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Okay so when my son was born i immediately knew i wanted my sister to be my sons Godmother, then she got divorced so we decided to have my bro in law to be his Godfather along with my sis cuz they were both single and we have a member from each family. But lately my sister has been so distant and she didn't even make it to her future Godson birthday...or even called, she hasn't visit him in almost a year now. And to top it off my bro in law is serious with this new girlfriend he has who no one in the family likes (that's a whole different story) i dont like her and I've voiced it several times and that has caused us to no longer have communication, he on the other hand did show up to my sons birthday party, 1:45 mins late, no present or even a hug to his future Godson..he always takes out his Nieces and nephews out to a movie or zoo on their birthdays except my son and his future Godson..im really questioning my choice...they havent baptized him yet would it be rude of me to communicate to them to step up? Or choose different Godparents?
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by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 6:04 PM
Replies (21-30):
frndlyfn
by Emerald Member on Nov. 19, 2012 at 7:04 PM

I would look at friends who have the same beliefs as you and your husband rather than family which has not shown the same dedication to the belief system.

jyofray
by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 7:04 PM
God parents are a huge deal in this family. If you are not going to take the position seriously, pick ones who will. They are the 2nd parents..And in some cases become the parents when things happen. Who fits best?
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pinkcoffeecup
by Gold Member on Nov. 19, 2012 at 7:21 PM

Depends what denomination you are.  What the rules are at your church. Us Catholics. They say one God parent at least has to be a practicing Catholic. In good standing with their parish. The other can be of another denomination in good standing with their church. Called a Christian witness.  I've always felt the role of God parent was to help bring the child up in whatever faith you believe in. 

pangie23
by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 7:31 PM
Yes i grew up knowing that Godparents like parents are there to guide but in a more religious way, bringing them up with the same religious beliefs to guide them religiously. My issue is if i cant even communicate with my child's Godparents then how are we supposed to guide this child together? Anyhow thanks for the advise all :-)


Quoting pinkcoffeecup:

Depends what denomination you are.  What the rules are at your church. Us Catholics. They say one God parent at least has to be a practicing Catholic. In good standing with their parish. The other can be of another denomination in good standing with their church. Called a Christian witness.  I've always felt the role of God parent was to help bring the child up in whatever faith you believe in. 


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coolmommy2x
by Ruby Member on Nov. 19, 2012 at 7:32 PM
Honestly, I think you're overthinking this.

Godparents are only needed at religious events (baptisms, communications, etc). It's not a job that need to be fulfilled everyday. My son's Godparents live in another state and got divorced so technically the Godfather isn't a relative anymore. At my niece's First Communion last year, I wasn't even needed (class was too large) and I am her Godmother.

It would be nice if the Godparents wanted to be more involved but it doesn't always work out that way. Choose whomever you wish but don't hold it over their heads that if they don't behave or to perform to your expectations they will be replaced.
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pangie23
by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 7:36 PM
My Godparents were on my dads side of the family and i havent seen them since i was 7, i was baptized at age 5. So i really dont want that to happen to my son because im actually taking this seriously.


Quoting coolmommy2x:

Honestly, I think you're overthinking this.



Godparents are only needed at religious events (baptisms, communications, etc). It's not a job that need to be fulfilled everyday. My son's Godparents live in another state and got divorced so technically the Godfather isn't a relative anymore. At my niece's First Communion last year, I wasn't even needed (class was too large) and I am her Godmother.



It would be nice if the Godparents wanted to be more involved but it doesn't always work out that way. Choose whomever you wish but don't hold it over their heads that if they don't behave or to perform to your expectations they will be replaced.

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LovinLife81
by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 7:36 PM

I have god children but the bond is blessed by the church.

momtoBrenna
by Silver Member on Nov. 19, 2012 at 7:38 PM
1 mom liked this

We have godparents for our kids but not for religious purposes. We have them for in case something happens to both of us when they are still young. Our siblings are not in spots where they can do it and the grandparents are out too so they are one of my best friends and her dh. My mom is mad that they aren't blood relations but we don't care. They would do the best job. We need to get it on paper but everyone is aware of our wishes. 

IHeartDraven
by on Nov. 19, 2012 at 7:39 PM
More to this than the OPs questions but I'm godmother to 3 beautiful little boys and I'm not Christian or a believer in any organized religion :p
Kinda crazy
Good thing I didn't have to pass a test on thier religion bc I would have failed hands down.
We..,my best friend and I...based our decisions not based on religious requirements but who we thought would love and cherish our children if we were to no longer be here.
OP sounds like maybe you need to rethink your decision. Good luck


Quoting Y2kmomma:

But I think it's silly that you NEED to have god parents. We are catholic and I still think that.




Quoting Y2kmomma:

If you are religious, it's picking people to make sure they grow up in your religious belief if something happens to you.





OP- I would pick different ones. They might not even notice lol.






Quoting JennyCaps:

I don't see the point in God parents so I'm no help. Bump






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coolmommy2x
by Ruby Member on Nov. 19, 2012 at 7:43 PM
You're thinking of guardians. They would be responsible for raising the kids if anything to OP and her DH.

Quoting jillbailey26:

You don't have to pick them again.  Also, look into a will.  Something that would state who gets your kids if something bad happens to you.  Make it a logical choice.  People who can provide for them, love them, and be responsible parents.

Quoting pangie23:

They were when my son was born but now they're both totally different ppl, my sister raised me and she was what i thought the most responsible person i knew and my mother figure and my bro inlaw was too a very responsible young man too and now they're so different





Quoting jillbailey26:

I'm pretty sure the purpose is to have someone for them to if something were to happen to you.  Pick someone in your life that is reliable and would be a good parent to your child in case they're needed.

Quoting pangie23:

To be completely honest i dont either. We're Catholic and in order for anyone to get baptized they must have Godparents, i want my son to get baptized and get Gods blessing and i truly find it absurd that in order to do that i have to pick a couple to be his Godpatents. *no offense to anyone* this is just my opinion








Quoting JennyCaps:

I don't see the point in God parents so I'm no help. Bump










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