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Dating after divorce..

Posted by on May. 20, 2013 at 3:46 PM
  • 6 Replies
I have been divorced for almost 2 years, and I have been with my boyfriend now for almost 18 months. My kids love him, but my ex is bitter about me dating. He tells my kids that my bf has issues, tells them they can't hug him or get close to him, and tells them that my bf is just trying to replace him. Now my 7 yr old is acting like a snobby brat to my bf, and my 4 yr old acts torn because she likes him but thinks she shouldn't.. this hurts my bf, because he loves my kids and just wants to be a part of my kids' lives, not replace their dad. Has anyone else been through this? Any advice?
by on May. 20, 2013 at 3:46 PM
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Replies (1-6):
M.I.A...P.O.W
by Silver Member on May. 20, 2013 at 3:49 PM
1 mom liked this

I have not been through it with much younger children. All I can suggest is you and bf keep doing what yall have been doing.

LuLuRex
by Silver Member on May. 20, 2013 at 4:39 PM

Have you talked to you ex about it? ((hugs))


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Rampgirl04
by on May. 20, 2013 at 4:49 PM

First of all OP, your Kids are absolutely ADORABLE. Sorry for the caps but I couldn't help myself. I am actually a divorced mom as well. All I can say is I definetly can kinda relate to how your ex husband is feeling as far as not wanting your new man to be involved with your kids HOWEVER, what he is doing isn't right and will probably back fire on him down the line. All you can do is be the better person and if your lovely Boyfriend really loves you and the kids he will stick by your side no matter how stressful this situation is.

ArmyMomx2grlz
by on May. 21, 2013 at 9:04 AM

I have talked to him, but it's like talking to a brick wall.. He doesn't see anything wrong with it, and tells me that he is the only dad those kids will ever have, and that my bf has no business trying to be in their lives. He is impossible to deal with.

ArmyMomx2grlz
by on May. 21, 2013 at 9:08 AM

Thank you. Yes, it will backfire on him, things usually do, because he is so self focused, that he only sees things how he wants to see them. The kids are allowed to hug and get close to his on again/off again gf, but not my steady bf. He constantly talks bad about me and my bf. The kids will learn.. they are smart. They will see how things really are.

kss12
by Member on May. 21, 2013 at 9:16 AM
I have been in your bf's shoes. Ss didn't act different though.. At a young age he knew his mom was miserable and crazy! It did bother me when ss would come home and ask me if I was trying to take over moms role, asked me if I liked him (BM said I hated him and was trying to get rid of him), and a ton of other things. I would address them with him and dh would talk to him as well. Our go to was "we can't control what your mom says, but you love being here over being there, you have fun here, and you get quiet and upset when you have to go to your moms so enjoy your time here, stop worrying about what others say, and just try to ignore anything negative that is said to you". That fixed his worries. If I were you, I'd talk to ex and tell him that it's not fair for him to be brainwashing your kids. He gets nothing out
Of it, but it hurts your kids in the long run
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