10 years ago, when my DH and I started dating, his oldest brother wouldn't let their parents see his Ds. I come from a big, close family, and couldn't imagine, ever, under any circumstance not allowing the in laws to see( or say my OWN parents) their grandchildren.
Fast forward to the present day, I married into the family, had 3 kids and am now expected #4. It's been 10 years. Ive had a great relationship, in the beginning, with my DHs parents. My parents and his parents have "hung out". My mother has gone for lunch with his mother ect.
Over the years there has been normal, annoying, irritating, lyeing, and crossing the line behaviour. My DH can't stand his parents, and I've always pushed the relationship because, they ARE his parents. Well now, they have really truly crossed the line. I can't put up anymore. I dont want them around me, in my home, or around my children. I told my MIL that my DH and I were really upset at what they had done, and thought it was best she didn't come to my DS!s birthday, which is next weekend.
I don't beleive in using kids as leverage, I just don't want them in my life anymore. I don't trust them, at all. Would you let your children have a relationship with people you don't trust?
So, she has sent gifts for the kids for Easter. I don't want to give the kids the gifts, because I feel like then they should call and thank their grandparents for the gifts. My Ds, could very likely invite them to his party, which I told them not to come to, and she would probably make me the bad guy and say I wont let them come. (She's very manipulative, and WOULD use the kids to try to guilt me)
So, what do I do?