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Is this rude, or is it just me? EDITED TO ADD #3

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I stopped at the grocery store this morning with my 9 month old daughter to pick up a loaf of bread.  I got in the check out line behind two people.  The lady right in front of me had a cart load of groceries.  So I stood there in line, holding my daughter and a loaf of bread waiting for my turn.

I thought it was inconsiderate to not offer to let me ahead of her.  If I find myself in a similar situation I always offer, even if I have my kids and the person behind me is alone.  To me, it's just common courtesy.

FYI. There was only 1 line open, no express line.  She absolutely knew I was there because she had to go around me to grab a magazine from the rack behind me.

ETA.  Wow.  I really didn't expect that I would be in the minority on this one.  I thought that letting someone ahead of you in line was just common courtesy, like holding the door for the person behind you.  

I'm really surprised that some of you think I was rude by expecting to be allowed to go ahead.  First of all, I didn't actually "expect" it (I've learned a long time ago that expecting people to be considerate and polite is a waste of time), I just thought it was inconsiderate. Secondly, even if I did expect it, I don't see how that would be rude.  I mean, expecting people to be kind and considerate of others is rude?  Hmmmm.  Perhaps if I had said something to her, that would have been rude, but I simply waited patiently in line with my daughter.

I do get that her time is just as important as mine, but honestly what is 30 seconds to anyone?

And, for further clarification I am not a spoiled, entitled brat.  I'm just someone who was raised to go out of my way to help others and am sometimes surprised that not everyone was taught common courtesy.

ETA #2.

Well apparently I am in the minority on this one.  I honestly thought this was a common act of courtesy.  I do it all of the time and others have done it for me. 

You can continue to believe that I am a spoiled, entitled brat.  But just remember, the next time you are stuck in traffic, trying to merge and someone lets you in it might be me.  Or if you are running through a downpour towards the bank, and someone waits an extra 5 seconds to hold the door for you, it might be me.

ETA #3.

Well, I'm glad to see I have a couple of supporters out there.  I guess we just look at the world a little differently that the majority of people.  

To those who resorted to name calling (you know who you are), all I have to say is "how rude!"




by on Jul. 5, 2013 at 10:39 AM
Replies (41-50):
Imjustinsmommy
by on Jul. 5, 2013 at 12:51 PM
1 mom liked this

I don't think you're rude or spoiled.. I do think you have  expectations  of others of what YOU would do for them & that usually doesn't work out. I do the same &   get insulted at time when I think someone isnt being considerate bc i know i try to go out of my way often..  to be its just something you do &  to ME  not doing it would  make me feel mean or rude &  be as if I dont care.. so I just assume they are all those things ya know? just projecting what you'd feel about yourself if you didnt onto them..  anyway,  as you know  not everyone will think like you or do like you. maybe she isnt as considerate.. maybe she was preoccupied & had alot on her mind & just didnt think.. you never  know  whats goign on in someones life.. maybe she had to crap REAL bad lol or felt ill, or needed to hurry home for an appt or who knows what..  so she just didnt think of you or didnt want to.. its ok though..  

Momofmenagerie
by on Jul. 5, 2013 at 1:15 PM
My father taught me a Long time ago to let the elderly and people with leads that four items go in front. Women, men, elderly, anyone.


Courtesy is being lost.

Not a thank you, when a a door is opened, not a thank you for tips or an order being filled correctly, a refill of tea.

No one remembers appropriate courtesy .
I'm sorry, but I bet she really didn't you while reaching for the magazine... People are much to much involved in themselves. But it happens.
I'm sorry
blue123244
by on Jul. 5, 2013 at 1:16 PM

let me put it this way - if I saw a woman, baby and a loaf of bread and I had a lot of things I would definately let her ahead of me and I do think it is inconsiderate, or unconsious - it's like being on a bus where all the seats are taken and you see an elderly or obviously pregnant woman get on board - you give up your seat

Paigesmommy78
by Gold Member on Jul. 5, 2013 at 1:18 PM
This

Quoting Bmat:

She was inconsiderate, but I wouldn't say rude. She was not obligated to do the right thing.

LuvingMy3Girls
by Silver Member on Jul. 5, 2013 at 1:18 PM
I don't know that rude is the right word but I always let people go ahead when they only have 1 item but who knows her situation. Maybe she was in a huge hurry

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
MrsImperfect
by on Jul. 5, 2013 at 1:38 PM
That's why I said general you. Meaning anyone.

Quoting LDavis33:

I didn't feel entitled to go ahead of her, I just thought it was inconsiderate not to offer.  

Quoting MrsImperfect:

I am always considerate of others. Always. Thats just my nature. Even though people are not to me. If I see that I usually let the person go ahead of me but I don't always pay attention to what the person behind me has or is doing. BUT I don't see it as rude when the gesture isn't offered. I do feel its rude to assume (general) you have the obligation to go ahead of anyone just because you have less stuff. Or if your standing in line huffing about not being able to go ahead.


coupon_ash_back
by on Jul. 5, 2013 at 1:41 PM
Early bird takes the worm. Wanted that spot? Should of grabbed the bread sooner. She's not the inconsiderate one.
coupon_ash_back
by on Jul. 5, 2013 at 1:44 PM
How is it common courtesy? If I'm next I'm next. I don't look at whose behind me to see how much or little they have. All I care about is watching my kids.
terpmama
by Gold Member on Jul. 5, 2013 at 2:00 PM
Ah but you are judging her entire personality based on one encounter. She may be the most kind and giving person ewe but in that instance was in a time crunch that did not allow her to waste time. Much like the women here have judged you to be an entitled brat (your words I haven't read many replies) who judges others based on one post of your feelings.
LDavis33
by Bronze Member on Jul. 5, 2013 at 2:18 PM

I didn't judge her as a person based on this one encounter.  Of course, I don't know her, and you are absolutely right.  She could be a very kind, considerate person.  I was simply looking at her actions (or non-actions) in this particular circumstance.    

Quoting terpmama:

Ah but you are judging her entire personality based on one encounter. She may be the most kind and giving person ewe but in that instance was in a time crunch that did not allow her to waste time. Much like the women here have judged you to be an entitled brat (your words I haven't read many replies) who judges others based on one post of your feelings.


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