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My son wants to move out!

Posted by on Sep. 4, 2013 at 8:14 AM
  • 24 Replies

So last night, my son, who is 7 and just started 2nd grade, informed me that he no longer wants to live with us. There's no divorce or remarraige, there are no big family upheavals, he just doesn't want to live here, because, " we're mean, we yell and Daddy hurts his feelings". Yeah, he gets in trouble, he also has ADHD, gets assistance at school for behavior issues, and his dad tries to joke around with him a lot. In fact yasterday he refused to get on the bus and I had to drive him to school, so, I did yell at him for that. I figure he's trying to see just how much attention he'll garner by deciding he wants to move somewhere else. Funny, his first choice for the relocation was our friends house, then Grandma's, now its the much wealthier family down the street. (Heck, I'd like to live in their house, too, but I wouldn't want to pay their bills!!) So, has anyone else dealt with a similar situation? What did you do to get through it? Do you go along with the fantasy, acting like its no big deal, or try to reason it out? I'm sure its just a phase, but what if its not?

by on Sep. 4, 2013 at 8:14 AM
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Replies (1-10):
momdoes
by Platinum Member on Sep. 4, 2013 at 8:20 AM
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Sounds classic behavior from a kid who is not getting his way. LOL

Let him "pack". BUT as he does so, stay with him and remind of each and every thing he puts in the suitcase to take with him (because we all know kids have their "special" items that mean the world to them), remind how he got that item, who gave it to him, why he got it, when, etc. It should hit home with him that HOME is where he is wanted and needed and should stay. I would even go as far as to arrange with gma and parents of the friend to go along and agree to allow him to come there but keep the packing thing in mind.

It is a phase. He is testing you. He is lashing out and purposely trying tohurt you by remoiving himself from the family. (he knows that would get at you)

susannah2000
by Bronze Member on Sep. 4, 2013 at 8:26 AM
1 mom liked this

Don't all kids wanna "run away from home"  when they are young? They want to run off and join the circus or whatever. All kids are dissatisfied with home at one time and another, and want different siblings and parents. Very natural.

Summermum
by on Sep. 4, 2013 at 8:47 AM

Oh, he's a piece of work, alright. He even claims he wouldn't mind if there was no TV or his favorite snacks at the other house. I've considered arrainging for him to have dinner there and have the family act truly horrific! As my mom always says, "this too shall pass".

susannah2000
by Bronze Member on Sep. 4, 2013 at 8:57 AM
1 mom liked this



Quoting momdoes:

Sounds classic behavior from a kid who is not getting his way. LOL

Let him "pack". BUT as he does so, stay with him and remind of each and every thing he puts in the suitcase to take with him (because we all know kids have their "special" items that mean the world to them), remind how he got that item, who gave it to him, why he got it, when, etc. It should hit home with him that HOME is where he is wanted and needed and should stay. I would even go as far as to arrange with gma and parents of the friend to go along and agree to allow him to come there but keep the packing thing in mind.

It is a phase. He is testing you. He is lashing out and purposely trying tohurt you by remoiving himself from the family. (he knows that would get at you)

I don't even think at that age he is trying to be hurtful. I think he is old enough to start noticing differences in other people's lives and families and homes, and the grass is looking greener there, during unfun moments at home.. Kids that age are still egocentric, it's all about them. I wouldn't make a big deal of it.


momdoes
by Platinum Member on Sep. 4, 2013 at 9:01 AM

 

You are right but I base my comment on the fact that the boy wants to move out because daddy is mean and what not. Screams at me that he got into trouble (which the op states such) and he is retailiating by wanting to move out. He is hurt (pride) by getting into trouble and he wants others inthe home to hurt too.

Quoting susannah2000:

 

 

Quoting momdoes:

Sounds classic behavior from a kid who is not getting his way. LOL

Let him "pack". BUT as he does so, stay with him and remind of each and every thing he puts in the suitcase to take with him (because we all know kids have their "special" items that mean the world to them), remind how he got that item, who gave it to him, why he got it, when, etc. It should hit home with him that HOME is where he is wanted and needed and should stay. I would even go as far as to arrange with gma and parents of the friend to go along and agree to allow him to come there but keep the packing thing in mind.

It is a phase. He is testing you. He is lashing out and purposely trying tohurt you by remoiving himself from the family. (he knows that would get at you)

I don't even think at that age he is trying to be hurtful. I think he is old enough to start noticing differences in other people's lives and families and homes, and the grass is looking greener there, during unfun moments at home.. Kids that age are still egocentric, it's all about them. I wouldn't make a big deal of it.

 


 

BoxxyBabee
by on Sep. 4, 2013 at 9:05 AM
Wow id want to move away too.
Teddybear2015
by on Sep. 4, 2013 at 10:04 AM

     Every kid want to move out when they can't get their way, or get what they want it's normal. But make sure you don't feed into it because kids will try their parents in every way they can. I will only let him back what he woked for not for what his parents bought for him and that is probaly nothing and this will make him think a second time before he try yall again. And remind him that he will have to get a job when he moves so he can pay his own bills even though he is 7 you will have to get on his level and he will understand that he rather stay at home with his loving parents.!!!!

RADmomma
by on Sep. 4, 2013 at 11:01 AM
My daughter tried that too... All because I said no cookies for breakfast. She called grampa & told him to come get her because I'm a meanie.... She was 4. I died laughing. Grampa told her that she couldn't have cookies for breakfast at his house either. Her reply ... " awe, poop... Guess ill stay here. " then huffed into her room!!

It's a kid thing. It will pass!
frndlyfn
by Emerald Member on Sep. 4, 2013 at 11:48 AM

Yup most kids will go through this.  The best way to tame the monster is not give it any attention that is extreme.  When he says it again, ask him to grab his suit case so we can go together and pack what he needs to move.  Specials items stay behind though since family bought those for him and they stay at our house.  A calm demeanor will work better even when we, the parents, feel frazzled.   

cjsix
by faith on Sep. 4, 2013 at 1:55 PM
Quoting RADmomma:

My daughter tried that too... All because I said no cookies for breakfast. She called grampa & told him to come get her because I'm a meanie.... She was 4. I died laughing. Grampa told her that she couldn't have cookies for breakfast at his house either. Her reply ... " awe, poop... Guess ill stay here. " then huffed into her room!!

It's a kid thing. It will pass!
LOL! So funny! Been there with mine when they were that age...yep,they'll get past this. I love the idea of reminding them where everything they are packing came from.
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