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 Do you forgive people that make horrible mistakes? Like going off on you, or getting mad at something so tiny? If they apologize and change. Would you forgive them?

 

I have a friend that I've known since I was 7. She was 8. I was having an episode 2 years ago, and I went off on her for her continuously blowing off hanging out because it effected my kids (they would cry because all of a sudden they didn't get to hang out with their best friends- they were like 4 and 5). She would just make other plans. Well, we didn't talk for over a year. I asked her forgiveness and apologized and I let her cool off and left her alone for 2 years. I messaged her 4 months ago and asked how she was doing and we have been hanging out weekly since. She forgave me, but I completely understood if she chose not to.

Are you a forgiving person?

by on Jun. 30, 2013 at 5:22 AM
Replies (41-50):
IBNeaters
by on Jun. 30, 2013 at 8:19 PM
1 mom liked this

I'm sorry, but where in the Bible does it say we need to forgive in just 2 circumstances.  My ex NEVER even asked for forgiveness and doesn't even believe what he did was wrong.  So I should just hold onto that and be mad forever?  Uh, no!  I should forgive him--even if I never utter the words to him, "I forgive you".  As a previous poster stated, forgiveness isn't for the other person, it's for you.  If I only forgave ppl according to your standards, I'd be an ugly mess.  That doesn't mean I reconcile with my ex, I just have to move on in my heart.  The Bible teaches us to forgive in ALL situations.  I've had a pretty crappy life and have been through a lot of therapy to get to the place I am now and to understand that only through the power of Jesus, am I able to forgive those who have hurt me.  It's a work in progress as my sometimes my blood still boils when I talk to my ex, but I meditate and pray every day.  


Quoting Redwall:

We're only required (by the Bible) to forgive in two circumstances...they don't know what they did is hurtful in which case we need to explain it to them...and if they truly repent and ask for forgiveness. 

If I want to forgive more, that's not true repentance and I'm putting a stamp on bad behavior.



CharlotteRose
by Bronze Member on Jun. 30, 2013 at 8:27 PM

I try to be - depends on what happened and who did it -

NickandKodasMom
by on Jun. 30, 2013 at 8:29 PM
My now xh started sleeping with my best friend before he decided to end our marriage. He split with me 7 1/2 years ago. 2 days after Christmas while I was dealing with the fact that my mother was dying.(she died 2 1/2 months later) He had been sleeping with my best friend for over a month before we split and continued to have a relationship for the next 2 years. About a year after they split she and I started talking again and are now really good friends again. So I guess you can say that yes, I am a forgiving person. I now see the fact that she did me a favor. Lol.
crwspringer
by Platinum Member on Jun. 30, 2013 at 8:51 PM
I'm in a hard place with hubby right now. He has problem that he can't seem to recognize when to say enough when drinking. We had his dads retirement party yesterday and he went out drinking afterward. At 2 am I texted everyone he was with saying it was time for him to come back to the hotel. 30 minutes later they start banging on the door waking up my mom and 6 yr old. My husband could barely walk, his knees and elbows were bloody. He couldn't function. I sat up all night making sure he slept on his side so if he sat up he wouldn't choke (he puked 2 x).

I am so angry. I can't even look at him. I don't know how I'm going to deal with this anger. We had plans to go to a water park today and he was a friggin zombie.
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To_the_moon
by on Jun. 30, 2013 at 9:01 PM
I believe in second chances but it you blow it the second time I'm done with you. Of course there have been some circumstances where after certain people screw up once they were and still are out of my life.
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MommyBee12808
by on Jun. 30, 2013 at 9:07 PM
No. Once you mess up with me, we are done. I have been stepped on by too many people in the past forgiving them that I won't forgive anymore.
csxt99
by on Jun. 30, 2013 at 9:36 PM

No.  I am vindictive and can hold a grudge for many years.

villagemamma
by Member on Jun. 30, 2013 at 9:44 PM

For the most part i am a very forgiving person. i know there has been many a times where emotion of circumstance has gotten the best of me and i said or did something i regretted. I try and assess the entire situation and the person. There does come to a point where though i forgive the person does not necessarily mean that everything is good between that. Though i do allow people the opportunity to make things better.

Mama2ETA
by on Jun. 30, 2013 at 9:49 PM

 that sounds like a sad life :(

Quoting MommyBee12808:

No. Once you mess up with me, we are done. I have been stepped on by too many people in the past forgiving them that I won't forgive anymore.

 

katye43
by on Jun. 30, 2013 at 9:59 PM

 I will usually forgive anything but only after talking it out if /ive been wronged

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