Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

The CafeMom Newcomers Club The CafeMom Newcomers Club

Should we go to my grandmother's birthday dinner or not?

Posted by on Jan. 20, 2013 at 4:08 PM
  • 17 Replies

My grandma is turning 70 on the 26th. A few days ago I called my mom and asked her what she was planning for her mom. She told me that my uncle was planning to take her out to dinner with his family. She told my grandma that she wanted to go and was going to call her cousins to invite them too. My mom also told me that everyone would pay for them selves. I told her as long as I know a few days ahead that should not be a problem. Later on I call my grandma and she tells me  that my uncle planned this over a month ago and how he just wanted her, his kids, and wife.(I think he didn't even want my grandpa or his little brother to go too)  However my grandma  told my uncle that everyone should be able to go after talking with my mom. The thing that kinda rubbed me the wrong way is that she kept telling me over and over that everyone has to pay for them selves. I mean she must of told me 4 times during that phone call and I completely understand. We have been out to dinner with the whole family many times before and there was only once after my husband's surgery when they offered to pay for us and we didn't even ask them to!! I don't expect anyone to pay for us!  Yes we are on a tight budget now but I have been saving money in case we need it and my grandma is turning 70. No one has any details of the place or time when I called them and I just feel like if they are not going to let me know anything then I don't think I will go.  I think I should just bake her a Cheesecake and drop it off the day after.

by on Jan. 20, 2013 at 4:08 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
JulyBabies
by Platinum Member on Jan. 20, 2013 at 4:17 PM
1 mom liked this

If it was an organized event, then I would definitely suggest that you go. But it sounds like you are unable to get firm details so I would celebrate with her separately.

momavanessa
by Bronze Member on Jan. 20, 2013 at 4:23 PM

Yeah it is very confusing what is going on so I think I will skip it. Plus my sister is coming the day afterwards.


Quoting JulyBabies:

If it was an organized event, then I would definitely suggest that you go. But it sounds like you are unable to get firm details so I would celebrate with her separately.



Paperfishies
by on Jan. 20, 2013 at 4:28 PM
2 moms liked this

Take her out to dinner with just your family on another day.

Alyssasmommy412
by Silver Member on Jan. 20, 2013 at 5:33 PM

This

Quoting Paperfishies:

Take her out to dinner with just your family on another day.


coolmommy2x
by Ruby Member on Jan. 20, 2013 at 5:36 PM
That's what I was going to say.

Quoting Paperfishies:

Take her out to dinner with just your family on another day.

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
connie45
by Gold Member on Jan. 20, 2013 at 5:45 PM
Find out where they are taking her and take her somewhere alot nicer the day before. Tee her.

And no Golden Corral or Olive Garden is not nicer.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Bax
by on Jan. 20, 2013 at 6:29 PM

Why not give your grandma 2 dinners out. Let your uncle have his dinner with her and then you, mom and the rest have another celebration.  Your grandma doesn't seem to have had a problem with it just being your uncles family, it wasn't until your mom got involved that it became an extended family affair.

boys2men2soon
by Silver Member on Jan. 20, 2013 at 6:34 PM

If details are not forthcoming, I agree with the cheesecake idea.     If Grandma asks why you weren't at dinner, tell her the truth.

DomesticDoll
by on Jan. 20, 2013 at 6:36 PM
I say let your uncle and his fam take her and politely tell her you're going I take her out one night with just your family!

I totally understand the part about saying over and over "you have to pay for yourself" we're on a budget too, and whenever my in laws invite us to go out to dinner or whatever they always say " but everyone is paying for themselves" I don't need to be told we're paying for ourselves! We ALWAYS pay for us and our 3 kids! We sometimes just pay the whole bill theirs too!!! So reminding us that we're paying for our family is not necessary ! Or I feel like saying to them- if u have to remind us to pay for our own bill- even though we always do... DON'T INVITE us!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Chelsey191
by Silver Member on Jan. 20, 2013 at 6:45 PM
I would plan another dinner for her with everyone and I would specifically not invite him and his family and I would plan another dinner every year specifically not inviting him. He sounds like a jerk.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN