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bad parent

Posted by on Jun. 27, 2013 at 7:03 AM
  • 36 Replies
1 mom liked this

Do you think if a parent just takes there scheduled time nothing more that is a bad parent? 

by on Jun. 27, 2013 at 7:03 AM
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Replies (1-10):
LilliesValley
by on Jun. 27, 2013 at 7:06 AM

I think you need to fill us in more? Do you mean a divorced parent? A parent with a custody arrangement?? That sort of thing? Little more would be helpful.

NDADanceMom
by on Jun. 27, 2013 at 7:34 AM
No. That would mean i think an active duty soldier is a bad parent. One of the teachers at my school had to go overseas for a year about 7 years ago. Was he a bad parent?
AAP1988
by on Jun. 27, 2013 at 7:37 AM

That is a differen't situation. IMO my oldest sons father is a terrible father. He sees our son 12 hours a week (his choice) Never calls our son, rarely accepts or asks for extra time. 


Quoting NDADanceMom:

No. That would mean i think an active duty soldier is a bad parent. One of the teachers at my school had to go overseas for a year about 7 years ago. Was he a bad parent?



NDADanceMom
by on Jun. 27, 2013 at 7:47 AM
1 mom liked this
You need to stop fixating on what he is doing and worry about yourself. I'm a teacher and many kids only see one parent on a regular basis and they are just fine.
Maybe he would spend more time if you just let it go. Why don't you spend 2 months allowing him to come and go as he pleases. Don't comment that he needs to take your son overnight, just let him drop the kid off at 9. If he's up late? Don't complain. Its just a couple months. See if your behavior is driving the man away.
I suggest you both take a parenting class. Here in Minnesota they are called "parents forever" and its offered by the counties. You learn how to treat your x so that it doesn't interfere with the relationship your child has with either of you.
One day your x may tell your son that he wasn't around because you made it hard. I'm guessing your son by then will know you pretty well and believe it.


Quoting AAP1988:

That is a differen't situation. IMO my oldest sons father is a terrible father. He sees our son 12 hours a week (his choice) Never calls our son, rarely accepts or asks for extra time. 



Quoting NDADanceMom:

No. That would mean i think an active duty soldier is a bad parent. One of the teachers at my school had to go overseas for a year about 7 years ago. Was he a bad parent?




AAP1988
by on Jun. 27, 2013 at 7:55 AM

I tell him he can take our son whenever he wants but that he has to have him back by 7. So he isn't up all night. If not he has to keep him overnight 9 does not work for me. I don't think I make it hard I offer him extra time atleast 2 to 3 times a week. 


Quoting NDADanceMom:

You need to stop fixating on what he is doing and worry about yourself. I'm a teacher and many kids only see one parent on a regular basis and they are just fine.
Maybe he would spend more time if you just let it go. Why don't you spend 2 months allowing him to come and go as he pleases. Don't comment that he needs to take your son overnight, just let him drop the kid off at 9. If he's up late? Don't complain. Its just a couple months. See if your behavior is driving the man away.
I suggest you both take a parenting class. Here in Minnesota they are called "parents forever" and its offered by the counties. You learn how to treat your x so that it doesn't interfere with the relationship your child has with either of you.
One day your x may tell your son that he wasn't around because you made it hard. I'm guessing your son by then will know you pretty well and believe it.


Quoting AAP1988:

That is a differen't situation. IMO my oldest sons father is a terrible father. He sees our son 12 hours a week (his choice) Never calls our son, rarely accepts or asks for extra time. 



Quoting NDADanceMom:

No. That would mean i think an active duty soldier is a bad parent. One of the teachers at my school had to go overseas for a year about 7 years ago. Was he a bad parent?






NDADanceMom
by on Jun. 27, 2013 at 8:02 AM
1 mom liked this
I know that. I'm telling you to back off of that. Train your kid better and look at your own ability to parent if you can't get your kid to go to bed at 9. Worry about yourself.
You fixate on your x and don't recognize ho you contribute to the situation. You don't listen to anyone, you blame others and you don't handle your own business. I would avoid you too!


Quoting AAP1988:

I tell him he can take our son whenever he wants but that he has to have him back by 7. So he isn't up all night. If not he has to keep him overnight 9 does not work for me. I don't think I make it hard I offer him extra time atleast 2 to 3 times a week. 



Quoting NDADanceMom:

You need to stop fixating on what he is doing and worry about yourself. I'm a teacher and many kids only see one parent on a regular basis and they are just fine.

Maybe he would spend more time if you just let it go. Why don't you spend 2 months allowing him to come and go as he pleases. Don't comment that he needs to take your son overnight, just let him drop the kid off at 9. If he's up late? Don't complain. Its just a couple months. See if your behavior is driving the man away.

I suggest you both take a parenting class. Here in Minnesota they are called "parents forever" and its offered by the counties. You learn how to treat your x so that it doesn't interfere with the relationship your child has with either of you.

One day your x may tell your son that he wasn't around because you made it hard. I'm guessing your son by then will know you pretty well and believe it.




Quoting AAP1988:

That is a differen't situation. IMO my oldest sons father is a terrible father. He sees our son 12 hours a week (his choice) Never calls our son, rarely accepts or asks for extra time. 




Quoting NDADanceMom:

No. That would mean i think an active duty soldier is a bad parent. One of the teachers at my school had to go overseas for a year about 7 years ago. Was he a bad parent?









Tammywhynot
by on Jun. 27, 2013 at 8:02 AM
I really think dads get a bad wrap, my hubby has 3 daughters with his ex wife, hes a long dist truck driver so is only home one maybe two days a week. He us constantly ringing and turning up at her house to pick the girls up, she takes them out when she knows its his days off and never answers the phone. Then she tells the girls that hes not been in touch and hes not interested cos we have 2 girls together. His ex even phone cops and told them my hubby had beat her so she could get a restaining order. Luckily for us my hubby was in another part of country and could prove it through work. But it took the police 7 months to chase this up and in that time my hubby was not allowed to see his girls. This nearly tore him apart. And all because his ex.had a new fella and she didnt want him to know. Not that he cared he just wanted to know what man was around hus daughters.
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MmySteph2
by on Jun. 27, 2013 at 8:11 AM
Ugh! Why do women continue to act like this? It drives me insane! My nieces mother is like that. Always making it extremely difficult for my brother to be the father he wants to be because things don't go exactly the way she thinks they should! She went as far as saying he kidnapped his own daughter when she found out he was having a paternity test done to prove she was his. The ones who get hurt the worst by all these things are the kids. And trust me, those kids will see later in life just who was the so called bad guy!
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AAP1988
by on Jun. 27, 2013 at 8:15 AM

If you say so. Sorry I guess you don't like me because you seem like you think fathers should be able to be in control of everything thats not how it happens. Maybe him as a father if he wants to keep him out late should be a parent and train him as well on his time as well. He has a lot of free time.

And actually I am a very good parent thank you. I am far from controlling I offer way more time then he has on his CO. I don't see how me telling my ex he can take our son whenever he wants as long as he is back on a reasonable time and he lets me know the day before. 


Quoting NDADanceMom:

I know that. I'm telling you to back off of that. Train your kid better and look at your own ability to parent if you can't get your kid to go to bed at 9. Worry about yourself.
You fixate on your x and don't recognize ho you contribute to the situation. You don't listen to anyone, you blame others and you don't handle your own business. I would avoid you too!


Quoting AAP1988:

I tell him he can take our son whenever he wants but that he has to have him back by 7. So he isn't up all night. If not he has to keep him overnight 9 does not work for me. I don't think I make it hard I offer him extra time atleast 2 to 3 times a week. 



Quoting NDADanceMom:

You need to stop fixating on what he is doing and worry about yourself. I'm a teacher and many kids only see one parent on a regular basis and they are just fine.

Maybe he would spend more time if you just let it go. Why don't you spend 2 months allowing him to come and go as he pleases. Don't comment that he needs to take your son overnight, just let him drop the kid off at 9. If he's up late? Don't complain. Its just a couple months. See if your behavior is driving the man away.

I suggest you both take a parenting class. Here in Minnesota they are called "parents forever" and its offered by the counties. You learn how to treat your x so that it doesn't interfere with the relationship your child has with either of you.

One day your x may tell your son that he wasn't around because you made it hard. I'm guessing your son by then will know you pretty well and believe it.




Quoting AAP1988:

That is a differen't situation. IMO my oldest sons father is a terrible father. He sees our son 12 hours a week (his choice) Never calls our son, rarely accepts or asks for extra time. 




Quoting NDADanceMom:

No. That would mean i think an active duty soldier is a bad parent. One of the teachers at my school had to go overseas for a year about 7 years ago. Was he a bad parent?











AAP1988
by on Jun. 27, 2013 at 8:17 AM
1 mom liked this

That is horrible! I don't like mothers that do that to their children's father. Yes some fathers get a bad wrap. When some other fathers really are.

When my son was younger I would chase him down to try to get him more involved then what he is and he would always decline to pick him up or come to things so now I offer extra time once in awhile. I told him if he wants it he needs to let me know because I am tired of having to chase him, and try to get him more involved in our sons lives. 

On the other hand my youngest sons dad is a WONDERFUL father. He takes him a lot. He takes extra time when offered he is a real dedicated father. 


Quoting Tammywhynot:

I really think dads get a bad wrap, my hubby has 3 daughters with his ex wife, hes a long dist truck driver so is only home one maybe two days a week. He us constantly ringing and turning up at her house to pick the girls up, she takes them out when she knows its his days off and never answers the phone. Then she tells the girls that hes not been in touch and hes not interested cos we have 2 girls together. His ex even phone cops and told them my hubby had beat her so she could get a restaining order. Luckily for us my hubby was in another part of country and could prove it through work. But it took the police 7 months to chase this up and in that time my hubby was not allowed to see his girls. This nearly tore him apart. And all because his ex.had a new fella and she didnt want him to know. Not that he cared he just wanted to know what man was around hus daughters.



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