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visitation pick ups

Posted by on Jul. 16, 2013 at 6:32 AM
  • 12 Replies

My ex texted me and asked me from now on when he comes can he pick up our son at my house. I told him no our CO says police station because when he is around me or we talk he is known for verbally abusing me and swearing at me. At the police station he doesn't do that. If he wasn't verbally abusive I would let him come to my house.


Also when he comes to my house he is never on time for drop offs and pick ups. I did compromise with him though. He said 9am was to early for a pick up so I asked him what time works for him and he said 10 so I agreed changing it to 10. He cannot even make it on time for that. Also he never brings him back on time he always shuts his phone off when he has our son. So also the police station fixes all those issues.


Opinions? Did I do the right thing by saying no? 

by on Jul. 16, 2013 at 6:32 AM
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Replies (1-10):
BrownEyedGirl86
by Platinum Member on Jul. 16, 2013 at 6:50 AM
I think if you don't feel comfortable AND. Court agreed you did the right thing.

As for him not being on time I think although its annoying and rude for him to be instantly late this may be one of your "pick your battle" moments.
AAP1988
by on Jul. 16, 2013 at 6:53 AM

Actually him being on time is very important I cannot run my life around him I have things to do and places to be when my son gets dropped off.


Quoting BrownEyedGirl86:

I think if you don't feel comfortable AND. Court agreed you did the right thing.

As for him not being on time I think although its annoying and rude for him to be instantly late this may be one of your "pick your battle" moments.



BrownEyedGirl86
by Platinum Member on Jul. 16, 2013 at 7:09 AM
I understand that and have been through and still go through similar things. I jut plan everything on those days an hour or so later.
It's not worth causing waves when it's healthier for the child to have their parents get along.


Quoting AAP1988:

Actually him being on time is very important I cannot run my life around him I have things to do and places to be when my son gets dropped off.



Quoting BrownEyedGirl86:

I think if you don't feel comfortable AND. Court agreed you did the right thing.



As for him not being on time I think although its annoying and rude for him to be instantly late this may be one of your "pick your battle" moments.




AAP1988
by on Jul. 16, 2013 at 7:11 AM

I wait the required half hr and when he isn't there I leave. 


Quoting BrownEyedGirl86:

I understand that and have been through and still go through similar things. I jut plan everything on those days an hour or so later.
It's not worth causing waves when it's healthier for the child to have their parents get along.


Quoting AAP1988:

Actually him being on time is very important I cannot run my life around him I have things to do and places to be when my son gets dropped off.



Quoting BrownEyedGirl86:

I think if you don't feel comfortable AND. Court agreed you did the right thing.



As for him not being on time I think although its annoying and rude for him to be instantly late this may be one of your "pick your battle" moments.






NDADanceMom
by on Jul. 16, 2013 at 7:14 AM
1 mom liked this
You need professional help. Do you have any thoughts or posts other than about your x and how terrible he is? You picked him. You had a kid with him.
Your life is now devoted to showing how you are some victim and he is the bad guy. You sound weak, he sounds like a loser that i wouldn't even make eye contact with, much less screw him. Now you let him be the obsession of every thought, word and act of yours.
Get over yourself. Honestly if i had to deal with you I'd verbally abuse you too. You are nothing but full of comaints and bitterness. You aren't a victim you are a volunteer. I'm not sure is be willing to see my own kids if it meant going near you.
BrownEyedGirl86
by Platinum Member on Jul. 16, 2013 at 7:40 AM
Then how do you get your child back?

Quoting AAP1988:

I wait the required half hr and when he isn't there I leave. 



Quoting BrownEyedGirl86:

I understand that and have been through and still go through similar things. I jut plan everything on those days an hour or so later.

It's not worth causing waves when it's healthier for the child to have their parents get along.




Quoting AAP1988:

Actually him being on time is very important I cannot run my life around him I have things to do and places to be when my son gets dropped off.




Quoting BrownEyedGirl86:

I think if you don't feel comfortable AND. Court agreed you did the right thing.





As for him not being on time I think although its annoying and rude for him to be instantly late this may be one of your "pick your battle" moments.








AAP1988
by on Jul. 16, 2013 at 7:46 AM

Your entitled to your opinion. I am sorry that you think the ncp's should have all the say and cp should just bow down and take crap from ncp. 


Quoting NDADanceMom:

You need professional help. Do you have any thoughts or posts other than about your x and how terrible he is? You picked him. You had a kid with him.
Your life is now devoted to showing how you are some victim and he is the bad guy. You sound weak, he sounds like a loser that i wouldn't even make eye contact with, much less screw him. Now you let him be the obsession of every thought, word and act of yours.
Get over yourself. Honestly if i had to deal with you I'd verbally abuse you too. You are nothing but full of comaints and bitterness. You aren't a victim you are a volunteer. I'm not sure is be willing to see my own kids if it meant going near you.



AAP1988
by on Jul. 16, 2013 at 7:48 AM

He was always late dropping him off when pick ups were at my house. I wouldn't mind if he was late at pick ups once in awhile but it's everytime he has a visitation. 


Quoting BrownEyedGirl86:

Then how do you get your child back?

Quoting AAP1988:

I wait the required half hr and when he isn't there I leave. 



Quoting BrownEyedGirl86:

I understand that and have been through and still go through similar things. I jut plan everything on those days an hour or so later.

It's not worth causing waves when it's healthier for the child to have their parents get along.




Quoting AAP1988:

Actually him being on time is very important I cannot run my life around him I have things to do and places to be when my son gets dropped off.




Quoting BrownEyedGirl86:

I think if you don't feel comfortable AND. Court agreed you did the right thing.





As for him not being on time I think although its annoying and rude for him to be instantly late this may be one of your "pick your battle" moments.










BrownEyedGirl86
by Platinum Member on Jul. 16, 2013 at 7:52 AM
I understand that. And I deal with the same thing.

How do you get your child back if you leave after a half hour and he doesn't drop off at your house


Quoting AAP1988:

He was always late dropping him off when pick ups were at my house. I wouldn't mind if he was late at pick ups once in awhile but it's everytime he has a visitation. 



Quoting BrownEyedGirl86:

Then how do you get your child back?



Quoting AAP1988:

I wait the required half hr and when he isn't there I leave. 




Quoting BrownEyedGirl86:

I understand that and have been through and still go through similar things. I jut plan everything on those days an hour or so later.


It's not worth causing waves when it's healthier for the child to have their parents get along.






Quoting AAP1988:

Actually him being on time is very important I cannot run my life around him I have things to do and places to be when my son gets dropped off.





Quoting BrownEyedGirl86:

I think if you don't feel comfortable AND. Court agreed you did the right thing.







As for him not being on time I think although its annoying and rude for him to be instantly late this may be one of your "pick your battle" moments.













NDADanceMom
by on Jul. 16, 2013 at 7:53 AM
1 mom liked this
I NEVER said that, but i don't think you get all the power either. You don't listen. You hear what you want to hear which PROVES to me that you would be impossible to co parent with. I guarantee you have mental illness issues. You don't take any responsibility for anything. You are the one causing problems.
Let it go. I DARE you to spend a month allowing the man to see his kid whenever he wants without whining or complaining to ANYONE. I bet you can't. I bet you can't take one day of just being cooperative. If you did you would see that your life would be easier. You probably live the drama though. Its all you have. I bet you have no close friends, no family that wants to be around and no job.


Quoting AAP1988:

Your entitled to your opinion. I am sorry that you think the ncp's should have all the say and cp should just bow down and take crap from ncp. 



Quoting NDADanceMom:

You need professional help. Do you have any thoughts or posts other than about your x and how terrible he is? You picked him. You had a kid with him.

Your life is now devoted to showing how you are some victim and he is the bad guy. You sound weak, he sounds like a loser that i wouldn't even make eye contact with, much less screw him. Now you let him be the obsession of every thought, word and act of yours.

Get over yourself. Honestly if i had to deal with you I'd verbally abuse you too. You are nothing but full of comaints and bitterness. You aren't a victim you are a volunteer. I'm not sure is be willing to see my own kids if it meant going near you.




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