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Are you planning to put your parents in a nursing home?

I refuse to. I've been in some "nice" ones and I've been in some "bad" ones. Abuse happens in all of them. Don't be daft and think it doesn't or can't.

***Yes,I realize that some people have "no other choice" than to put their parents in a home.I'm not directing this at you.***

 However, most do it because they can't work taking care of their elderly parents into their busy family schedules. It's a good thing your parents didn't feel the same way about you when YOU were helpless and dependent on them. 

If your parents were assholes...then do what you want. But if your parents loved you and did their best for you...why would you put them through this?

 

by on Jan. 25, 2013 at 10:09 PM
Replies (21-30):
greenie63
by Nancy on Jan. 25, 2013 at 10:37 PM

My mother passed in 2007, she and my father lived in a retirement community, a ranch style home where they lived with other seniors independently. After my mom passed, my father went downhill, he has dementia. He is in a nursing home, he sleeps about 98% of the time, hardly eating, his few waking moments are horrible with yelling about his past. He mixes things that happened with his job and being in WWII (he's a veteran). There isn't much we can do at this point, he's almost 87. 


Mrs.Pedro
by Silver Member on Jan. 25, 2013 at 10:37 PM
Nope. I will never let my mom or dad go to one. If they needed more in depth care I might go for hospice, but idk. I can see my parents needing a lot of care when they're older. If I can do it myself I will... I will at least do it for my mom, and help my sister care for my dad financially since he and my mom aren't together. It makes me scared to think about the future of my parents being too old and disabled to care for themselves alone :(
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stacefaceninja
by on Jan. 25, 2013 at 10:42 PM

Me too. I can honestly say that is my biggest fear. It's scary because you don't get to wonder "Will it happen"...you have to wonder " When is it going to happen, and how bad will it get until it's all over?"

I still have both of my parents...and I will do anything I have to do to care or them at home until the day they die. 

Quoting Mrs.Pedro:

Nope. I will never let my mom or dad go to one. If they needed more in depth care I might go for hospice, but idk. I can see my parents needing a lot of care when they're older. If I can do it myself I will... I will at least do it for my mom, and help my sister care for my dad financially since he and my mom aren't together. It makes me scared to think about the future of my parents being too old and disabled to care for themselves alone :(


-If for any reason you feel an urge to correct my grammar, spelling, or punctuation, please suppress this urge. You are not important enough to me to spend time editing before I post.  I will just laugh at you-

stacefaceninja
by on Jan. 25, 2013 at 10:47 PM

My heart honestly hurts for you. It's just not a decision I could make. I would want him at home. Just in case.

Quoting greenie63:

My mother passed in 2007, she and my father lived in a retirement community, a ranch style home where they lived with other seniors independently. After my mom passed, my father went downhill, he has dementia. He is in a nursing home, he sleeps about 98% of the time, hardly eating, his few waking moments are horrible with yelling about his past. He mixes things that happened with his job and being in WWII (he's a veteran). There isn't much we can do at this point, he's almost 87. 



balagan_imma
by Bronze Member on Jan. 25, 2013 at 10:47 PM

The truth I s that you can never know what can happen with their health. When FIL was deemed terminal he asked to go to a nursing home. He begged because I had young children and MIL wouldn't have been able to care for him on her own. They treated him like a king for the 4 days he was there (he entered on Tues. and died on Fri.)

trachmom312
by Bronze Member on Jan. 25, 2013 at 10:51 PM
1 mom liked this
It is my parents wish to go to a nursing home. They do not want my brother or me taking care of them in old age. My Mom also says it was her job/ resposability to take care of her children. Not a her children's job to take care of her.
ChocolateJunky
by on Jan. 25, 2013 at 10:53 PM

I actually agree with this. I've done some internships where I had to visit a few nursing homes, and it was just depressing. I couldn't do that. I'd like to think that when the time comes, I'll find a way to make it work for all of us. Although it would be interesting having my parents live with me since they're divorced...

greenie63
by Nancy on Jan. 25, 2013 at 10:53 PM

It is a matter of safety. For him in addition to our children. At one point he became combative and was hitting people. 

Quoting stacefaceninja:

My heart honestly hurts for you. It's just not a decision I could make. I would want him at home. Just in case.

Quoting greenie63:

My mother passed in 2007, she and my father lived in a retirement community, a ranch style home where they lived with other seniors independently. After my mom passed, my father went downhill, he has dementia. He is in a nursing home, he sleeps about 98% of the time, hardly eating, his few waking moments are horrible with yelling about his past. He mixes things that happened with his job and being in WWII (he's a veteran). There isn't much we can do at this point, he's almost 87. 




nebcutie
by Gold Member on Jan. 25, 2013 at 10:55 PM
We will take them all in but my MIL will go in a home because she needs to be around alot of people. She already knows where she is going. Lol
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mybabysmama35
by on Jan. 25, 2013 at 10:57 PM

I don't plan on putting mine in a home. They took care of me for 18 years so the least I can do is return the favor. I'll do everything in my power to keep them out of a nursing home.

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