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Advice? Son 9y/o with ADHD. Indianapolis Area

Posted by on Sep. 10, 2013 at 4:30 AM
  • 7 Replies

 

I am new to Cafe Mom and excited to share and benefit from everyone's experience and opinion.  I have a son who will be 10 next month.  It has been very obvious for about 6 years now that he is textbook ADHD.  We didn't even broach the issue until he was nearly 7.  At that time when his challenges became obvious as they were appearing even during times he was doing activities he enjoys.  He was on 3 different meds (one at a time) over the course of a year with varying side effects.  We decided about 1 and a half years ago to discontinue medication indefinitely or until all other choices were exhausted.  As he gets older, these challenges with focus, attention, impulsivity, and maturity become more and more pronounced.  Currently, I am investigating avenues including Acupuncture and counseling in hopes to help him learn to process his thoughts and feelings and increase my effectiveness to help support him as a parent.  I don't want the frustration he in experiencing to become overwhelming and discourage him in his pursuits.  Anyone have any experience with these alternatives?  And anyone in the Indianapolis area have recommendations for providers of these services?

 

Thank you in advance, and I look forward to getting to know you all:)

Amberbat

by on Sep. 10, 2013 at 4:30 AM
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Replies (1-7):
schultzal
by Bronze Member on Sep. 10, 2013 at 5:00 AM
I can recommend a great practice just north of Indy, for therapy/counseling. Pm me if you'd like their details.

Unfortunately, I don't know of any acupuncturists to recommend.
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jhslove
by on Sep. 10, 2013 at 5:56 AM
1 mom liked this

Take my advice for what it's worth--I have ADHD and was diagnosed when I was nine.

IMO, whether or not a child is on meds (and meds shouldn't be the first resort) counseling and a close working relationship between parents and teachers is absolutely crucial. I was on meds as a child for ADHD, although I was eventually able to go off of them. BUT, I was also in weekly behavioral counseling, my parents worked closely with my teachers, and there was a lot of accountability and follow-up. I had special seating (it was much easier for me to focus--and still is--if I sat in the front of the room), my teachers had to sign my homework planner at the end of each class to verify that I'd written down my assignments, etc. And my parents still held me to very high standards. I had to do my work and behave in school, and if I didn't I got into trouble, just as any kid should.

My parents worked hard to give me the tools to cope with my ADHD, but meds were just one of those tools. And the diagnosis was never allowed to be an excuse. I hear so many parents these days (not implying that you're one of them!) who say, "Oh, he can't help it, he has ADHD". "Oh, she can't be expected to control her impulses and behave in school, because she has ADHD". This is such a disservice to the kids. These are skills that they're going to NEED in order to be successful, functioning adults. Recognize the diagnosis and give them coping mechanisms, definitely--but it can't be an excuse.

Anyway, just FWIW--yes, I think counseling is absolutely necessary. Sorry I can't help with a recommendation for a practice, though. I don't really know anything about acupuncture.   :)

funhappymom
by on Sep. 10, 2013 at 8:39 AM

I'm sorry I have no advice or suggestions for you but here's a bump.


sahmw2010
by on Sep. 10, 2013 at 8:47 AM
I have ADD and so does DD. all i know is the meds helped me and are helping her. I cant help you
LancesMom
by Ruby Member on Sep. 10, 2013 at 9:35 AM
1 mom liked this

We didn't use alternatives, my son was on Concerta and it worked tremendously.


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sunpeaches1
by on Sep. 10, 2013 at 9:57 AM
Bump! I feel ya! I also have a ds w adhd. We've had lots of hurdles to jump w him & are continuing every method we can to help him fight against his difficulties. My biggest help was having a pediatrician that REALLY knew about adhd. He was medicated, & doing great on a low dose, but off meds now because we just moved to the midwest (central Illinois) & I haven't found a new doc yet. The new doc has some really big shoes to fill. Me & both my sons cried saying goodbye to our old doc!
Are you employing any other behaviour modifications like behavior therapies? What kind of adjustments do you make in families daily life in helping ds learn to adjust to his adhd? Are you happy w the pediatrician & his suggestions for ds?
I have joined the group for adhd/autism parents here but I've actually found the most help from an online forum called daily strength in a group for parents of children w adhd. It was a god send was I was at my wits end & felt all alone!
Hit me up anytime & we can swap advice in helping our wonderful children who have to fight a lil harder to keep tracks in this life!
sunpeaches1
by on Sep. 10, 2013 at 10:06 AM
This exactly!! My ds was dx adhd shortly after he turned 6 but we noticed his issues beginning as young as 3. We exhausted every other tests & exams before he was old enough to pin point it was adhd. I was against meds & doc said he hated telling me to medicate but at that age they just didnt have the comprehension that they have to find the tools to help themselves. Doc started on lowest doses & slowly increased till there was a true help to just bring him down a level to help him so that he can learn to focus himself. Doc said *I don't wanna dope up your son or change his personality. We just wanna give him a fighting chance so that he can start to learn the tools to do it himself*.
We do not allow adhd as an excuse. In contrast, we use adhd as a reason to be more firm & employ more structure. Children w adhd need to learn to fight against their struggles & allowing them an excuse not to is a huge disservice to them!


Quoting jhslove:

Take my advice for what it's worth--I have ADHD and was diagnosed when I was nine.

IMO, whether or not a child is on meds (and meds shouldn't be the first resort) counseling and a close working relationship between parents and teachers is absolutely crucial. I was on meds as a child for ADHD, although I was eventually able to go off of them. BUT, I was also in weekly behavioral counseling, my parents worked closely with my teachers, and there was a lot of accountability and follow-up. I had special seating (it was much easier for me to focus--and still is--if I sat in the front of the room), my teachers had to sign my homework planner at the end of each class to verify that I'd written down my assignments, etc. And my parents still held me to very high standards. I had to do my work and behave in school, and if I didn't I got into trouble, just as any kid should.

My parents worked hard to give me the tools to cope with my ADHD, but meds were just one of those tools. And the diagnosis was never allowed to be an excuse. I hear so many parents these days (not implying that you're one of them!) who say, "Oh, he can't help it, he has ADHD". "Oh, she can't be expected to control her impulses and behave in school, because she has ADHD". This is such a disservice to the kids. These are skills that they're going to NEED in order to be successful, functioning adults. Recognize the diagnosis and give them coping mechanisms, definitely--but it can't be an excuse.

Anyway, just FWIW--yes, I think counseling is absolutely necessary. Sorry I can't help with a recommendation for a practice, though. I don't really know anything about acupuncture.   :)


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