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If your kids were left out, would you still buy presents for theirs?

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Backstory: me and my fiance have been together two years, so one year last Christmas. He has been a part of my kids life since they were under a year for the youngster and under three years for my oldest.

Last Christmas we went to his moms families Christmas party. They do a white elephant except for the little kids who get gifts from everyone. We got gifts for the three little girls (art easel, art supplies and paper). When the time came to open gifts my kids (2 and 3 years at that time) did not get anything and watched while all the other kids opened presents and played with their new toys.

So my question is this year, do I buy presents for the little girls again even though my kids for left out? And would you be bothered by this or do you think that's normal? I was raised where anyone who was there got presents so I found it rude that not a single person even thought of my kids who they knew would be there.
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by on Dec. 3, 2012 at 3:58 PM
Replies (21-30):
by Bronze Member on Dec. 3, 2012 at 4:35 PM

 Maybe she can call them and tactfully ask if your kids will have presents there.  At their age, I'm sure they would be happy with a little $5 toy. 

Quoting Mommy4-27-08:

His parents just didn't bring anything because we do a Christmas thing with them on actual Christmas. His mom was really mad that her family left them out too because she calls them her grandkids and she feels like they just left them out. And it was hard, my kids didn't understand why they had nothing.

Quoting jujubear1:

 What mich.el.le said.  I'd turn the other cheek on this one, but I know that had to be hard for you as a mom to see your kids get nothing.  I'd take them something small to open just in case.  Maybe have df ask his mom this year beforehand so she doesn't forget.


by on Dec. 3, 2012 at 4:36 PM
2 moms liked this
No I wouldn't. I would probably not even go.
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by Silver Member on Dec. 3, 2012 at 4:38 PM
That's very rude! I would bring things for my kids to open & still buy stuff for the other kids too
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by Silver Member on Dec. 3, 2012 at 4:42 PM
1 mom liked this

We actually have something different that has apparently been going on since my husband was a kid. 

His mom's boyfriends family has always gone all out for the boyfriends kids.. but also gotten hubby something crappy. One year they gave hubby a pack of socks, that was opened and one pair of the socks was missing because the family had decided to take a pair of the socks and roll up a high amount of money in it and give it to the boyfriends kids. :\ 

They started to do this crap with my son, and I would not have it. We no longer attend their events. They ask every year and every year we just say sorry and that we already have plans. My son has a good enough Christmas here with me and hubby and we just go to hubby's mom's house when it's just her.

-:Logan Jacob:-

-:December 1st 2007:-

-:7 Pounds 4 Ounces:- 

-:My Everything:- 

by on Dec. 3, 2012 at 4:54 PM

Are you sure they knew you were coming to the party and that you have kids? Since it was probably your first time maybe they just didn't expect it. I would still get them something little, but if it happens again, they would never get another gift from me again in their lifetime :) If it happens again, it is no accident.

by Jamie on Dec. 3, 2012 at 4:56 PM

good idea!

Quoting jb0520:

I would buy for the kids but make sure my kids have something to open and play with

by on Dec. 3, 2012 at 5:00 PM
1 mom liked this

 I would just not go. I wouldn't tolerate that. My SOs family would never do that to my kids, that's just so sad. I don't think I would punish the little girls for their parents so I would probably still buy them a gift but I wouldn't show up and have my kids feelings hurt.

by on Dec. 3, 2012 at 5:07 PM
1 mom liked this
My two brothers never hardley get anyone anything but i have 4 nieces and nephews and i still get the kids something reguardless but im doing joint gifts like for two of my nephews im getting them a hot wheels wii game my niece is getting a ds game and so is my other niece. although they probaly wont get my kids anything i still get thier kids something because they r kids its not thier fault
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by on Dec. 3, 2012 at 5:16 PM

I agree. It's not the children's fault that the adults were jerks, but I would keep an extra present around for your kids just in case.

Quoting LucyHarper:

While it is rude that they didn't get your kids anything, its not the childrens fault that their parents didn't get your kids presents. I would never not buy children presents because their parents and grandparents didn't get my kids presents. 

by on Dec. 3, 2012 at 5:17 PM

I think your fiance should find out if there are going to be gifts for them.  If not, bring something for them to open at gift time, and decide if you are going to buy gifts for other kids.

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