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I know that today is a day to be thankful but it is really hard right now.

We went to a friends restaurant for a holiday meal. Dan, the kids, his mom, and my dad were with me and it was wonderful. Our friends serve all their friends and family for this day as a gift to them. I brought the homemade pies. It was magical.

Dan's mom went to the bathroom while my kids were up front singing kareoke. I was at the back of the restaurant with Dan and my dad. Then everything went nuts real quick. The owners older son ran to me and grabbed my arm lifting me out of the chair and said to hurry. The owners wife was taking the kids to a table to sit quickly. Annie was crying.

My mother-in-law was on the floor in Carlos's arms trembling and white as her hair. A waitress was calling 911. Dan followed me but ran back for moms purse. Mom is in liver failure and it gets worse each week. I am trying to donate to her but it is a long process and she is on the donor list.

We have been in the hospital for two hours now and they are getting her a room to stay the night. Her toxin levels are too high and her vital nutrients are too low. She looks like she is going to shatter. She has lost so much weight now that the bones just stick out everywhere. I hate all of this.

I just needed to vent I guess and maybe say that if you ever questioned giving an organ after death please think about it really hard. Lots of people tell me that they would but they are sick from certain diseases. It doesn't matter though. Mom has almost no liver now and is dying. If we don't transplant soon it will be too late and she will be gone. Even a sick liver is better than what she has now. She told the doctors she would take anything. She just doesn't want to die yet. I don't want to lose her.

I want today to be over. My dad took all my kids and I will go home and pass out. Then wake up and see how mom is doing and they will probably have her go home. I hate hospitals.

by on Nov. 22, 2012 at 7:10 PM
Replies (41-42):
by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 7:38 AM
Hugs & prayers.
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by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 7:42 AM
Oh damn I'm sorry! Here I am whining that we don't have leftovers I feel like poop. I hope your mom gets a new liver soon.
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