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BF helping save for divorce...

Posted by on Jul. 17, 2013 at 9:28 PM
  • 12 Replies
So my Soon to be XDH and I are filing for divorce on our own and it's about $500. He's paying half and I'm paying half. I'm extremely bad at putting aside money. If' it's in my bank account, I assume I have it to spend. So out of every check I get, I've been giving my BF a specified amount for him to set aside for me until I have enough to pay for the divorce. My best friend seems to have an issue with this. She says it's wrong/weird to have my current BF help me save to divorce...I don't see it...Is it wrong/weird?
by on Jul. 17, 2013 at 9:28 PM
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Replies (1-10):
jobberwocky
by Chrissy on Jul. 17, 2013 at 9:31 PM
1 mom liked this

If thats what works for you then dont worry about what your friend thinks. At least you know you are bad about saving money so you came up with a plan to ensure you save the money. 

a06z08mama
by Silver Member on Jul. 17, 2013 at 9:35 PM
You are saving it but just not leaving it in your possession. Just like a bank account. But not easy access. It works for you. So friends shouldn't worry about it. Now unless current was just using you then the friend should worry. But if not. No need to.
Momofmenagerie
by on Jul. 17, 2013 at 9:51 PM
4 moms liked this
Isn't now the time to learn to save money yourself at this point, instead of putting your full trust in another man?

Honestly? Women ( with or without children) should really learn to deal with money and budgets w/o leaning on a male before handing over the reigns. Put that money in a savings account yourself.

No, I don't think your bf is going to mess you over.... I couldn't possibly know that. But you aren't divorced yet and are already leaning on another male to hold on to money b/c you say you aren't good with it. Well.... How will you get better with finances if you can't discipline to save up for your own divorce?
KidsTea3
by on Jul. 17, 2013 at 10:32 PM

It makes me wonder why your best friend has a issue with it.

Is because of you not being able to do it yourself or because she does not trust him or ..... Maybe as your best friend she was hoping you would put the trust in her and ask her to hold on to the money?

At the end of the day... Do what you feel comfortable doing!

frndlyfn
by Emerald Member on Jul. 17, 2013 at 10:42 PM

You need to learn how to budget yourself but at least you found someone you can trust to hold on to said money.  I thought you meant he was putting his own money aside for your divorce.  After this is done, find a financial advisor so you can get a savings account started that is harder to access than with a debit card.

Rachael-Dawn
by Bronze Member on Jul. 17, 2013 at 10:57 PM
Your having your boyfriend help you save for your divorce? Did I understand that correctly?
coupon_ash_back
by on Jul. 18, 2013 at 2:29 AM
Quoting Rachael-Dawn:

Your having your boyfriend help you save for your divorce? Did I understand that correctly?

thats how I took it. Not sure why op has a bf...but whatever.
luvbooks
by on Jul. 18, 2013 at 2:38 AM

Open a savings account and each month have an automatic transfer from your checking to your savings account for a specific amount on the 10th of the month or whatever day fits your pay schedule.  You should be doing this anyway whether saving up for a purpose or not.  It's just good financial management.

TotallyWarped
by Silver Member on Jul. 18, 2013 at 11:50 AM
XDH and I have been separated for a year and this BF did not exist as a BF until after we were already separated. We had been friends 6-7 years ago and reconnected months after XDH and I split. He is taking MY money and setting it aside for me. HIS money is NOT going towards my divorce.

Quoting coupon_ash_back:

Quoting Rachael-Dawn:

Your having your boyfriend help you save for your divorce? Did I understand that correctly?

thats how I took it. Not sure why op has a bf...but whatever.
mommy2zbg
by Member on Jul. 18, 2013 at 11:52 AM

 he isn't really helping you save... none of the money is his right? It's your money and he is just holding onto it for you. If it works, don't pay any attention to what your friend thinks.

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