the world owes me anything! What a dumb assumption! If you meet your child's needs they will become entitled useless adults? Suuuuurrrreeee. *eye roll*
by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 11:48 AM

I didn't do the CIO thing with DD1 and I won't do it with DD2.  Not our style.  Besides, I just don't think it's healthy.

If you can do it and it's not something that bothers you, go ahead and do it.

by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 11:53 AM
1 mom liked this

In case anyone is up for a good read...

by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 11:55 AM
1 mom liked this
I didn't bring kids into the world to basically let them cry when they need me.. how would you like it if someone put you in a room and let you cry... yep am anti cio.
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by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 11:58 AM
You are and idiot... my niece was cio at 3wks old and she is rude, mean, thinks the world revolves around her and at 8 yrs old still acts like a 5 yr old. My dd is 5 I have never cio. And she is the opposite of my niece. I swear some people are a pathetic excuse for a parent. ( that's to the waffa chick)

Quoting waffa:

if his needs are met, LET HIM CRY or else he will never learn how to soothe himself.

(picture a 20 y/o thinking the world somehow owes him something in life b/c he never learned to soothe his own needs)

Quoting connorsmom2009:

I'm kinda stuck he used to put himself to sleep but not anymore. I'm losed I don't know what to do.

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by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 12:04 PM

I strongly believe in CIO, but I also strongly believe that it needs to be implemented carefully and after thorough research. You need to read up on it (I recommend Ferber and Weissbluth), come up with a plan that you and your husband/partner (if applicable) can both stick to, and THEN start. CIO is not something to do spur-of-the-moment or without knowing exactly WHY you're doing it and what you hope to accomplish.

A lot of the time, when you hear people say, "I tried CIO and it didn't work", it's that they didn't do their research and they did it wrong, or they didn't understand going into it exactly what this method entails, so they gave up halfway through and ended up making the problem worse.

Here's what we did with our daughter--it worked beautifully and now at 13 months, she's an incredible sleeper:

1) We read Ferber's Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems and Weissbluth's Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. We noted any differences between the two and talked about which method we preferred. (Although they are  very similar, they are NOT the same and Ferber and Weissbluth have particularly different ideas on how much sleep babies need.)

2) We institued a consistent, soothing bedtime routine several weeks before we wanted to start CIO.

3) We made sure we could read her sleepy cues and made sure to start CIO at a time when we knew she wasn't sick, teething or going through a growth spurt. We also talked to our downstairs neighbors to let them know we would be doing this, and gave them a gift of a bottle of wine and some earplugs.

4) After two or three weeks of groundwork and preparation, we finally did CIO. It took a few nights, and the first night she cried for about an hour at bedtime and about 20 minutes when she woke up in the middle of the night. We had a plan for how long after bedtime we would feed her, since she wasn't yet sleeping all the way through the night; we decided that if she woke up crying and it had been over 6 hours since bedtime, we would feed her and then put her back down. We made sure we were both on the same page and both prepared to stick it out, and once we started CIO we didn't turn back. It was hard, but it was completely worth it. Now that she sleeps well, she is rested and happy during the day, and we're able to be better parents because we're not worn down and exhausted all the time.

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