Questions Regarding Adoption (Piog) EDIT. Spoke with a lawyer

[DayDreamer1201]

Dh and I have been ttc for about 9mo with no luck. A friend of mine is due July 7th. 

She asked if we wanted to adopt her daughter. We have a 3yr old son. 

Dh and I both agreed to the adoption. 

Here's the complications. She was married when she got pregnant. They are no longer married and she hasn't seen him. My questions are: Will he have to sign the adoption papers? Since I live in a different state, will it cause problems? What advice can you give us?

She says he wants nothing to do with the baby. but doesn't know if he will sign the adoption papers. Help?

EDIT: Spoke with a lawyer: Here are my notes.

First step is to find an adoption agency. Mother will need to receive relinquishment counseling and they will work with her to complete the legal process.

Father will need to be notified of the adoption, and agree to it. He will be notified of a court hearing to relinquish his rights.

Since we are in different states, Wyoming has to license me as an Adoptive Home. We will need home visits and Will also need 6 months plus of supervision after the child is born before the adoption is finalized.

Even though it is a friend to friend adoption it still has to go through an agency. Costs are around $20,000.

Father MUST sigh his rights over because he is the “Presumed” father. Since Mother and he were married at time of conception.  

[MoLLiy]

I don't know about other states but in NH the mother has the right to not name the father and proceed on the adoption without his signature. The only exception to that is if he puts himself on the punative fathers registry then the courts will inform him of the pending adoption and he will have to consent for it to go through. Good luck!

[baby7810]

probably but it all depends on the state laws i'm guessing

[mcginnisc]

You need to consult an adoption attorney. In *most* states, the father has to sign TPR in order for placement. You will also have to undergo a homestudy to proceed. Your first step is to contact the attorney. 

[MommaGreenhalge]

I agree. Contact an attorney. Regardless of the laws, you are setting youself up for a world of hurt if you go through this without the father's consent.

[DayDreamer1201]

BUMP!