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Waiting until after college to concieve

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Why is it that so many moms on here advise that (poor) women wait until after they have graduated college and started a career to have another baby? What is easier about ttc while holding down a career. I just don't understand, wouldn't it be harder? Work is 5 plus days a week and college is 2-3 days each week, maybe even part time for some. It's a lighter time commitment. Can't a boss fire you if you are pregnant? How would that whole scenario even work?

by on Mar. 21, 2013 at 11:46 AM
Replies (41-47):
littlelamb303
by Member on Mar. 31, 2013 at 3:03 PM

 


Quoting LavenderMom23:

Maternity leave? Like two Weeks of calling in sick?

Quoting littlelamb303:

WHY?  When I was growing up, I was told college first, job, money, marriage and then kids.  That is the way it should be.  That is the ONLY right way to do it and my dd knows that as well.    I also had a professional job where I had benefits and maternity leave.  When you have a college education, you tend to get those kind of jobs.  Why is that so difficult to understand?   It bothers me when people don't do things in the order they should and then expect the government to bail them out.  Also, by the time I had a baby, I was MORE than ready, unlike some who had them too young.

I had 8 weeks paid maternity leave( I had a c section).  I was also already well established in my career.  I took a full year off, and my job was still there when I came back.  That is the difference between a professional job and a dead end job that requires no education.  It amazes me those on here that say they got no maternity leave. No calling in sick.  It was just given to us as one of the benefits.

 

Melissa_4
by on Mar. 31, 2013 at 3:06 PM

No, you cannot legally be fired for getting pregnant.  Waiting til you've got an established career (with good benefits) is wise because getting a degree requires full attention.  Babies are expensive, and the older and more established you are in your career, the better the money.  Plus, if you and the husband decide that one of you are going to stay at home with the little one, chances are both of you will have better salaries by that time.

LavenderMom23
by on Mar. 31, 2013 at 3:08 PM
Wow. What profession, if you don't mind?

Quoting littlelamb303:

 




Quoting LavenderMom23:

Maternity leave? Like two Weeks of calling in sick?


Quoting littlelamb303:


WHY?  When I was growing up, I was told college first, job, money, marriage and then kids.  That is the way it should be.  That is the ONLY right way to do it and my dd knows that as well.    I also had a professional job where I had benefits and maternity leave.  When you have a college education, you tend to get those kind of jobs.  Why is that so difficult to understand?   It bothers me when people don't do things in the order they should and then expect the government to bail them out.  Also, by the time I had a baby, I was MORE than ready, unlike some who had them too young.


I had 8 weeks paid maternity leave( I had a c section).  I was also already well established in my career.  I took a full year off, and my job was still there when I came back.  That is the difference between a professional job and a dead end job that requires no education.  It amazes me those on here that say they got no maternity leave. No calling in sick.  It was just given to us as one of the benefits.


 

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AjCeCeMom
by on Mar. 31, 2013 at 3:17 PM
That's pretty normal for a salaried position, I took three months fully paid.


Quoting LavenderMom23:

Wow. What profession, if you don't mind?



Quoting littlelamb303:

 






Quoting LavenderMom23:

Maternity leave? Like two Weeks of calling in sick?



Quoting littlelamb303:



WHY?  When I was growing up, I was told college first, job, money, marriage and then kids.  That is the way it should be.  That is the ONLY right way to do it and my dd knows that as well.    I also had a professional job where I had benefits and maternity leave.  When you have a college education, you tend to get those kind of jobs.  Why is that so difficult to understand?   It bothers me when people don't do things in the order they should and then expect the government to bail them out.  Also, by the time I had a baby, I was MORE than ready, unlike some who had them too young.



I had 8 weeks paid maternity leave( I had a c section).  I was also already well established in my career.  I took a full year off, and my job was still there when I came back.  That is the difference between a professional job and a dead end job that requires no education.  It amazes me those on here that say they got no maternity leave. No calling in sick.  It was just given to us as one of the benefits.



 


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ShadowLark
by Platinum Member on Mar. 31, 2013 at 3:37 PM


My MIL died at 65, 5 days after her birthday.  It happens.  She was perfectly healthy until she slipped on some ice and landed HARD on her head.  Vascular dementia and a crappy nursing home killed her.

I say let her ttc if she wants.  What's wrong with having the baby a couple of years "early"?  And if she were MY daughter, part of the deal would be that I provide free childcare for that child she so generously let me see while she finishes school!

Quoting romanceparty4u:


Do you really think they'll die that quickly? My parents had 20 years with my girls....and they were 41 when they had me. They expected me to finish school prior to marriage and conception.

They aren't old, they're just getting started, IMO.

Quoting Momma2Be135:

My parents are 61 and 62 snd im 20 so yea i was a late baby when they had me.





RADmomma
by on Mar. 31, 2013 at 6:02 PM
I think it all depends on your individual situation. My DH & I both worked full time when we got pregnant with our oldest. We weren't trying but I worked 50 hours minimum until I was put on bed rest at 8 months. Then my location went out of business so I didn't have a job to return to. The best thing for us was for me to be a sahm. 6 years later I still am a sahm. But if I needed a job it would be easier to find a good job with a college education.
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ShadowLark
by Platinum Member on Mar. 31, 2013 at 6:46 PM



Quoting RADmomma:

I think it all depends on your individual situation. My DH & I both worked full time when we got pregnant with our oldest. We weren't trying but I worked 50 hours minimum until I was put on bed rest at 8 months. Then my location went out of business so I didn't have a job to return to. The best thing for us was for me to be a sahm. 6 years later I still am a sahm. But if I needed a job it would be easier to find a good job with a college education.


But would it?  Say you're a SAHM for 10 years.  Wouldn't you need extensive retraining in your field before your knowledge from ten years ago is relevant again?  Maybe it would be better to get the degree at a time when you KNOW you can use it as soon as you graduate.

If the kids are so little that you can't survive College, how on Earth are you supposed to work outside of the home anyway?  And if the kids are old enough that you can work, then what's a bit of homework?

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