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Please explain to me

Posted by on Dec. 9, 2012 at 1:58 AM
  • 26 Replies
What logical reason that an almost seven year old would have for not wiping his butt after he pooped? He says he doesn't wipe when he poops at school. Please tell me how to handle this......
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by on Dec. 9, 2012 at 1:58 AM
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Replies (1-10):
kansasmom1978
by on Dec. 9, 2012 at 2:03 AM

My 10 yr old ds has autism and I have to constantly tell him to wipe his butt. He also sits on the toilet with the seat up to poop, ew. I asked why he does not wipe, and he said idk. Gross in my opinion. Not to mention your butt itches if it's dirty

Ninjascreenname
by Member on Dec. 9, 2012 at 2:06 AM
He says his stepmother wipes his butt for him, and as of four moths ago-she bathed him also.


Quoting kansasmom1978:

My 10 yr old ds has autism and I have to constantly tell him to wipe his butt. He also sits on the toilet with the seat up to poop, ew. I asked why he does not wipe, and he said idk. Gross in my opinion. Not to mention your butt itches if it's dirty


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kansasmom1978
by on Dec. 9, 2012 at 2:08 AM

We still bathe our 10 yr old. But just washing his hair, because he can't get the shampoo all out. He's learning. My dd is 7 and she has just gotten to where she can shower alone. Perhaps it was cuz i just helped her idk, but now I just make sure she has a towel and I check her hair.

Quoting Ninjascreenname:

He says his stepmother wipes his butt for him, and as of four moths ago-she bathed him also.


Quoting kansasmom1978:

My 10 yr old ds has autism and I have to constantly tell him to wipe his butt. He also sits on the toilet with the seat up to poop, ew. I asked why he does not wipe, and he said idk. Gross in my opinion. Not to mention your butt itches if it's dirty



divinedimension
by Bronze Member on Dec. 9, 2012 at 2:08 AM

It's just a boy thing, I think. Two of my boys had issues with wiping for awhile. One of them until age 5 (granted this one is autistic and slowed significantly developmentally speaking) and the other well..he is age 6 and sitll won't wipe his ass at all. 


Ninjascreenname
by Member on Dec. 9, 2012 at 3:03 AM
Im the noncustodial in this situation. I am in the process of having that changed asap though. He is seriously neglected. I posted and asked about this, but it's just mind boggling. My two year old knows all this, why doesn't my almost seven year old? I know you're going to be all, "why do you say he is neglected" but they can't take him to school for some unknown reason, or they take him late. He's been late fifteen times, and he has missed ten days unexcused, and two excused. Add that in to him not knowing how to bathe himself or wipe himself, and I just don't know what else we aren't seeing. He reeked of BO and I made him take a bath (obviously) and I trimmed his nails. According tohim he doesn't remember when he took his last bath and he doesn't know why you trim your nails because "they just break off." What.the.fuck?


Quoting Momof38186:

Sit him down and re-explain  to him WHY he needs to wipe. Let him know he'll get sore & can get an infection. Let him know he'll itch and everyone will tease him when he scratch's .  Tell him He'll smell bad & that he'll get hurt feelings when people tease him  for smelling bad & scratching himself all the time.  Be honest with him.  I have a daughter that  leaves quite a bit behind in her undies & I have to explain this to her often. She just doesn't seem to grasp it either.  I just keep  re-explaining it & She's starting to get much better.  She doesn't like the idea of people  teasing her or staring at her or talking bad about her because she'll stink or be scratching herself and she doesn't like the idea of hurting and itching either  or getting really sick from an infection.  If he doesn't listen to you  , ask his Doctor to talk to him. Sometimes kids need to hear it from someone else


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Ninjascreenname
by Member on Dec. 9, 2012 at 3:05 AM
Im disgusted. I don't know what to think about this. I know that I will be calling my lawyer Monday morning at 8 am. This is just gross. I am highly upset that he doesn't know how to do this, and that he thinks it is okay to not wipe.




EW.


Quoting Momof38186:

If he's 7 years old,he's WAY too old  for her to be wiping his behind.   Now, if he NEEDS help in the tub still, that's understandable, but he really shouldn't still need help ,as the only help a child at that age should need is hair washing if they have long hair  or if they have disabilities ( I guess I just assumed he didn't ,so maybe he does  & does need help ? ))   7 years old  is  old enough to bathe and wipe himself and it's very odd  for a STEPmom to be doing that for him  in my opinion. I'd be pretty upset  if I found out another woman was  bathing my child and wiping his hind end  when he was that old.


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Ninjascreenname
by Member on Dec. 9, 2012 at 3:27 AM
Thank you so much.


Quoting Momof38186:

OH BIG Hugs mama, you're doing the right thing. Somethings not right over there  & you are right to be concerned & getting  the lawyer involved. There's just no excuse for all of that.  I'm glad he's got a good mom like you ,to make sure there's an end to all of this *hugs* so sorry he's having to go through it at all

Quoting Ninjascreenname:

Im disgusted. I don't know what to think about this. I know that I will be calling my lawyer Monday morning at 8 am. This is just gross. I am highly upset that he doesn't know how to do this, and that he thinks it is okay to not wipe.









EW.





Quoting Momof38186:

If he's 7 years old,he's WAY too old  for her to be wiping his behind.   Now, if he NEEDS help in the tub still, that's understandable, but he really shouldn't still need help ,as the only help a child at that age should need is hair washing if they have long hair  or if they have disabilities ( I guess I just assumed he didn't ,so maybe he does  & does need help ? ))   7 years old  is  old enough to bathe and wipe himself and it's very odd  for a STEPmom to be doing that for him  in my opinion. I'd be pretty upset  if I found out another woman was  bathing my child and wiping his hind end  when he was that old.





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Ninjascreenname
by Member on Dec. 9, 2012 at 4:05 AM
I don't mind at all, thank you so much.


Quoting Momof38186:

You're welcome :-)  You'll get to the bottom of it & in the meantime I'll keep you & Your son  in my thoughts  & Prayers ( if you don't mind )

Quoting Ninjascreenname:

Thank you so much.





Quoting Momof38186:

OH BIG Hugs mama, you're doing the right thing. Somethings not right over there  & you are right to be concerned & getting  the lawyer involved. There's just no excuse for all of that.  I'm glad he's got a good mom like you ,to make sure there's an end to all of this *hugs* so sorry he's having to go through it at all

Quoting Ninjascreenname:

Im disgusted. I don't know what to think about this. I know that I will be calling my lawyer Monday morning at 8 am. This is just gross. I am highly upset that he doesn't know how to do this, and that he thinks it is okay to not wipe.














EW.








Quoting Momof38186:

If he's 7 years old,he's WAY too old  for her to be wiping his behind.   Now, if he NEEDS help in the tub still, that's understandable, but he really shouldn't still need help ,as the only help a child at that age should need is hair washing if they have long hair  or if they have disabilities ( I guess I just assumed he didn't ,so maybe he does  & does need help ? ))   7 years old  is  old enough to bathe and wipe himself and it's very odd  for a STEPmom to be doing that for him  in my opinion. I'd be pretty upset  if I found out another woman was  bathing my child and wiping his hind end  when he was that old.









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Ninjascreenname
by Member on Dec. 9, 2012 at 4:09 AM
I went MiA for a year and came back to this type of cafemom. I was here from the start, just as someone else. :/ Thank you for your kind words, it really was needed. I didn't know where else to ask, you know?


Quoting Momof38186:

ANYtime hun.  Support is what this site's really made for-- not all this catty bashing and pettiness that makes up the majority on here now-a-days :-(   *hugs*

Quoting Ninjascreenname:

I don't mind at all, thank you so much.





Quoting Momof38186:

You're welcome :-)  You'll get to the bottom of it & in the meantime I'll keep you & Your son  in my thoughts  & Prayers ( if you don't mind )

Quoting Ninjascreenname:

Thank you so much.








Quoting Momof38186:

OH BIG Hugs mama, you're doing the right thing. Somethings not right over there  & you are right to be concerned & getting  the lawyer involved. There's just no excuse for all of that.  I'm glad he's got a good mom like you ,to make sure there's an end to all of this *hugs* so sorry he's having to go through it at all

Quoting Ninjascreenname:

Im disgusted. I don't know what to think about this. I know that I will be calling my lawyer Monday morning at 8 am. This is just gross. I am highly upset that he doesn't know how to do this, and that he thinks it is okay to not wipe.



















EW.











Quoting Momof38186:

If he's 7 years old,he's WAY too old  for her to be wiping his behind.   Now, if he NEEDS help in the tub still, that's understandable, but he really shouldn't still need help ,as the only help a child at that age should need is hair washing if they have long hair  or if they have disabilities ( I guess I just assumed he didn't ,so maybe he does  & does need help ? ))   7 years old  is  old enough to bathe and wipe himself and it's very odd  for a STEPmom to be doing that for him  in my opinion. I'd be pretty upset  if I found out another woman was  bathing my child and wiping his hind end  when he was that old.














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goldilocksbecky
by on Dec. 9, 2012 at 7:52 AM

Keep in mind that if he's never actually been taught how to do it properly, you'll have to do that, no matter howold he is.  And that involves more than just showing him once.  You'll need to monitor it for a while until he gets enough practice to be good at it.  Flushable wipes might be helpful.

Also, as a first grade teacher, I have to tell you that the toilet paper at schools is pretty much a joke.  Even kids who do a decent job of wiping at home can't always do a good job with the cheapo stuff they have at school.  So expect it to not be the best.  If he poops at school a lot, you might want to have him keep wipes in his bookbag or something.  (I keep some at school for my kids to use.  They are in an area that they can get to without being noticed and I tell them to get one on the way to the bathroom if they need it.  I just have a conversation about the bad toiletpaper at the beginning of the year.  I don't want them uncomfortable and I sure don't want to smell poop all day.)

Also, regardless of their age, there may be times that they need help.  Like if they are sick and have diarrhea.  It's perfectly fine for them to know that sometimes people (doctors, caregivers) have to see/touch your body when you are sick.

 

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