I really just to need vent about all the stuff that has been going on and I have no one to talk to about all of this. So I will start from the beginning.
When I was 15 I found I was pregnant at 4 months, yes I was on BC. I had my son about 3 months after my 16th bday and I married my son's dad right after I turned 16. Big Mistake!!! 2 months after I gave birth to my son I found out I was pregnant again, there dad raped me. Once I found out that I was pregnant he became more violent beating me up and choking me until I would pass out. I stayed because I do not beileve in divorce. When our youngest son was 4 months old he, there dad, looked me in the eyes and told me he was to young to be a dad and kicked me and the children out of the house with no where to go. He was 19 I was 17. Life went on I got my GED, a job, my own car, my own house and moved on with my life.
Fast forward 2 years I met a man named Justin who was my bff. We decided to get married so I had to go to my church and ask for permission to divorce my ex as I did not want to shame my family. They agreed and the divorce went through. When we got married I was 3 months pregnant with mine and Justin's daughter. Before we got married I did the whole do you have kids? I met his family, we were together for 2 years before we got married,
A couple of months after we get married I discovered that he was having women pay his phone bill, I believed him when he told me he was paying for it . That's lie #1. A couple of months later we found out that our daughter was a stillborn at 32 weeks it was devastating for us. A couple of more months pass and he begins to get more angrer toward me he shoved me up against a wall called me a B and threatened to kill me. Having been in a abusive relationship before I slapped him and told him to never touch me like that again. He promised it would never happen again. A month later he beats his dad up so bad that his dad is hospitalized .he told me his dad was trying to stab him and it was self defense. Lie#2. I tried to leave him but his dad called and begged me to stay with him because I was the best thing to ever happen to his son. So I stayed stupid on my part but o well. A couple of months later I found out I was pregnant again. My husband got angry again and pushed me as I was walking away from him. I now have a bulging disk that I need surgery on and on top of it all I miscarried my baby at 8 weeks.
On my birthday August 1 we lost our home and began to crash on people's couches with my boys in tow. We were staying at his mom's house one night and I over hear a conversation between my mother in law and my husband about his daughter. (whom I did not know exsisted). I confront him about it later and he then informs that she is 10 years old and her name is Dixie. He never told me not once about this girl even after I specificlly asked. And that his ex is coming after him for over 50,000 in back child support. And the reason why all of this is being brought up now....my mother in law went looking for Dixie. In my opinion I don't care if Dixie wants to be apart of our life I would have supported my husband. My husband told his mother that it was mine and his decision as to what we do next, through the courts and if he wanted to fight for custody or not. His mother believed it was her decision not ours. She shows up at the hotel we are staying at and starts screaming at me that this decision does not involve me. I then informed her that it does because my husband and my kids are my family and it doesn't just effect Justin or her it effects everyone. His mother then hit me and sadly I hit her back. Now I just want to get away from my husband and his stupid family and all his lies and betrayals. I deserve better I need better. But i can not afford to take care of my children on my own. I want to leave him as soon as I finish my psychology degree so I will be able to get a good job. I just needed to vent I don't understand how people can be so stupid to ruin everyone's life because they are unhappy in there's. I just want to give up and crawl into a corner and cry.