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is it fair?

Posted by on Dec. 11, 2012 at 8:46 AM
  • 68 Replies
OK so my SO and I do not share Money. We have an account for bills we both put money into and then we have our personal accounts. He travels for work, jobs have been close enough to home that they have been coming home every night. Well this week its farther away so he will be gone from this morning until about Saturday. Every week we both put in 40 for groceries, so we spend 80 on groceries a week. Is it fair for me to still ask for grocery money on weeks he isn't going to be home? I feel bad for taking it, but on the other hand I get paid every two weeks. I budget my money so the bills I need to pay get paid and set aside $80 for the two weeks in groceries. I also budget enough money to get me through with gas and any extras I get throughout the two weeks. Anything extra I pay extra on my truck payment. So with that said with it being last minute when he finds out when and where he's working which is always Mondays and he leaves or starts the job on Tuesday. I do not budget to cover groceries by myself so when he leaves in a day notice it would really screw me to just cover it and not worry about it. Do you think its fair to have him still pay for half the groceries?
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by on Dec. 11, 2012 at 8:46 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Due9
by on Dec. 11, 2012 at 8:51 AM
3 moms liked this

He has a responsibility to help his family. Of course he should pay for groceries.

Msgme
by Platinum Member on Dec. 11, 2012 at 8:58 AM
1 mom liked this

Of course he should pay.   The food is eaten by the household which is half of his responsibility. 

AjCeCeMom
by Ruby Member on Dec. 11, 2012 at 8:59 AM
Absolutely yes!
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kjsaes
by on Dec. 11, 2012 at 9:00 AM
My girls are not his children, yes I realize when you get into a relationship with someone who has prior kids the right thing to do is take them on. But on the other hand I don't expect anyone to take care of my kids other then me. I just feel like hes not going to be home to eat anything I buy, and its my responsibility to make sure they have what they need. I feel bad making him short on money due to having to eat out all week to make sure there is food in the house for the week. Its kinda like he's paying for his meals twice.


Quoting Due9:

He has a responsibility to help his family. Of course he should pay for groceries.


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arilolojrsmom
by on Dec. 11, 2012 at 9:00 AM


Quoting Msgme:

Of course he should pay.   The food is eaten by the household which is half of his responsibility. 

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christina0607
by on Dec. 11, 2012 at 9:02 AM
2 moms liked this

Of course it's fair. Honestly I have to say I think it's rather silly that you have to wonder if it's fair for your SO to feed his own family.

Make someone happy today, mind your own business.

Due9
by on Dec. 11, 2012 at 9:04 AM

I still have to stick by what I believe and that is, he should be helping with the household. To me, it is not acceptable to hold money just because of being out of town. That is weird. Why don't you two get a bank account to share?

Quoting kjsaes:

My girls are not his children, yes I realize when you get into a relationship with someone who has prior kids the right thing to do is take them on. But on the other hand I don't expect anyone to take care of my kids other then me. I just feel like hes not going to be home to eat anything I buy, and its my responsibility to make sure they have what they need. I feel bad making him short on money due to having to eat out all week to make sure there is food in the house for the week. Its kinda like he's paying for his meals twice.


Quoting Due9:

He has a responsibility to help his family. Of course he should pay for groceries.



juggling

kjsaes
by on Dec. 11, 2012 at 9:05 AM
We have one together that we put just bill money into.


Quoting Due9:

I still have to stick by what I believe and that is, he should be helping with the household. To me, it is not acceptable to hold money just because of being out of town. That is weird. Why don't you two get a bank account to share?

Quoting kjsaes:

My girls are not his children, yes I realize when you get into a relationship with someone who has prior kids the right thing to do is take them on. But on the other hand I don't expect anyone to take care of my kids other then me. I just feel like hes not going to be home to eat anything I buy, and its my responsibility to make sure they have what they need. I feel bad making him short on money due to having to eat out all week to make sure there is food in the house for the week. Its kinda like he's paying for his meals twice.





Quoting Due9:

He has a responsibility to help his family. Of course he should pay for groceries.





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notjstasocermom
by Samantha on Dec. 11, 2012 at 9:09 AM


Quoting christina0607:

Of course it's fair. Honestly I have to say I think it's rather silly that you have to wonder if it's fair for your SO to feed his own family.


emilysmom8
by Dawn on Dec. 11, 2012 at 9:13 AM
1 mom liked this

 In a way I want to say he should help pay for groceries, but than again he has to buy his own food while he is away. which is going to cost him alot of money (more than $40). Maybe talk to him and ask if he can stil put in the $40 but dont get upset if he wont because like I said he is going to be spending a lot on food for him self while he is away..

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