What Would You Think? (Boyfriend says wrong name during something sexual)
So, I need to know what you all would make of this/do in this situation.
Last night, I was talking to my boyfriend. We have been together about a year and a half. We have never had any type of sexual relations yet. The most we've done is kissing/making out. We want to take things really slowly. I was married before I met him, and he has been married twice. He has kids with both of his ex wives, and I have kids with my ex husband. He and his 2nd wife got divorced almost 4 years ago, and they haven't even talked in 3 years. I won't go into a lot of details, but it was a bad break up, and they never really saw eye-to-eye on anything. She has kept their kids from him, and he has been fighting with the courts and her about getting to see them. Anyway, he talks about her quite often...I would say at least a couple of times a week, but it's always bad things. He talks about how they never got along, had nothing in common, all she did was nag and complain, never appreciated him, wasn't that good in bed, etc. The list goes on and on. He's also always comparing me to her, but in a good way. Like, "Oh, I am so glad that you are in to vacationing because she never was." or "I'm glad that you like that idea because she never gave it a chance". Anyway, he has never had anything nice to say about her except that she gave him two sons. I know him well enough to know that he's being honest with me, and that he feels nothing for her...at least nothing positive, but, here's the thing. Last night, we were talking, and he was telling me about something sexual that he wanted to try with me when the time is right, and he was getting really in to it, really detailed, and he said that he has masterbated to this thought, and then told me about a conversation that we have during his thought, and there is a part where I start to interupt what he is doing and he said, "No, (insert ex-wife's name here)". And he immediately knew that he screwed up because I just sat there, and he was like, "Oh, no, that was a set up, I was just kidding. I wanted to see if you'd catch it." And I could tell that he was embarrassed. And I said, "Wow...that really hurt." Then we just kind of let it go. I told him that I forgive him and it's not something that we need to dwell on, but my feelings will still be hurt for a bit because I don't understand why he would even say her name. I mean, I would understand if we were fighting and he yelled at me but said her name, because he's always talking about hating her and being angry with her, but during something sexual? I would think that the only reason for a name slip would be if you were thinking about the person who's name you said (which, why would you if you hate them?) or that was the last person that you were with and it was for a long time, so you just got used to it. The problem with the last one is that yes, she was the last person that he was sexual with, but it was 4.5 years ago, and he hasn't talked to her in 3 years, so I would think that he wouldn't be slipping up like that anymore. Also, this has never happened before.
And, before you ask..NO, there is no possibilty that he is sleeping with anyone else, or talking to his ex of anything. And I do trust him. I am just trying to figure out why this may have happened. I am really, really hurt by it. I am not angry. I just feel betrayed in a way I guess. What should I do? What should I think?