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Divorced Maiden Names?

Posted by on Mar. 14, 2013 at 10:37 PM
  • 15 Replies

So my soon to be XDH and I were married for 4 years and have 2 kids (ages 2+3) together. They both have my XDHs last name. When the divorce is finalized, should I go back to my maiden name? I have a BF and our relationship is moving rather steadily. Eventually ending in marriage and kids of our own. Should I go through the hassle of changing my name back only to have to re-do all the papaerwork and such again when I remarry? Also should I keep his last name so I still have that connection with my kids or since it's gonna change anyway, does it matter? Or should I just combine the two even though it's really long?

by on Mar. 14, 2013 at 10:37 PM
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Replies (1-10):
CampClan
by Bronze Member on Mar. 14, 2013 at 11:06 PM
IMO why waste money to change it back to your maiden when you are changing it soon anyways? When my ex & I divorced he asked if I was going back & I said no because I have a son who is not his that we had his last name legally changed to our married name. I will not ever change my name unless I get married again.
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BrownEyedGirl86
by Platinum Member on Mar. 14, 2013 at 11:11 PM
I will never go back to my maiden name 2 reasons
1) hate my family don't wanna be associated w them.
2) my children have that last name and I want to as well.
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flowerfunleah
by Silver Member on Mar. 15, 2013 at 12:49 AM

If dh and I ever got divorced I wouldnt change my name back to my maiden name, I like my married name!

thatgirl70
by Carin on Mar. 15, 2013 at 12:55 AM

You're under no obligation to go back to your maiden name. If it's something you want to do, that's fine, if not you don't have to.

I would never go back to my maiden name. I hate it with a passion, and I want to share my name with my son. I probably would never get married again, and if I did, maybe I'd hyphenate, or keep my first married name.

Alrescha
by Ruby Member on Mar. 15, 2013 at 6:51 AM

When I filed for divorce they asked me if I wanted to change back, there wasn't a cost associated with it as long as I did it as part of the divorce. If I choose to change back now, however I'll have to pay for it.

But, I did stay with my married name. I'm not trying to go back to who I was before I got married or pretend it didn't happen and my daughter's have their father's name as well. Of course, I don't anticipate getting married again either.

Arwyn724
by on Mar. 15, 2013 at 12:39 PM
2 moms liked this

I have retained my maiden name (which I love) through two divorces.  My connection with my kids has nothing to do with a name, since they have two different fathers and last names themselves.  I will never change my name again.  I will die with the name I was born with.  My girls will change their names when they marry (one did already), so it was never that important to have the same last name.  My married daughter has a beautiful married name.

Arwyn 724 

25beengoodtome
by on Mar. 15, 2013 at 2:04 PM

Up to you. Personally, it's easier on the kids to have the same current last name as the family.

TotallyWarped
by on Mar. 15, 2013 at 5:14 PM
Well, their dad is still in their life (we have joint custody) so the kids wouldn't be taking my BF last name. They'd still have their dads. KWIM?
Quoting 25beengoodtome:

Up to you. Personally, it's easier on the kids to have the same current last name as the family.

iamtryingforme
by on Mar. 21, 2013 at 10:31 PM

I changed my name only because my dd kept calling me by my maiden name. It confuses people big time though. I get asked a lot are you her mother.She is my clone so if we are right next to each other I am like hello just look at us. You can always take the kids last name as your middle name and change your last name to either your maiden name or the new name when married.

dusky_rose
by Sue on Mar. 21, 2013 at 11:48 PM

When I got divorced I took my maiden name back. Then I got remarried down the road and took my current DH's last name. I can see not taking your maiden name back (to avoid the hassle of name changes), but if you have more children with your future DH, then you might want them to have the same last name as you.


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