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Children & Baby Showers

Posted by on Aug. 20, 2013 at 2:42 AM
  • 10 Replies
Hello everyone! Ok I need some advice. I am still early in my pregnancy but I like to have things in order. I am making a list of people I want to invite to my baby shower & I am not sure if I want some people's children there. This is my second pregnancy and at my first shower I had about 7 kids 4 nieces and 3 that were a good friends. On the invitations I put "Please no Children". And of course there was that one person who brought there child anyways. But it turned out fine. However this time I have some family that will have moved back to the area and my cousin is already telling me she will be here for my shower this time. She has 2 children and they are HORRIBLE!! So I told her I'm not having any children, so she said she might not be able to come. And of course I feel bad but her kids are very hard to handle and she just lets them run wildly! I would like my little boy to be there to help celebrate his new brother or sister, & my nieces whom are very close with me! But I don't want any others there. Is that wrong?? And what about my cousin's kids is that wrong to feel that way?? Please Help!!
by on Aug. 20, 2013 at 2:42 AM
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Replies (1-10):
alexsmomma06
by Bronze Member on Aug. 20, 2013 at 2:55 AM

Not at all. This shower is about you and your baby. Make sure everyone knows that no children are allowed to attend, if they get offended then oh well.

No one wants to be about horrible disruptive children, even if they are family.

frndlyfn
by Emerald Member on Aug. 20, 2013 at 3:08 AM

If you say no children that means no children aside from the older siblings that are excited for their new sibling coming.

PrdMmy22
by on Aug. 20, 2013 at 3:44 AM
Thank you that makes me feel better!
SissyAnn141
by on Aug. 20, 2013 at 4:19 AM

 

Quoting frndlyfn:

If you say no children that means no children aside from the older siblings that are excited for their new sibling coming.

 A sitter,  is provided at $ 5 dollars per child.

 Hire a TEEN.

NDADanceMom
by on Aug. 20, 2013 at 6:49 AM

Its either all or none on the kids.  Im pretty ballsey and I would tell my friend with the wild kids that you would like to work out a hand signal with her so when her kids are being diruptive she can remove them from the room.  "hey suzie. I love you and your kids but in the past here is what happened that made me uncomfortable......   I want all my guests to have a good time and if your kids are making others uncomfortable I would like you to remove them from the room until they calm down."

Suzie may not like what you say and decide not to come, on the other hand she may not realize her kids are a problem.  If nobody ever says anything how is she suppose to change?

PrdMmy22
by on Aug. 20, 2013 at 7:53 AM
Its my cousin and I am always very honest with her but she has been through a lot lately and she is so excited she will be here for my shower I just dont want to hurt her feelings! And honestly I want my son there so he can help celebrate his new sibling, & my nieces whom I am very close with other than that I dont really want any kids there becuz that would be a lot of kids. I wasn't even sure at first about my son or nieces being there but then I decided they are very important to me and should be there especially my son!


Quoting NDADanceMom:

Its either all or none on the kids.  Im pretty ballsey and I would tell my friend with the wild kids that you would like to work out a hand signal with her so when her kids are being diruptive she can remove them from the room.  "hey suzie. I love you and your kids but in the past here is what happened that made me uncomfortable......   I want all my guests to have a good time and if your kids are making others uncomfortable I would like you to remove them from the room until they calm down."

Suzie may not like what you say and decide not to come, on the other hand she may not realize her kids are a problem.  If nobody ever says anything how is she suppose to change?


ajdahd13
by on Aug. 20, 2013 at 8:01 AM
I can understand wanting your child there, but excluding some kids, and not all, is wrong. They're coming to celebrate your unborn child, and bring a gift (that they don't need to bring).
NDADanceMom
by on Aug. 20, 2013 at 8:41 AM

Just tell her that.  Tell her you know things are hard right now and you want her there, but you are concerned about certain behaviors of her son.  A shower should be relaxing and enjoyable for everyone.  Tell her you have limited space and only people that are close to you are invited.  You are close to some kids but not all kids.  It would be different if her child were small and quiet but he would be disruptive.

I have a friend with a son who is very rude.  He is 5 and at church he talks loudly during prayers and such, at parties he causes trouble with other kids.  I hosted a party at our cabin a few weeks ago and she was invited and I sat down with her before the party.  I told her that the boats and jet skis were dangerous.  We would be grilling and have a buffet out.  There will be other kids who are quiet and shy there.  I talked about things that I have noticed he does on a regular basis.  I told her she could handle things as she saw fit but if I had to talk to her about her son it was time for him to go.  It was an hour drive for her and I wanted her on notice that if he was putting his hand in the potato salad, putting things in the  grill to start on fire, pushing other kids, kicking the dog, trying to drive the watercraft unsupervised... all things he has tried in the past.... they would have to go home.  

Things went fine at the party.  She brought her son and kept an eye on him for once.  Im sure the party was less fun for her than usual because her day was spent keeping him under control instead of her regular, parking herself in a lawn chair and enjoying daiquiris all day.  

Quoting PrdMmy22:

Its my cousin and I am always very honest with her but she has been through a lot lately and she is so excited she will be here for my shower I just dont want to hurt her feelings! And honestly I want my son there so he can help celebrate his new sibling, & my nieces whom I am very close with other than that I dont really want any kids there becuz that would be a lot of kids. I wasn't even sure at first about my son or nieces being there but then I decided they are very important to me and should be there especially my son!


Quoting NDADanceMom:

Its either all or none on the kids.  Im pretty ballsey and I would tell my friend with the wild kids that you would like to work out a hand signal with her so when her kids are being diruptive she can remove them from the room.  "hey suzie. I love you and your kids but in the past here is what happened that made me uncomfortable......   I want all my guests to have a good time and if your kids are making others uncomfortable I would like you to remove them from the room until they calm down."

Suzie may not like what you say and decide not to come, on the other hand she may not realize her kids are a problem.  If nobody ever says anything how is she suppose to change?



PrdMmy22
by on Aug. 20, 2013 at 12:47 PM
I just want my son there and my nieces because they are very close to me. One comes to my house every weekend so she will also be close to the baby!


Quoting ajdahd13:

I can understand wanting your child there, but excluding some kids, and not all, is wrong. They're coming to celebrate your unborn child, and bring a gift (that they don't need to bring).

flaquitabss
by Member on Aug. 20, 2013 at 12:54 PM

Its your party and you decide the rules.  If you say no children, then no children it is.   Even if you decide to invite your son/nieces.   

The propper way is to address the invite with the name of the person you want at the party. "No children" should not be used unless there will actually will be NO KIDS involved at all.  

In the bottom of the invite write "If you must bring your child, there will be a sitter at my home that will charge $10 per child, please rsvp and indicate if you would need her services, so that enough food, drinks and sitters are available for the kids"   The $10 fee will cover cost of pizza, snacks and drinks as well as 1 or 2 sitters to entertain the little ones.   Good luck!

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